"Dan" has not been been having the best luck with the local wildlife. Yesterday a baboon made off with his passport, and now today another critter invades his tent. Make that three critters: a black cat (oh, great) and Summer and Les, who barge into Dan's tent and proceed to go through his luggage.
Note: today's post title was suggested by TB's blog entry from 10/29/11.
The idea that a live animal could somehow survive an international flight undetected in a duffel bag either speaks very well for baggage handlers or very poorly for the TSA, I'm not sure which.
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Uh, this Dan guy accidentally packed a LIVE CAT in his luggage? Uh, yeah TB, I'm sure THAT really happened. So far this whole thing couldn't possibly have less to do with climbing any mountains. Or less to do with humor for that matter.
Bumpy roads, thieving monkeys, moronic fellow tourists, animal torture, terrible unfunny jokes no one but TB gets. I'm glad to see that the natural wonders of the Dark Continent made such a profound impression on TomBat and his characters.
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What a twist. So we are expected to believe that a cat crawled into this guy's carry-on bag, made it through the TSA Safety Dance, made it onto the plane, and is JUST NOW being discovered? OR that somehow this cat survived a six-eight hour trip in a depressurized luggage compartment, and is JUST NOW starting to make noise. See, this is a prime example of this guy's shitty, so-called "writing." Tom Batwig wants us to believe that he writes gritty, true-to-life storylines…but then he pulls this nonsense. This is one quarter mile from reality.
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On the other hand, it looks like Dan can now make a trade to get his passport back.
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"Stupid" is too refined a term for today's strip.
I just…wow.
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Dan: "There's something in my tent! I can hear it making scraping noises!"
Summer: "Um, considering there's a lot of wildlife in the area, do you think we ought to find someone with experience with the native fauna bef-"
*Les shoves Summer inside*
Summer: "….ohhhh-kay. I guess I'll rifle through the belongings of a complete stranger in search of an unknown, possibly dangerous animal."
Les: "Yes, yes you did. …*…I mean yes, yes you will."
Summer: "Huh. Somehow, a cute stray kitten got into your luggage, survived rough handling and no food, litter box, or water, and made no sound at all until now! Gee. In an area teeming with dangerous wildlife, a sudden cute, fragile domestic animal. FORESHADOWING!"
Les: "Nah, it's just a coincidence."
Dan: "You lady, please don't smirk that close to my face. It makes me break out in hives."
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Good one, Jimmy.
By the way, who's the Chinese boy in the last panel?
So is "Africa" one of those cat eating countries?
Anyway, you think Leg Warmer Dan has problems now? Wait 'til he gets back home, opens his suitcase and that goddam babboon jumps out and rips his dick off. Oh, to be a fly on the wall!
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I just shake my head, slowly back and forth, until my headache gets so bad I pass out. Then I do the same thing again when I wake up.
Am I missing something? Is FW such a massive financial success that Tom Batiuk can surround himself with sycophants who willingly shield him from all real-world criticism?
I guess so, to the point where no one in the last couple of years has said, "Say, Tom, the strip is really terrible. It has awful characters, stupid situations, no jokes, bad drawing…I think you should retire and sit on your laurels while you still have them."
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Dan reaches into his bag for something and pulls out his TV remote. "Uh oh, my wife is going to kill me" he says to no one in particular as Summer smirks obnoxiously in background. Yes, that's lame, but at least I TRIED to make the premise funny. And I've never even been to Africa or Ohio.
You know that Tombat thought this one up while he was sitting on his plane staring out the window while they loaded the baggage. "Hey! Wouldn't it be funny if…?" and so on. The sad thing is, it rarely turns out that way.
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I'm surprised that Summer opened Dan's duffel bag and didn't find one of Les' yearbooks in it. Just think how that could have stretched things out! Les would dominate the campfire conversation. Not that he won't try anyway.
Good thing, too, that while rifling through a stranger's luggage Summer didn't come across, oh, I dunno, a fetish maid costume or a stack of 8mm stag films.
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Between Les and the stowaway cat, it will be interesting to see which one is the first pussy to reach the top of the mountain.
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Jeffcoat – Well that automatically rules out Summer.
HEY-OH!
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Beanie — Ha! I forgot there was a "lady" present!
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Don't look now but that's Le Chat du Mort. Death cat, as we know it. Somebody's in for a good croakin'.
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It's no surprise to me that TB would invent a phrase like "debagging the feline". After all, who knows d-bagging better than him?
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Well, at least Dan didn't pull out a copy of Lisa's story – yet.
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Jeffcoat Wayne
July 5, 2012 at 3:50 am
Between Les and the stowaway cat, it will be interesting to see which one is the first pussy to reach the top of the mountain.
I nominate this for CotW
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Soooo…..like….whatever happened to courtesy??
How about – "It sounds like it's in here! – Mind if I check it out?"
NOPE! Not today….not in BatShit's Africa…..Sum'Mo just dives head-first straight into a complete strangers personal belongings…..
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Oh, please let this be a baby panther separated from it's mother who's nearby!!!!!
On another note anyone think this guy "Dan" is going to be Batiuk's sacrificial lamb for tragedy here?
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Would have been much funnier and no less probable if Dan's infant had stowed away in the bag instead.
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OT, but anybody read "Gil Thorp" today? I'm hoping Masky McDeath makes an appearance. It's been almost five years since we last saw him.
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Is it me, or does Dan look disturbingly look like Rudy from season one of "Survivor?"
TFH sez: On the next SoSF: The Real Dan
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I decided I would re-do yesterday's strip. I'm posting it today in honor of Tom Batiuk's ability with continuity.
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