"A pair of socks? You shouldn't have. No, really: you shouldn't have." Funky gleefully presents his contribution to Les' arduous endeavor. Good idea keeping the slip, though. I'm sure that if Les doesn't make it to the summit, the store will be only too happy to give you a full refund for a pair of used, dirty, unpackaged socks.
Nice jaw-line there in panel one, Nerdlinger. Socks? Really? A fifty year old man bought his fifty year old pal a pair of socks? Uhhhhh, OK, Tom. I have to assume that if Funky doesn't appear at least once a month the title of the strip is required to change or something. This is pretty goddamn senseless otherwise.
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I think a pair of socks could have been awesome, if they were made of fists and delivered to Les' jaw.
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What the WHAT?? Who returns stinky socks that have already been worn??? The only way I can describe Bat Hack's attempts at humor over the past few days is to suggest this is how one might write after a couple weeks of constant sleep deprivation. Or at the very least, he woke up at 3:30 in the morning, wrote this incomprehensible dreck, then was back in bed by 3:35.
I mean, lame jokes are one thing. Making no goddam sense is yet another. Seriously, this "writing" sucks.
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Les with the Jon Gruden crotch shot in panel 3.
Really TB? Ugh.
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I wonder if this is a case of product placement advertising. If so, the marketing department at Summit Socks needs to be fired.
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Um, wow. I didn't think it was possible, but you managed to be a bigger asshole than Les Moore for a moment there, Funky. Congratulations, I guess.
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Some of these strips are so dull they are impervious to snark. Mission accomplished, I guess.
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Speaking of false optimism, Les, you want to close your legs there in Panel 3? If Funky's goal was to give Les something to cover that up, I think anklets would be the better way to go.
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Does Les ever thank someone who has done something nice for him?
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whys porch chain coming out of Funkys forehead ?
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Les: "Wait, Funky…before you go, take a photo of me."
Funky: "As a gag?"
Les: "No, for Cayla. She'll be missing me while I'm gone, right?"
Funky: "…er…well…"
Les: "So I want her to have an "inspirational image" of me to help assuage her loneliness. Yes, take one of me as I am now…my legs splayed out so wide it looks like I'm about to snap a hamstring, my completely non-existent package on display…"
Funky: "Oh GAWD. Les!"
Les: "Don't hate me because I'm beautiful in a nonsexual way, Funky. No, photograph my perfection. The part in my hair, gouged into my scalp. My teeny little lipless mouth. The perfectly smooth crotch. NOW, capture it now!"
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Talk about paying homage! First, Funky presents The Great One with the gift of foot underwear. Then he brings his eager mouth within inches of The Great One's spread-eagle crotch! My, that is just….
Haarrrffffff!!!
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To quote MST3K "Honey put your knees together…Please" From Red Zone Cuba.
"I kept the receipt." The hell? What is he expecting? Summer to come and tell him: "Sorry Funky Les died before he reached the summit. Here are the socks. He never wore them." I mean this is weird beyond weird folks. We haven't even gotten to the mountain and Batuik is losing control of the narrative.
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You know, there's something of a pattern here to Funky's gift-giving:
Anniversary – dinner at Montoni's.
Father's Day – burger at the Mall.
Les climbing mountain – pair of socks.
Let's extrapolate…
Cory's graduation – key to the handcuffs.
Crazy Harry's birthday – two pencil erasers.
Bull's birthday – an America OnLine sign-up CD.
Wife's birthday – copy of People magazine (stolen from dentist office).
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BeckoningChasm, he already gave the two pencil erasers to Summer for her birthday.
{self-satisfied smirk}
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Charles, I acknowledge your smirk-fu. You are the master!
So…hm. How about a bottle of after-shave lotion (originally received as a gift six years before). Scent: banana peppers. Four years after the expiration date, however, scent is…unclassified. Perhaps the subject of a Ridley Scott movie.
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Can't take much more of Les' phony self-deprecation concerning his ability to climb what is probably the most heavily-visited tourist site on the African continent. No matter how hard Batiuk tries to make Les look like a dork, he still can't help depicting him as the bull ape Marty Stu of Westview whom we're supposed to worship and admire as much as Batiuk does.
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Maybe Funky is telling Les that he thinks this sorry excuse for a human being won't even make the trip. He'll be holed up at the Ramada while Summer sets a new record for ascending the peak.
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Too bad that stupid mountain isn't an active volcano. I'd like to see those two asshats summit that.
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Is that Funky? That doesn't even look like Funky…
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Yeah, socks are a pretty cheesy gift, and the Summit brand didn't even score any PUNchline points, but it sure beats Crazy's pages-stuck- together Tarzan mags and Bull's "gift" of bad training. Wonder what Mr and Mrs Blondie McSmirkface will give him, other than an empty refrigerator, a $700 electric bill, and a sink full of dishes upon their return.
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