Black and White and Red All Over

SosofDavidO here, taking the reins for a week or two!

Wow, Cindy, who knew your fiancee’s movie would include a romantic interlude! Here in today’s strip We see Cindy’s fuming face in full black and white as she tries to cope with “the other woman.”

Hey, be glad, Cindy, this is the PG-13 era of the 2000s and not the early 80s, where action movies were almost all R-Rated and were so not only for insane violence but for topless female shower scenes and sexual situations that seemed to go on FOREVER, especially if you were an uncomfortable 13 year old boy watching these movies with your parents in the room.



Filed under Son of Stuck Funky

18 responses to “Black and White and Red All Over

  1. Epicus Doomus

    As I rambled about yesterday, IMO TomBan is enjoying this “Cindy is a seething cauldron of white-hot jealous rage and insecure lust” story just a tad too much. It’s actually becoming uncomfortable now, uncomfortable in a decidedly unwholesome way. And, even worse, the sad fact that Cindy will only continue to age means it might be quite some time before BatHack snaps out of this peculiar and overly-revealing premise of his, which means it could get a whole lot more icky before it gets, uh…”better”.

  2. This need of his to hammer home how ‘unnatural’ someone like Cindy would be stopped being funny or nice to see long before this and, yeah, it’s only going to get worse. The need to be thought of as being worthy of love and attention is eating away at her intelligence, morals and dignity at a frightening pace and it’s never going to stop until she goes full Norma Dismal.

  3. Black and white? Cindy is having a fantasy in which she’s the Wronged Woman in a postwar film noir story. She’ll picture herself in a vicious rage as she shoots the other woman and her unfaithful lover. Gunfire, blood, police, and then she snaps out of it as Marianne offers her a cup of coffee. Cindy meekly accepts, because along with being a vain, jealous shrew, she’s spineless. Funny how Batiuk found her so attractive in high school.

  4. Chyron HR

    Does Cindy actually understand what acting is?

  5. I think this must be a fantasy sequence. Aside from that, I read the arc as a poor attempt at replicating one of those chauvinistic tropes of sitcoms from the 60s that gradually went away in the post Mary Tyler Moore era.

  6. HeyItsDave

    The storyline is stupid and contrived, but at least T-Bats is drawing Marianne Winters as fairly attractive instead of the cropped-hair mannekin he was scribbling way back when Cindy first started Facebook-stalking her.

  7. This dialogue is a good example of why most movies hire qualified union writers, instead of comic book hacks from Miseryville, Ohio.

  8. I’m betting that as soon as Cindy met Marianne, she fainted, and everything since then is all a dream. Because now that I think about it, someone as obsessed as Cindy would know exactly how old Marianne Winters is, probably down to the second, the moment she knew Winters was attached to the film..

  9. 1. If this breaks out into a catfight on the set, I’ll take back some of the things I’ve said about Batiuk…

    2. So is Cindy still supposed to be interviewing Cliffe Angere? Or was that just a bullshit excuse to spy on Masone?

    3. I see Cindy is a believer in the Kirk Cameron school of “Things your actor spouse isn’t allowed to do during a movie shoot, and under the eyes of God”

    4. Nice to see that after two years and 58 rewrites, the dialogue from SadSack Petey’s script is just as rich, witty and vibrant as anything on AFI’s top 100 list… I’m almost surprised Ms. Moon didn’t say “Once you go black (and white), you never go back!”

    5. Thanks to Cindy’s fuckwittery, the only roles Masone will be getting after this are sequels to “Brokeback Mountain”… Yet she’ll still find a way to be insanely jealous when Masone has to get an open-mouth kiss from Chiwetel Ejiofor, won’t she? (At least this role will give Masone a fighting chance at the Oscar he’s coveted…)

  10. billytheskink

    Masone: How many times does Starbuck Jones’ full name appear in the script?
    Mopey Pete: Um… Every other line.
    Masone: That’s not enough!
    Mr. Director: Were you two planning on discussing any of this with me?
    Masone: Shut up old man, I could buy and sell you!

  11. @TheDiva: And why actors have very limited say in hiring crew…

    I still want to know how a studio lets an actor fire the original script team just to hire a random dude sight unseen solely from a secondhand recommendation from the woman Masone happened to be fucking at the time (and her recommendation strictly came from two minutes of a phone call she was casually eavesdropping on at Montoni’s)

  12. Hitorque

    6. Meanwhile, over in the real universe, it’s getting out over at TMZ and Perez Hilton what at hysterical, hyper-jealous bitch Masone’s fiancee is being to his costar, and both celebrity gossip Twitter and comic geek Twitter are going apeshit…

    7. So at what point does Cindy demand that Mopey Pete insert a new character in the script (played by her, of course) in some half assed way to do battle and reinforce her supposed love for Masone? And with all the other bullshit that has gone on, don’t tell me for a second that this isn’t plausible for Batiuk…

  13. What would make #7 funny would be if Pete wrote her in as Cliff Anger’s space wife. IE, an old person.

  14. Professor Fate

    Notice that Mopey Pete shares with his creator a nack for writing dialogue that no human being would ever say.
    And is this a movie inside Cindys head? She does understand this is acting. Granted Richard Burton and Elizabeth Taylor became an item while filming Cleopatra while married to other people but it did not happen their first day of shooting together.

  15. Why is she even on set?!

  16. Cindy is on the set because the studio is too cheap to hire good security. And now we’re in Cindy’s fantasy sequence where she gets revenge on her unfaithful fiancé and her rival, so don’t expect anything to make sense. Just hope Batiuk doesn’t drag it out longer than he did with the Pirates of Pencilzance.

  17. spacemanspiff85

    This is just reinforcing my belief that Batiuk’s never actually spoken to a woman.

  18. Charles

    Yeah, I think the only way this could be saved is if Batiuk went completely over the top with it.

    But Cindy shouldn’t be pissed with Marianne. After all, it’s just what Marianne does. It would be like condemning water for being wet, or a scorpion for stinging things. She should instead be pissed with Mopey Pete, who only has that job because she got it for him. He’d be unemployed hanging out at Montoni’s with all the other losers if it weren’t for her, and this is how he repays her, but constantly inserting scenes where her boyfriend is sucking face with a beautiful woman. She should rage against Mopey and demand that all the makeout scenes immediately be replaced with scenes where Starbuck shakes Jupiter’s hand instead. “Just doing my job, ma’am.”

    BTW, wasn’t Marianne supposed to be some huge get for this production? Why isn’t there some enormous hush surrounding her as everyone’s in awe?

    Also, (there’s always an also regarding something completely unrelated) Cindy’s there to do a story about Cliff Anger, but Cliff was only supposed to be a cameo appearance. This means that he almost certainly finished his involvement in under a day. Why is he still hanging around the set several months after his cameo was shot?