Bad enough that we witnessed Les getting frisky last week. Today we are forced to contemplate the silhouette of a naked Les Moore in the shower, triggering uncomfortable flashbacks to Kevin Spacey’s opening scene from American Beauty.
26 thoughts on “Shower Scene”
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Son of Stuck Funky 
This will go a little OT. I don’t think of myself as much of a snarker, as I am someone that truly wished the comics were better. I come here to read the comments but rarely – RARELY – check out FW because it is depressing for myself to see how far it has fallen from being a decent little strip from the 70s. So, with that in mind, here are the comic strips that I would not mind if they went away for good:
FUNKY WINKERBEAN – how do you go from a pleasant – if a little bland – comic strip about high school students and totally fuck it up and retcon it beyond all recognition? How do well loved characters go to become absolutely hated? This is the mark of a creator of a strip that desperately needs to retire the strip, or turn it over to someone that can bring it back to its former glory.
9 CHICKWEED LANE: How this comic strip creator hates his audience and holds them in contempt. Big words, tee hee sexuality, and morbeus strip long story lines about hand fucking. He calls anyone that dare criticize his “art” a beefwit, yet he is only in 60 newspaper markets. If someone hates the public so, why continue doing what you are doing?
SINFEST: Once upon a time a really funny, thoughtful comic strip. Then about the time the character Fuschia left the Devil’s manor, everything became so damn serious. One wonders if the artist’ girlfriend threatened to leave him if he didn’t start to do a feminist storyline – because that is all the damn comic strip has become – a focal point story arc for the characters of THE SISTERHOOD. Has this artist been taking pointers from Batiuk for depressing shit?
GET FUZZY: At one time a mildy entertaining strip which has fallen into the trap of getting into a hell of a rut. Bringing in more bizarre animal characters does not mask the fact that 99% of the strip takes place in a really boring apartment with a cat character that should have the shit beaten repeatably out of it. The character of Rob is a masochist.
Where’s Norman Bates when you need him?
That thing in panel two.. please tell me that’s Les’s face I’m looking at.
Cayla: “It’s not even Saturday night: if you’re going to bathe more than once a week, that’s going to bust our budget.”
What’s Cayla worried about… she’s already spent her share on that nose job.
So she’s gone from WOWing over a fat check to pinching pennies on a water bill. Crack that p-whip, Crayola!
“Git yo’ bony nekkid white ass out da shower! Water ain’t free, sucka! You eatin’ into my profits, boy! Work on yo’ dam script somewhere where it don’t cost nuthin’. In fact, yo’ muhfuggin computer is runnin’ up da lectric bill! Now get y’ass to work befo’ I go free safety on yo’ lilly white backside again!”
“Lisa’s Story 3: Die Slow With A Vengeance”.
Blech. This one should come with a warning of some kind. So he’s going for “laughs” again this week, flogging the “writer’s block/Cayla & the movie money” routine for all it’s worth. I thought he might take us on a detour to sepia-toned Lisa-Land but I guess he’s saving that for Comics Sweeps Week or whatever (chortle).
Too bad Les doesn’t think better while soaking in a nice warm bath with a plugged-in toaster resting precariously on a flimsy shelf above. And geez Cayla, you might want to tone down the constant money-grubbing, lest you spoil your image as a good-natured doormat-slash-Lisa approved replacement wife.
@Rembrandt36, I never liked “Get Fuzzy” and I’m not familiar with “Sinfest” and “The Sisterhood” so I can’t really comment on them. As for “Funky Winkerbean”, “9 Chickweed Lane”, and I’ll throw in “For Better or For Worse” I feel the authors suffer from what I call the Woody Allen Syndrome. Basically despite being loved and good at their craft they wanted to be seen as serious writers and got out of their depth. Many creative people seem to forget that The Dramatic Masks show both tragedy and comedy as equals. As much as I miss “Calvin and Hobbes” and “The Far Side”, Mr. Watterson and Mr. Larson may have shown more wisdom by quitting when they did than staying too long at the party.
No, Tom, it’s only funny if we can see his cutoff jeans when he’s crying in the shower.
Les has writer’s block over something that has already written. Let that sink in a minute. Editing and adapting something you have written should not be causing this much anxiety, unless Les is finally realizing that he’s making money of his late wife’s death. Or maybe Les is realizing he doesn’t have any clue how to write a screenplay, a much different genre than – what is his genre, non-fiction tripe? Either of those options would actually be interesting. Instead, it’s just Batiuk returning to his beloved “writing is hard and writers get writer’s block and writers procrastinate, ha ha.” Yawn.
Faithful readers (or half of them, anyway) of Rex Morgan and Judge Parker are occasionally rewarded with June in her underwear or Neddy feeling chilly. Faithful readers of Funky Winkerbean are rewarded with Les taking a shower.
Speaking of other strips, Luann has recently had some narrative movement. It seems to be the result of Greg Evans’ getting his daughter to co-write the strip. Given she’s apparently the inspiration for the character Luann, that may be encouraging. Given that she is a forty-something woman writing high school students, and an offspring taking over a legacy strip, maybe not so encouraging.
Helskor, this has been a banner week for Neddy fans. As for FW, yesterday’s Oscar fantasy was kind of amusing, and I empathize with the procrastination angle, but somehow I think the rest of the story arc will play out unnaturally, i.e. somehow Les will miraculously produce a grade-A screenplay draft in record time and we’ll proceed to the “Evil Hollywood rips apart Les’s work” arc.
@Chyron HR, nice Arrested Development reference. Infinitely more funny than this pile of junk.
And, my, Cayla has zoomed past the “we like you because you hate Less too” into the “wow, what a miserable person” category, hasn’t she?
All of a sudden i just want Batiuk to go for the trifecta. Maybe Funky has to design a new menu, and we spend the next two weeks watching as he struggles to write down his pizza descriptions.
Well, damn Cayla. You were the one that didn’t want to get romantic earlier. You can’t complain now about Les spending too much time in the shower!
I can’t believe I’m giving so much thought to this screenplay by Less, but here’s the thing I don’t understand (let me add I have great respect for people and their families dealing with cancer, or those who have lost someone from cancer, heck, my mother is a cancer surviver!):
1. At this point, for a movie to be developed about someone dying from cancer, there has to be a “hook” to the story, but with Less, what would make this story interesting to Hollywood? It’s not like we’re talking about someone famous, or an unique story, or even dealing with likable people — both Less & Lisa were/are loads to deal with. So why is this being produced as a movie? Less is so self-centered, that I wonder if there’s any mention of Summer in the book or movie? Now that would be an interesting movie, how Summer, as a young teen-ager, dealt with the loss of her mother, and now has a self-centered dick of a father to raise her. No wonder she blew off Cayla & Less when they came to visit her at the greatest college in the universe.
2. The interaction between NotLisa & Less is scary; why did these two get married? Once NotLisa heard about $$$ she’s been kicking Less’ butt, and giving him a sex lockdown…. this is normal to Batcrazy???? WTF?????
3. I never want to see another panel where I have to think about Less naked, puke!
REE REE REE REE
At least thanks to Batiuk’s poor drawing skill, we don’t get a good silhouette, complete with spindly legs and a sunken chest.
Whatever happened to that Montoni’s pizza app, anyway?
Whatever happened to that Montoni’s pizza app, anyway?
Boy Lisa also had writer’s block.
Not writing this to bash on Batiuk, but can anyone find a point to today’s strip? Is this supposed to be his new focus, Les constantly having problems getting started? Is the story helped at all by seeing Les in a shower? And wouldn’t Cayla have gotten used to his writing habits by now? How long have they been married?
My own submission to the list of many, many brilliant LISA’S STORY trailers-
Lisa Moore is at the doctor’s office, looking at her chart. Her jaw drops, her eyes widen.
LISA: “S-switched? What do you MEAN, switched?”
(COMING SOON TO LIFETIME)
Lisa Moore is running back and forth through the big box store, grabbing hapless salespeople by the collar and shaking them.
LISA: “VHS TAPES! For the love of GAWD, where are your DAMN VHS TAPES?!?”
SALESPERSON: “Um, it’s 2007, lady. We stopped selling those three years ago.”
Lisa: “AAAAAAAAAUGH!”
(FROM THE WRITER OF LISA’S STORY & AN UNPUBLISHED BOOK ABOUT JOHN DARLING-)
Les Moore and Lisa Moore are setting up an ancient, outdated video camera, recording over countless boxes of ancient, dodgy tapes of TJ HOOKER and RESCUE 911 episodes.
LISA: “The wig! For the love of GAWD, where is the WIG?!?”
LES: “You’re wearing it already.”
LISA: “Oh.”
(COMES THE STORY OF A WOMAN WHO MADE SURE HER FAMILY, FRIENDS, VAGUE ACQUAINTENCES, ENEMIES, AND PIZZA PLACE WOULD NEVER FORGET HER-)
Lisa is wearing the wig, sitting in a little room, directly beneath a glaring lamp. It casts dark shadows, making her face look weird, her every expression resembling a bloated smirk.
Lisa: “Hi, Summer! This one is for your 87th Christmas without me! That’s right, no matter how old you get, you’ll ALWAYS have one of these tapes to pop in and think about how I’m not there! Isn’t it tragic?”
*Knock-Knock*
(Summer’s voice): “Mommy? Where are you?”
Lisa: “Mommy is BUSY, sweetie!”
(LISA’S STORY- MOSTLY ABOUT THE TAPES.)
“Writer’s block” has long been an ongoing FW theme and, based on the actual content of the strip itself, it’s easy to see why this is so.
I don’t see this whole movie thing ever leading anywhere even slightly interesting. Rock-bottom expectations are the name of the game in the Funkyverse. I’m guessing the end-game here is, at best, a big viewing party at Montoni’s, maybe with Les getting to appear in the film as an extra or something. And even that premise seems far, far too ambitious for a FW arc.
The first time Tom Batuik used cancer as a one of his crises du jour, one of my oldest friends was dying of cancer. And that story line went dead until years later when he decided to resurrect it for his self-aggrandizement. And now he brings it up again in his typically fatuous way on the week another of my friends went into hospice to ride it out. Tom Batuik can. Kiss. My. Ass.
—9 CHICKWEED LANE: How this comic strip creator hates his audience and holds them in contempt. Big words, tee hee sexuality, and morbeus strip long story lines about hand fucking. He calls anyone that dare criticize his “art” a beefwit, yet he is only in 60 newspaper markets. If someone hates the public so, why continue doing what you are doing?–
If you think 9CL is bad check out his other strip Pibgorn. It makes 9CL look subtle by comparison.