Tag Archives: Flash Freeman

Or You Could Just Die, Either Or

Link To Today’s Thing

Once again BatHole’s vast “writing” ineptitude is on full display. If you were reading the events of this story in novel form you’d have laughed and casually tossed it into the fireplace already, just to spare yourself the embarrassment of having it in your home. So just like that this Flash guy is leaving? Does he work there or was he just brought in specifically to wish Pete well with his new job? It’s such a weird and inexplicable tangent, all for a really sad and pitiful payoff too.

“Hello, Flash? This is Chester Hagglemore. I own a new comic book company based on Batom Comics. Do you remember the ol’ Eaton Building where you used to work? Well, I bought it and…”

“What? Hello? (buttons on keypad being pressed)”

“Mr. Flash, I bought that building and one of my employees is a big fan of your old work and I thought…”

“What? Hello? Who’s this now? Comic books?”

“Yes sir, I was wondering if you’d let me stash you in the building to surprise this Pete fellow, it’d really mean a lot to him and…”

“Hello? Brady Wentworth, now THERE was a REAL SCUMBAG! Still OWES ME MONEY!! Hello?”

(phone rustling noises, yelling)

“This is Mr Flash’s nurse. You’ll have to call him back, the “Diagnosis: Murder” with Tim Conway and Harvey Korman is on. After dinner is fine, say 3:15 or so.”

I mean come on. And Pete has been in the comic book game for years now, while being flattered by McFlashowitz’s praise is all well and good that grotesque star-struck look on his face is way out of proportion with the events that just took place.

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The Consequences Of Choosing Your Heroes Poorly

Link To Today’s Nightmare

Pete sums up both this arc and the entirety of FW’s run in panel three. Stop. It was all a big mistake.

Obviously Pete is distraught upon discovering that his main influence and life-long idol came up with the bulk of his ideas while hitting up the early bird over at the Sizzler. Or maybe he’s just stunned to learn of foods other than pizza. Or maybe he’s just upset because Flash’s frank admission confirms what he’s secretly known about himself all along, which is that writing comic books isn’t that hard and his entire life up to this point has been a total fraud. It’s difficult to tell and the weird faces everyone’s always making do not help.

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A Bitter Phil To Wallow

Link To Today’s Strip

Yes, I’m back again to continue SoSF’s wall-to-wall coverage of The Great Atomik Komix Mega-Arc of 2018. Apparently The Author has finally snapped and/or decided to devote the remainder of FW’s two hundred year run to one specific longform story. Unfortunately, it’s this one.

Last week’s bizarre tangent completely out of nowhere introduced us to Flash McFlashington or whatever his name is and now we’re seemingly in for a solid week of old-fashioned “back in the day” comic book banter, which is the second-worst possible FW outcome. In today’s installment, they all gang up on the since-deceased Phil Holt in wry and somewhat cruel fashion.

What does Flash (ugh I hate that so much already) mean by “in” a hostile work environment? Is it just me or shouldn’t it have been “Phil Holt in his studio WAS a hostile work environment” because that was him…a guy who was bitter about having to draw comic books for a living? Or does he mean that the work environment itself was somehow hostile toward Phil, like he suffered some sort of horrible workplace abuses there?

Just kidding, of course it was one of those dumb FW grammar flubs that slip into the dialog from time to time and nothing more. The (guffaw) QC people really should have caught that, bet someone got fired for that blunder.

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Batty Batom Baloney

Welp, turns out the Batom Bullpen is actually BS, as Chester learns in today’s strip. Six panels of explanation about how working at Batom Comics in the 1950s was just like Pete and Durwood’s fever dreams and one panel of Chester getting the vapors after learning that Pete and Durwood’s fever dreams were true to life. It’s… it’s almost like we’ve seen all of this actually drawn and didn’t need any of this exposition.

Poor, poor Holtron has to witness this whole sad, sad scene.

And with that, the skink is out until next time. $10 sez this story arc is going to continue uninterrupted until my next turn at the wheel.

No takers?

None?

Yeah, I don’t blame ya.

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Starstruck Jones

Well, at least today’s strip doesn’t contain any Wayne’s World shtick so fantastically lame and over exposed that it took me hours to recognize it, like yesterday’s did… The gag is still extremely rote, though. Could we at least get a “Mr. Freeman is my father” bit? I actually kind of like that old groaner.

According to the official “Untold History” of Batom Comics, Flash Freeman created Starbuck Jones as an adult in 1954. He looks pretty good for 136.

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Why, just why?-day, April 20

Today’s strip was not available preview, so it is time to dive into the archives to find answers to the questions that YOU, the loyal and hearty SOSF readers, want to know!

Today’s question comes from B.D. Idenitpicker from Picher, Oklahoma.

When did Pete get those bags under his eyes? Was he born with them?

The answer, obviously, is yes. Pete’s eye bags were visible on ultrasound. But, I know you all are here for archival evidence, so lets see some, shall we?

FW9-2-98
Here’s Pete’s first appearance in the fall of 1998 and… what? No bags? Or are Pete’s eye bags all we see here around his nose, not his eyes themselves? I subscribe to the latter theory.

FW9-4-98
Pete’s bags are on clear display in this strip, where much-missed Act II arsonist Mooch Myers takes Durwood’s property with no intention of returning it. I would like to see more of this, actually.

FW9-10-98
Pete’s bags grew considerably here in this strip, where he creepily pines for his best friend’s future wife.

FW9-11-98
And they grow further still when talking about his parent’s divorce, because Act II was all about EVERYONE having a personal raincloud.

There you have it, sports fans. Pete has never gotten enough sleep, or learned about antihistamines. Until next time, keep sending in those post cards!

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