This doesn’t quite seem to be how normal people would react to someone randomly returning from the dead. (I know it’s a waste of time expecting people to act normal in this strip, but still). I absolutely believe that if someone in the Batiukverse did spontaneously, inexplicably return from the dead, the first thing they would do would be seek out the nearest comic convention and ruin an event honoring someone else.
Boy, is Les going to be pissed with Lisa shows up and ruins the Lisa’s Legacy Run this year.
Tag Archives: cellphone
Return of the Phil
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Everyone Knows It’s Wendy
Six days of Ruby telling of her struggle as a woman in the male-dominated golden/silver age of comics. Then Mindy shares some hurtful online comments that she’s received, and even Ruby, who’s seen it all, is taken aback. The plot is just starting to move into “contemporary issues affecting young adults in a thought-provoking and sensitive manner” territory. But hey, it’s the Sunday following a Mindy and Ruby week, which means we get a Wayback Wendy Sideways Sunday Comic Cover.
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Comment Allez-vous
It’s Memorial Day, and I’m gonna invoke my privilege here and just throw out today’s link for you all to pick apart. Thanks for reading and have a safe and enjoyable Saturday.
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This is the farmer sowing his corn
Good grief, look at that word zeppelin in panel one.
This the dolt who made the call
To schedule the audition
To fill the position
To be the organist
Down at the church that Tom built.
Presumably Harriet was right there the whole time and knows what was going on; of course, given the writing in this strip I’m surprised she didn’t repeat his words verbatim in her panel five frog-face. After all, she outlined all his other accomplishments and (of course) concluded that he was the best thing evar. In probably the fastest 180 I’ve ever seen.
The reason being, this entire episode is Tom Batiuk publicly patting himself on the back. “Look at this terrific character I created! Is this award-winning or what?”
As mentioned yesterday, unless this church has a single Sunday service, Dinkle will be spending a lot of time there. Most churches I’m familiar with have several Sunday services, a couple on Saturday and at least one every weekday. Let’s not even bring up holidays. That’s going to cut into a lot of Dinkle’s other activities. (Come to think, how does Lillian manage to run her bookstore? Answer: it’s magic. Dark magic.)
All of which promises what could be could be an interesting twist: what if Dinkle failed the audition? I think it would be the first time in the strip when he didn’t get everything he wanted. It might humble him and make for a rounder character.
And of course it will never happen. The strip is now total wish-fulfillment and trivial observations. Where every “hero” character is Superman.
And with that, I am out of here. Please welcome the always erudite and entertaining Epicus Doomus who will be your host for the next couple of weeks. Exit, stage left!
Filed under Son of Stuck Funky
I Wish He’d DisAPPear
I’m going to ignore the “haha, apps are confusing mystical objects that nobody can understand” “humor” here and just focus on Becky. What in the world is her expression about? The raised eyebrows and smirk look more seductive/romantic than anything else (although in the second panel she looks eerily like Pete and Summer, because for some reason only three or four face types exist in this strip). And honestly, if it was revealed that Dinkle and Becky were actually having an affair, it would vastly improve the logic of this strip. Because “deaf band director who retired decades ago is constantly shadowing the current band director for no real reason” is stupid. It was the same thing with Linda and Buck. I think it’s a sign of bad writing when totally unintended subtexts actually make more sense than the actual plot.
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Always Enjoyable?
Oh goodie! I get a Dinkle arc. Having to scrape together some kind of humor or commentary for Dinkel arcs is ‘always enjoyable.’ But it gets tedious trying to remember everything that has happened to Dinkle in Act III that has slowly morphed him from a unique and bombastic caricature of a passionate band director into just another bland, smug, Westview Pod Person.
Please note, while Dinkle claims that teaching piano is ‘always enjoyable’ he doesn’t look like he’s enjoying it today, and…spoilers…he doesn’t seem to enjoy it all week long. Maybe in Westview the words ‘always’ or ‘enjoyable’ mean something very different than what’s listed in the dictonary?
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Patience Zero
Today’s strip is filler. Total filler. In fact, it is possibly the filleriest filler that ever filled four panel borders. Filler filler filler filler…
The idiocy of Winkerbeans here is wearing the same clothes they were back before Wally and Amicus visited Adeela in jail, so it is presumably the same night/day that Adeela was arrested and President Clinton was called. Why are they all so resigned? Just how quickly do these people think Federal agencies work? And they expect a call back from Mr. Clinton himself, assuming failure when that doesn’t happen within an hour? Between yesterday’s strip and this one, there is probably a long list of right-leaning organizations that have more trust in the Clintons than these five.
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The Westview Pizza-ccord
This guy still doesn’t look anything like Bill Clinton, but at least he’s game to help the gang in today’s strip, which means we’re probably closer to the end of this idiocy (and the start of a new idiocy). A President Clinton junk food joke? Really, TB? Did you write this in 1994 or when people stopped laughing at the thought of the President eating French fries (which was 1995, I believe)?
Filed under Son of Stuck Funky
Hey I once met you, and this is crazy… but here’s my number, so call me, Funky.
Holly’s persistence pays off in today’s strip… or does it?
Yes, the 27 (or 37) year old phone number for President Clinton that Funky has still works, and his call has been received by a cell phone that recognizes Funky’s personal cell phone as Montoni’s! It must be the same brand as Wally’s magic Adeela-recognizing phone. But the man answering it, unfortunately, is not the former President.
Look, I dunno if this guy is Durwood 40 years in the future or maybe James Woods after a horrible accident involving a beaker or two of acid or the world’s most embarrassing caricature of the late Jerry Orbach or if Ayers just forgot what Flash Freeman looks like… but I do know he’s not Bill Clinton.
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Getting the runaround
Did you know President Bill Clinton likes to jog? I sure didn’t, at least not until today’s strip… and when I say “today’s strip”, I mean “when he was first elected President”. Does TB think calling him “President Clinton” is not enough of an identifier for readers or did he just recently start watching a DVD box set of 1990s Saturday Night Live episodes?
What’s with all the Eeyores in the first panel? Funky just dialed up BILL CLINTON on a whim, got the former POTUS to answer directly, and was told by the man himself that he would help. Why is Rachel even questioning this?
Better yet, why am I questioning this? Any of this? It’s been a fool’s errand for decades.
48 Comments
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Tagged as 1/4 inch from reality, Adeela, Amicus Breef, An idiocy of Winkerbeans, cell phones, cellphone, delusional fantasies, deportation, enraging hair strands, exercise, Falling leaves, Funky, Funky Winkerbean, half-assed political commentary, Holly, hoodie, how things are NEVER done, immigration, leaves, Life is a dismal horror from which you can never escape, melting faces, mistaken identity, Montoni's, Montoni's logo, Montoni's T shirt, not how the world works, Now Funky, President Clinton, Rachel, sad-sackery, sheer idiocy, stupid, tags you never thought you'd use, technology, terrible artwork, the raptor claw in Holly's hair, this is all a horrible mistake, Wally, you have got to be f-ing kidding me