Tag Archives: Jessica

Sloppy Second Place.

Link to Today’s Comic.

So Tom at least realized that is would be beyond crass to have ‘Lisa’s Story’ WIN the award. We’ve learned something about the lines he will and wont cross.

But when you thought the plotline couldn’t get any weirder or more half-assed, we don’t get to see the announcing of the award, or the immediate reaction. We jump from before the award being announced to some time following later.

I would hate to be Tom’s wife, the man has trouble experiencing a climax. Everything is foreplay to him, followed by a blackout and then an awkward denouement. Since his massive Atomic Komix startup saga tapered off even his foreplay has been perfunctory. Perhaps we are entering the era of endless quickies, shorter and shorter storylines eventually turning the strip back into the one shot comic it once was.

Panel One: Cayla hands her ‘Honey’ divorce papers.
Panel Two: Les drinks while being insulted by an imaginary cat.
Panel Three: Les asks out an attractive woman at a book fair.

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Whistling Dicksie

Link to Today’s Comic.

Well Darin and Jess are already drunk, and are hanging all over each other like two kids necking at the back of the old Valentine Theatre. Jess has lost a finger. In fact all the hands are extra hideous today. And Cayla is missing a neck. What a treat!

Les has absolutely no grounds to be ashamed of a friend making a scene, but it’s nice to see him miserable anyway.

Something I had never really noticed until I was examining the last panel is how the Funkyverse house art style generally doesn’t include lip tint. Normally it doesn’t stand out. But Jess today, with fully detailed lips, really should have them colored nice and pink or red, as would befit a lady at an awards show. instead she has a terrifying flesh colored pucker on her face, like she has an asshole for a mouth.

Cayla has an asshole for a mouth too. But his name is Les.

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Self-Defrecating Humor.

Link to Today’s Comic.

Today’s strip is merely an inverse retread of yesterday’s strip, and commenting about Les being an insufferable twit has become an exhausting refrain. So instead some notes on the art.

In Panel one Cayla has a gross lobster hand deformity and seems to be putting her finger directly into her drink, no doubt slipping herself a mickey.

Darin and Jess have identical poses and smiles, which REALLY ups the creep factor between the two of them. Are we sure they’re not actually half-siblings? I wouldn’t put a little statutory indiscretion beyond Jess’s father, the talk show host, John Darling, who was murdered. Lisa could have been paid off to pin the deed on some jerk she got blackout drunk. Explains how she afforded law school.

Darin’s jacket is the same color as Cayla’s skin. I’m sure a Freshman Social Sciences major could write a seven page paper about the subtle metaphor of white male privilege clothing and protecting itself with by adopting the exterior trappings, the skin, of persecuted classes of society. But I think the colorist just was really really lazy today and only used six colors.

In the last panel, Les’ massive hand couldn’t really be attached to either shoulder as drawn. Instead it seems to extend directly from his crotch, pointing upward. A huge, disgusting, awards erection.

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Wry or Twee? That is the Question.

Link to Today’s Comic.

Today’s strip was also not available for preview, but if it isn’t an painfully unfunny normie vs nerd joke I’ll be very surprised.

Beckoning Chasm had an interesting thought yesterday, that I wanted to examine further and get your opinion on:

“Two years ago, I would have bet money that Les would lose the award to something obviously lightweight and brainless (and popular). It would give Les a chance to bemoan how works of depth and subtlety are never rewarded for their excellence.

Now that the strip has gone full-on wish-fulfillment, I honestly would not be surprised to see him win.”

This strip used to be an endless parade of failure, but in the last few years it has more unwarranted rewards than Judge Parker, with a few medical issues tossed in now and then to remain ‘topical’. So what does the StuckFunky Commentatorverse think? Does Dead St. Lisa get the prize?

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What a rip-off

Today’s strip is the second Sunday strip in a row to involve the word “rip”. Be sure to buy next Sunday’s coupon and circular delivery system at you local newsstand just to see how TB works Rip Taylor and Rip Torn into Funky Winkerbean.

Jessica now joins the long line of comic book characters based on real people, ranking among the likes of Funky Flashman and Brick Springhorn and the 10th Avenue Band. What an honor.

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Slackerday, June 30

Today’s strip was not available preview, because Comics Kingdom’s strip uploading person has been taking cues from Pete and Durwood and put their duties off until the very last minute.

These two have been procrastinating for decades now. Here’s a scene from back in high school where Durwood has shirked his duties at the school paper in order to have kissy time time with Jessica. Pete, Sophomoric Sightings‘ alleged writer (and now artist) tries to lollygag by claiming he forgot how to write until Chien lights a fire under his rear end.

Funky Winkerbean-2006.09

Chester ought to look into hiring Chien. I’ll bet there would be fewer offsite coffeshop breaks if he did.

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A Math-etic Loser

Today’s strip poses the question: Is Durwood a talented artist who truly struggles with math, a gigantic tool, or some combination of the previous two things?

His MBA degree, depicted “artistic” skill, and his development of the Montoni’s app suggest the second of the three options.

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