Tag Archives: Chester

Fade Away And Radiation

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His insurance company? “Hello, I recently had to spend over $48 on buying back some radioactive isotopes I accidentally mailed to a bunch of strangers without their knowledge. Does my policy cover that? There’s no need for that language, ma’am”.

And this “buy back”??? How’d THAT go? Everyone just readily agreed to sell their rings back to Chester no questions asked? Sure, Tom, sure.

“Uh, hello, JoeTheSoSFSnarker? I’m Mr. Doomus with SoSF. How are you today? Good, good. Listen, remember that free Les Moore cocoa mug we sent to our most loyal snarkers a few days back?”

“Yeah, it’s out on my deck. It repels insects for some reason. I should have killed you and your entire family for sending me that thing, you jerk. What of it?”

“Well I kinda sorta need it back, like really bad.”

“Oh, do ya? Why exactly? Oh look, it says right here that the paint on that mug is a lethal carcinogen! I’m suing you!”

“Sigh.”

Premise 5x + one line resolution + weak wordplay wrap-up = another week crossed off the calendar. It wasn’t really that bad of a premise but, as usual, it was just completely squandered. I wonder how long he’s been waiting to zip that “umbrella policy” gag in there? Bet you he’s used it before, too.

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Stepping Away From The Box Might Be A Good Start

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Well, it isn’t the worst idea Pete’s ever had, that’s for damn sure. While FW has long been hailed for being the very first comic strip to incorporate radiation into its stories, it’s refreshing to see it being used for laughs for a change. At long last Batom has harnessed the mighty power of the atom to generate comedy instead of using it to generate those annual puff-piece interviews in the Akron Daily Bugle Sunday supplement. Although “comedy” might be overstating things a bit.

I do like how Chester is apparently leaning on the potentially deadly box, absorbing its mysterious powers in a desperate attempt to do whatever a marketing team and legal department would do. If the casualties are limited to these four nitwits, no harm done.

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Or Perhaps The Mice Just Have Higher Standards

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Boy Lisa – Science Guy. This arc reminds me a bit of TB’s hilarious take on Three Mile Island that ran back in 1980. You see, Les was weaker than usual and having a heck of a time climbing the rope in gym class. One thing led to another and it turned out that Montoni’s pizza cheese was sourced from a dairy farm outside of Harrisburg PA and, well, you really had to be there at the time to fully appreciate the hilarity.

Anyhow, the three imbeciles are still dithering about, making annoying confused faces, serving up useless information and accomplishing nothing, which is also the entire history of FW in a nutshell. It is slightly more informative than the usual daily FW strips, I suppose, but not a whole hell of a lot.

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Atomik Flushes

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Oh…the HILARITY!!! Has ANY daily comic strip featured radiation as much as FW has? And here I thought those wavy lines emanating from the strip were just plain old stink lines. Chester has apparently unwittingly killed AK’s entire fan base, which as I mentioned yesterday could be a pretty funny premise if only someone else was writing it. As boring as he is this TomBan guy is one seriously sick puppy, as many have previously mentioned “everyone gets cancer” is basically his dream arc and here we are, actually living it!

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Total Recoil

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So, as everyone immediately ascertained yesterday, Chester’s idiotic rings are radioactive. Now I would think that sending Atomik Komix readers deadly poison through the mail would be considered something of a public service but apparently these jerks aren’t nearly as cynical as I am, so there’s going to be a recall, followed by lots of lawsuits and federal government involvement, which sounds pretty funny on paper but won’t be in Batiuk’s hands. But, of course, you already knew that.

Coming soon: the gang can’t figure out why their official “Rip Tide-Scuba Cop” miniature compressed air scuba tanks are so popular until it’s determined that they’re actually full of nitrous oxide, which explains Rip’s popularity on the summer jam band circuit.

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Atomic Pile

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One of (one of) the worst things about being a daily FW reader is waiting for Monday’s new strip to drop, then seeing Pete and Boy Lisa’s boring tiresome old mugs again. So Chester actually purchased nuclear waste, which means his staggering lack of business aptitude was already firmly in place long before he exposed himself to massive levels of comic book ring radiation. Maybe this will play out like in the comic books BanTom adores so much and Chester will develop superpowers, like the ability to ruin a comic strip, hog the limelight for years at a stretch and have someone write a maudlin best-seller about him…but if history is any indication he’s gonna have to have a baby first.

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Woman-upmanship

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Oooh, that is some next level pouting going on in panel two. I can’t wait for an in depth story examining Pete’s and Mindy’s characters, their relationship, and the universal conflict between ego and charitable love. I just know Batiuk will really dig into Pete’s psyche, his insecurities, and use the weakness he’s intentionally built into his character to display the uncomfortable truth to all of us that the joy we get from outshining our peers will always be at war with the joy we get from seeing our friends succeed.

I mean, this can’t just be a few strips of mild petty annoyance on Pete’s part, only to be blandly brushed aside with a weak platitude and immediately ignored to be followed up by something even more passive…right? RIGHT?!

Mindy in panel one looks uncomfortably like some kind of Japanese caricature. And let us never ever get an up-the-nostril shot of Chester ever again, okay?

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