Tag Archives: comic books

There You Go Again

Leaving meaningless oil paintings behind in the dilapidated shacks that they deserve to be housed in, today’s strip brings us back to art’s purest and most meaningful form and in its most hallowed of temples…

Well no wonder DSH couldn’t cover his rent back in 2010, he hates the actual function of his business. That 2010 story seems especially relevant to this one, as Funky covered DSH’s rent (and some of his own expenses) by doing exactly what DSH had apparently been failing to do, sell comic books. Now we know that he can hardly bear to part with the things that his business is supposed to part with.

I do not recall this “McKenzie Collection” but I assume it has something to do with Crankshaft’s elderly neighbor. I’d try to track down more info but I’m researched out right now, sorry.

Thanks for sticking with us through the last month, which included a couple of the most asinine and one of the funkiest strangest weeks in recent Funky memory. Sosf David O will be your driver starting next week, and should do a better job steering around the potholes than I did… and there WILL be p(l)otholes.

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Hardboiled Volk

Today’s strip tells us literally the same thing that Friday’s strip did. Marianne’s fate will remain a mystery for another day… that day quite possibly being Christmas Day. We are in color again, but I’m not quite getting that infomercial tonal shift feeling I described a few days back.

I feel it my duty to point out that a story about an actress who is driven to suicide (possibly) by cyberbullies is not “hardboiled” It’s pretty much the exact opposite of hardboiled, actually. It can be many other things: sad, appalling, educational (or in TB’s hands: implausible, maudlin, and preachy), but a word meaning “tough, cynical, unsentimental” as hardboiled does? No.

Us beady-eyed nitpickers may notice that Tom Lyle’s signature offers additional proof that TB works a year ahead, not that we really needed it.

lylesignature

You can see the conception of this comic book cover on the official Funky Winkerbean blog

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Dopes on a Rope

You know what’s not really funny? Piracy. Not like “Download a bad copy of Secret Life of Pets” type piracy but actual open seas piracy. I’m guessing the Chinese know how to deal with the menace. One little blast of a firehose in today’s strip and these two are fish food.

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We got The Bleat

Were you all worried we would go an entire week without a reference to comic books?
Well, fear not true believers! Today’s strip brings us back to that which makes the heart of Westview pump. “Comic books, comic books, comic books”… the beat hauntingly comes through the stethoscope.

The power of comic books is so great that Bernie doesn’t even need to go through the interview process that Maris and Logan did in order to join the staff of “the Bleat”. He’s in simply because he wants to review movies and comic books and believes he can score free comics from DC and Marvel by being a critic on a closed-circuit high school announcements broadcast (good luck with that, because it doesn’t happen… period).

I am curious about two things, though:
First, Marvel and DC but not Mega Comics? Bernie is, after all, a known fan of their signature property, The Amazing Mister Sponge.

Second, what is Les’ problem here? He left these two schmucks to do his job for him and now he wants to gripe about the results?  Gimme a break. “I left these teenagers without direction or supervision and now they are pursuing their interests, oh they are so terrible at all aspects of life. If only there was a place where they could learn things and people there who could teach them…”
Maybe he’s just mad that they have clearly learned more from Bull than they have from him. Specifically, they want to score free stuff, which is Bull’s primary motivation in life.

And finally, after all of this exposition, Bernie had darn well better review the Starbuck Jones movie when it comes out… provided he hasn’t graduated by then of course.

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A Homage To That Which Never Was

Link To Today’s Strip

Anyone who didn’t see one of these comic books covers coming, please pay more attention going forward. I only know what this is because I (hangs head in shame) regularly check out the official Batom Comics…er, I mean FW blog. Without going into way too much detail, blah blah blah comic books comic books comic books. That’s really all you need to know to be “up to speed”, as it were.

Are we looking at modern-day Pete and Boy Lisa here or their retro counterparts again? I guess the bow ties indicate “retro” but who really knows? “Charlie and Chuck” is another one of his fanciful fictional funny books and yes, it has a whole convoluted back story behind it too. Apparently “theft” is the theme here, as retro Pete and Boy Lisa are still bemoaning how they lost the rights to Starbuck Jones right before the (sigh) point in its retconned history when it really took off. Even his fantasies are miserable.

A propeller beanie AND a slingshot in the back pocket…where’s his Lone Ranger mask and Dick Tracy wristwatch? Too bad this creativity never finds its way into his daily strips, one gets the impression that THOSE obligations are really cutting into his vivid world of make-believe. Nothing’s happened in FW in almost a decade, yet the world of Batom Comics is exploding with all sorts of history and new characters. Go figure.

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Page Kept A Scrollin’ All Night Long

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Link To Today’s Strip

Wow, it’s one of the rarest FW daily strips of them all, a sideways vertical memory within a fantasy within a fantasy! You don’t see these very often. After reading about the Superman trademark saga, I wouldn’t say that “tragic” is the first word that springs to mind. But then again, my entire being doesn’t revolve exclusively around nostalgic comic book memories, so what the hell do I know? I bet you that whenever he starts with this story while he’s hanging out at that pizza place, everyone politely excuses themselves to hit the bathroom.

Again, one has to wonder why despite being armed with this information, retro Pete opted to sign over the SJ title anyway, but thinking about it ruins the premise, which is apparently that the Superman creators got hosed. What that has to do with FW, Starbuck Jones or anything else is a mystery to me, but apparently it still has Batiuk all worked up, so here we are. It goes to figure that he keeps coming back to that story, as we all know that “writing” for a living is a horrible thankless task that never pays off no matter how great you are at it.

It might have made a little more sense if he held off on this (chortle) idea until they finished the movie, then had them lamenting the money the producers were making off their work. I said “might”. But BanTom simply doesn’t do things that way, or in any kind of a coherent way, really. He just does them, that’s all. Like with all of his cockamamie little stories, not one single aspect of this arc made any sense at all, on any level. I wouldn’t be surprised to learn that he wrote this one in his sleep, jotting down various fevered comic book dreams on a little notepad next to the bed then waking up and immediately committing them to paper as is.

 

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A Hole (Where My Comic Book Shop Used To Be)

Link To Today’s Strip

That’s right FW readers, on “his way” to work at the Korner, Harry routinely passes by yet another comic book shop, “The Black Hole” owned and operated by “Nick The Geek”. I am assuming that Crazy must be taking the long way to work or something. Anyhow, the two morons lament the state of the comic book business, make a stupid comic book reference and (zzzzzzzzz). You’ve seen it all before, over and over again. And something tells me it won’t be the last time either.

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