Whee, more patented, beloved Tom Batiuk Women Talking About Their Relationship Humor. Can we please get back to Les being smug or whiney? Or Dinkle typing at a computer?
Here’s a fun tidbit that I really hope I’m not the only one who noticed: Cindy’s cleavage has been featured in 4/6 of this week’s strips. I have to imagine Batiuk included that in his notes to the artist: “Make sure you showcase her nice boobs”. And yet she’s going on and on again about how lucky she is to find Mason, despite the fact that she’s a successful attractive woman who looks thirty years younger than she actually is. Those are literally the only two character traits Cindy has “I’m a hag whose beauty has faded” and “I’m so lucky a man finds me attractive”.
I also notice how the art has made sure to showcase Cindy’s “sexiness” this week (despite how it conflicts with the dialogue of her mourning her faded beauty) but not Cayla’s. I thought that was odd at first, since Cayla is Les’s Wife and you’d think she’d be drawn as the prettiest woman ever, because Les deserves nothing less (humor!) but then remembered she’s Secondary Wife and can’t look better than Lisa.
Oh, joy. More character development for Cindy. Of course, being the Hot Blonde model of female in this strip, there is basically nothing to her character apart from obsession over how attractive men find her (the other model of female is Frumpy Potato-Nose). Good job, Tom Batiuk. Honestly this strip would’ve been better off being totally wordless and just putting a little more effort into drawing a pretty, scenic nighttime beach scene. Of course, the writing took zero effort.
Beyond just finding it hard to believe Cindy couldn’t get a date for New Year’s Eve, I think the really hard to believe thing is that she had literally nothing better to do than hang out with Les. Like, did she not have homework to do? Were there no walls to stare at? Could she not sleep?
I could be wrong, but this really does seem like more chemistry going on in today’s strip than anything portrayed between Les and Cayla. Cayla just showed up out of the blue and started throwing herself at Les for literally no rational reason, and he only deigned to pick her when Susan bowed out and Cayla won by default.
Oh, wait, the joke is that Batiuk knows two classes of ships? Oh. Ha.
Oh, yay. The “did they/didn’t they” romantic drama of our time is finally over, after one whole day of tension. Thank you, Batiuk. I thought for sure the rest of the week would be filled with horrible misunderstood phrases like “Les bought an extra-large!” where Cayla would assume Cindy meant condoms and the Official Tom Batiuk Lame Photo Album Flashback Panel would show it was an extra-large root beer.
And what is Caylay’s sigh of relief about? She once commented wryly on Les crying out Lisa’s name during “intimate moments” with her, so I would think she’d have zero problem with Les being with someone else.
Oh, yay. Just what this strip needed. Les Moore-centric sexual jealousy. It’s like Batiuk thought “Oh, so people don’t like Les? They’re tired of Lisa’s Story: The Movie: Redux? I’ll show them! I’ll have a woman fretting and worrying about Les sleeping with someone hotter than her! I’ll force everyone to think about Les Moore’s sex life! Finally, I will have my revenge on the world that wronged me! All will suffer!” And then he cackles for ten minutes.
This is dumb and bad on so many levels. If Cayla seriously thinks the most popular girl in school slept with Les, she’s out of her mind. I mean she obviously already is, since she’s sleeping with and married to Les, but this is a whole other level. Also, given his creepy obsession with high school and blonde high schoolers, I guarantee Les would introduce himself to everyone he meets by saying “I’m Les Moore! Cindy Summers once slept with me!”. And then probably bring it up in literally every conversation thereafter.
Oh, yay. More Les and Mason and Lisa’s story. And what’s this twist? The womenfolk are wandering off into the darkness while their men handle the real business? Wow, Cayla’s talking a lot, I’m sure it’s funny and/or insightful. Oh, wait. She’s just saying Les is unsure about this? I had no idea. I think Batiuk should spend five more days repeating that point without adding any humor or advancing the “plot” a bit. What are the odds that’s exactly what’s going to happen?
I hope against all hope that today’s strip marks the end of this chapter of Les Goes To Hollywood And Gets All Pissy- Part II, particularly for the sake of our own spacemanspiff, who has to write up the next two weeks of strips. Trying to come up with words to describe this horror is not a task I would wish on my worst enemy… or even Tom Batiuk.
On the emptiest beach in California, Masone engages in some criminal activity that doubles as the dumbest cult ritual this side of the Lisa’s Legacy Run. Not one aspect of this stupid movie project has moved forward since October despite the fact that four weeks worth of strips have been expended covering the inactivity.
Not even the prospect of s’mores improves things, which is terribly sad.