Mason uses humor in an attempt to calm Cindy’s doubts about their May-September romance. It really is the sort of wisecrack that a guy might make to his sweetheart in real life. It just comes off as a little flippant, given that we’ve spent the better part of the last month watching a woman who married a widower having the riot act read to her via video by the dead first wife.
19 thoughts on “Cindy-rella”
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Son of Stuck Funky 
The lesson here: you cannot ever be “too wry” for a Westviewian.
Again, it’s a nice strip. It’s so rare to see nice things happen to these characters (except Les, who deserves no happiness) that it makes me wonder what kind of horrific event is going to tear these two apart. I’m sure that a) it’s a doozy and b) it’ll be really lame.
“I’ve finally found a Les of my own!”
“A nice, younger woman.”
If there were anyone else on the beach who heard Mason Jarr The Movie Actor Who Has A Rusty Nail in His Hand say that to the ridiculously young Cindy, they would be calling the cops and accusing him of pedophilia.
Either Mason is saying that he’s going to dump her for a younger woman, or that he expects her to die soon so he can get a trophy wife. Either way, it comes off as a bit less sweet than intended.
These ballcaps are killing me. Did Mason and Cindy rob Fred McGriff’s hat closet?
Maybe I’m bitter about this unrealistic storyline arc for additional reasons; after all, my ex-girlfriend just got married to someone else about two weeks ago. And it’s a bitterness I keep to myself because I never defriended my ex on Facebook… so I got all the lovey-gushy posts and pictures. Ugghhh.
If this arc is going the way I think it’s going, I’m going to have to drive down to Batiuk’s Medina studio and confiscate every single one of his Funky Felt Tips®.
Wait… so when Cindy dies, Mason is going to look for a younger woman instead of writing “Cindy’s Story” and bemoaning his tragic loss for the next 20 years? My kind of guy!
This really is a nice strip and story arc. Let’s hope it continues.
And when you’re gone, I’ll find somebody else?
Does he mean “gone,” as if they’re going to break up?
Or “gone” as if she’s going to die before him?
Either way, no justification for a passionate kiss after that statement .
MASON JARR, HE’S A HOLLYWOOD STAR. WITH THE LEAST SEXY name anybody could imagine a Hollywood star would have.
My aunts pickle okra and beets in mason jars.
Way to go Battic, writing is spot on.
This is lovely, isn’t it? She digs that he’s as shallow, crass and essentially thoughtless and stupid as she is. At this point, I expect the cast of MST3K to show up and start chanting “END! END!”
Wow. REALLY? In real life, a woman would have the sense to slap someone who says things like that. Why are the women in this strip so stereotypical AND totally desperate for the affections of these sleazy guys? I mean, I’m no raging feminist, but I do have my limits! 😡
It’s so cute when folks think a Funky Winkerbean arc is going to be “nice.” You optimists, you! This is Westview! Well, actually, it’s Santa Monica, but you know what I mean. This is Funky Winkerbean, and we’re about to embark upon the hunting of the—no, not the snark—the Pulitzer.
I think usually I give this strip the benefit of the doubt when others bag on it, but I can’t join the lovefest. It’s always about death, which apparently is an aphrodisiac to Westview women.
@billytheskink: Nice catch with the hats. Maybe Mason Jarr is auditioning for the next Tom Emansky video.
FW: Wait, that analogy makes no sense whatsoever…Mason is Cindy’s last chance, while Mason’s celeb status will keep a supermodel on his arm even in his mid-70s…Mason is essentially saying “Yeah, we’re cool right now, and the age difference doesn’t matter since I can drop your ass like an anvil anytime and pull a couple of fresh, tight, talented replacements from the Playboy Mansion!” Yeah Cindy, you certainly found the right one…
FW 2: Before I go any further, WHY IN FUCK’S NAME IS MASON SITTING ON A BEACH WITH A THUMB UP HIS ASS INSTEAD OF WORKING ON HIS BIG-BUDGET MOVIE THAT’S ALREADY A YEAR LATE AND $150 MILLION OVER BUDGET??
FW 3: Only Cindy would think Mason’s words are endearing because she’s even more shallow and vapid than he is. At least this kills the notion that this relationship has anything to do with love – Mason is Cindy’s “You may be middle aged and lacking in self-respect but you’re still a hottie” –trophy, and I’m betting dollars to yen that Cindy is a dead ringer for Mason’s mom (mercifully Batiuk isn’t sick enough to explore that storyline).
FW 4: Funny how Mason has been a part of the strip this long, and we still know jack shit about him – No development whatsoever. We know that Mason Jarr: 1. Has leading man looks, but the intellectual maturity of a child, 2. Drives a Porsche Carrera GT, 3. Is from the small town Midwest, 4. Is a shitty actor since he gets stage fright for table reads, 5. Has complete autonomy on the Starbuck Jones project, with the ability to override the director, producer, studio, and all common sense.
FW 5: Even though it has already been said, I’m always amazed at the pathological ability of Westview characters to make everything about *them*, regardless of what’s going on around them (Of course Les is the grand master of this, followed closely by Lisa who’s still barking orders from beyond the grave)… Cindy is chilling on a SoCal beach, fucking an A-list actor, has a new job (if it can be called that), and she STILL is so filled with doubt that any man would find a 54-but-looks-27 woman sexy, despite the fact that they have been fucking for months already…GMAFB…
This…actually isn’t a bad strip. It’s not funny or anything but it is at least a little bit more poignant than the “Lisa speaks from the grave” strips we had a week ago.
I think a big reason this strip works a little better is that Mason Jarr isn’t a character we despise or hate. He seems an OK guy. Amazing what having a likeable protangonist can do for your strip, huh?
Also it helps that these people don’t look like the overweight, decrepit husks of humanity we tend to see in this strip.
It’s For Better For Worse level poignancy, but I’ll take it.
Didn’t Cindy used to be married to Funky? How long do we reckon it’ll be before Mason is passed out on a street corner on New Years Eve? Then comes the premature grey, mail pattern baldness, and don’t forget the BPH “Yes…” Thinks’s Cindy, “Another man to suck youth and verve out of.”
This is Hollywood. Mason is going to turn out to be married. Or Mason is going to do a Bruce Jenner and announce that he is transitioning into a woman. Forcing Cindy into having to decide whether or not she wants to be a lesbian
Why are the women in this strip so stereotypical AND totally desperate for the affections of these sleazy guys?
I think Cindy’s not really the focus of what Batiuk is doing here. I think this is part of a greater story about the wonderful, simple and humble community of Westview, Ohio. I think he’s doing the whole insecurity thing with the hot aging chick to make her sympathetic. That he’s failing at that and just making her pathetic is beside the point. Up until fairly recently Cindy was the stereotypical beautiful cheerleader who never had time for you. Now she’s being humanized.
And the reason he’s doing that is for the larger point of aggrandizing Westview and its greatest generation of Les, Funky et al. Cindy’s the hot chick, and she’s hot enough that an A-list celebrity is not out of her league. She humbly thinks that he might be, but he’s been reassuring her all this week that, no, he’s really not. And I think the fact that it’s Cindy and not, say, college-age cheerleading captain Rana, or young vital Division I college athlete Summer (bleh) is pretty essential. Cindy is Les’s generation. Rana and Summer are not, even though apparently the age difference with Mason would be no more problematic in that situation. Cindy’s generation can still bring it, baby. They were so exceptional that the hot chick can bag an A-list celebrity. There’s nothing they can’t do. There’s nothing that’s beyond them or their capabilities.
But look at it from a wider perspective. Les was called in to Hollywood to help write a script of his book. When Hollywood’s prevailing wisdom went away from Les’s conception, it failed horribly. When a big budget superhero movie is floundering and needs a new scriptwriter, in comes Pete Rustengoofennoofen from Westview to save the project. And he brings his cool friend Darin from the glorious hometown to help with the direction (Let’s not kid ourselves that Darin is just there to draw pictures entirely at the direction of someone else. He’s going to have some discretion). And this presumably saves the multi-million dollar project that Hollywood couldn’t crack itself.
I bet Batiuk’s kicking himself for hooking Les up with that nonentity black lady, when he could have had Les pair up with an A-list actress, who, if you remember, was desperately trying to curry his favor when he wasn’t sleeping on the job in Hollywood. He did the next best thing though, which is to make Les the A-list actor’s best friend. And show that the A-list actor isn’t above Westview by having him hook up with the town’s unmarried hot chick, despite the fact that she’s well past her prime and much older than him. It’s very simply aggrandizing the simple small town that he’s created. No one is better than them. They’re just so special and humble and live their lives so perfectly. They are the ne plus ultra of humanity.