Oh hello Mr. Stock Male Nerd Cartoon #27 from 10,000 Clip Art Images ’98 CD-ROM (OS/2 Edition), glad you could make it to today’s strip. If you hadn’t shown up, Pete and Durwood might have had to twiddle their thumbs, and we all know how much they hate slacking off…
Y’know what’s really nerdy? Math! Let’s do some math. Lessee, it’s early May, so we’ll say Atomik Komix most recent issues were published in April. Here’s their titles that we know of and when we first see them “published”.
The Inedible Pulp – May 2018
Rip Tide: Scuba Cop – July 2018
Atomic Ape – September 2018
The Scorch – January 2019
Assuming one issue per month for each title, there would be 33 issues. Assuming a once every two months schedule there would be 17 issues.
The Inedible Pulp – 12 issues/6 issues
Rip Tide: Scuba Cop – 10 issues/5 issues
Atomic Ape – 8 issues/4 issues
The Scorch – 3 issues/2 issues
No math involving this strip or story arc equals entertainment.
I know what you’re thinking, “How can today’s strip be any worse than this past week?”
Les. The most dreaded name in the newspaper. The name that even alone evokes the most dire of thoughts. “Les” is the sound that a rattlesnake makes before it dies in a brush fire. It’s the Florida State Police code word for a sinkhole. It was the name of Francisco Franco’s pet canary. It is far and away the worst part of the title of Les Miserables.
I don’t know what possessed this poor poor child to wander near Les’ table, but I do know that if he winds up reading Lisa’s Story he is not going put it down disappointed that only one person dies. No, he’s just going to think that the wrong person dies. And he would, of course, be right.
Devoid of context, today’s strip is aimless and boring. With context, though, it’s… ummmm… I don’t really know. What is the context of this strip anyways?
We have no idea how this exchange began, unless it began like this, which means “Batton Thomas” just started spouting off trivial comic book history once Bernie and Thatsnought where within earshot. Is this what TB does at book signings and conventions?
And today’s strip is on from insulting Flash Freeman to… this… whatever this is is supposed to be.
I get the self-referential bit, of course, but what is its purpose? Is this lamenting the declining popularity of newspaper comics in the most confusing way possible? (maybe) Is this based on TB’s experience being ignored at real life comic convention functions? (definitely) What is Thatsnought’s reference to “the original guy who did that strip” all about? (probably nothing)
And Three O’Clock High? Is that supposed to be a stand in for Funky Winkerbean? Just Act I Funky Winkerbean? TB’s first published comic strip (the anti-Archie) Rapping Around?
Is it an intentional reference to the lightly-remembered 80s teen comedy of the same name that starred the guy who played the 3D glasses-wearing guy from Biff Tannen’s gang in Back To The Future? (unclear)
Whatever it is… it stinks. (apologies to Jay Sherman)
Today’s strip deserves all the oys, head shakes, groans, and boos that it gets. Even Durwood’s attempt at lampshading joins in the dopey wordplay (and I use that term in the loosest possible sense).
I’m not sure what is more remarkable, that Pete and Durwood exhausted their creative energy and all they could come up with is a gender-swapped Human Torch or that Mindy is sure a gender-swapped Human Torch is THE THING that female comic readers have been waiting for.
The power is out again at Atomik Komix in today’s strip?! Oh no! That means we have to read a comic about the power being out again…
There is a lot in this strip, and it will make your head hurt if you actually think about any of it. So please don’t, that is the burden I have chosen to bear this week.
Is Atomik Comix in such dire financial straights that Chester didn’t pay the electric bill? Was it because he couldn’t part with any more of his gardening catalog collection?
If the electricity in the old Batom Comics building is so unreliable that it goes out weekly…
– Why doesn’t Chester move his 3 employees to a few hundred square feet of space in one of Cleveland’s many affordable, functional, and maintained office buildings?
– Why is there no generator or other back-up plan to maintain power?
– How does this building pass city inspection? Even Cleveland has standards.
Why doesn’t Mindy know what to do? Not one week ago, she met a deadline while working from a coffee shop.
How does Mindy not know what Dr. Martin’s is? Yeah, I get that the average person doesn’t know what it is (which really weakens the Dr. Martins=Doc Martens joke) but she is paid for her apparent artistic talent and she’s never used physical ink or been into an art supply store?
Does Chester really think that ink he found in a box of unused supplies from Batom Comics is still usable for professional-quality work? For reference Batom Comics shut down in 1972.
How does Durwood’s face manage to get even longer?
There, I’ve though about all of that for you. I have determined that there are no satisfactory answers and that this whole story arc is asinine, so don’t even think you need to worry about it. Carry on and have a nice Saturday.