Tag Archives: Hollywood

In a Funk

Today’s strip was, of course, unavailable for preview.

But please, let us discuss poor Funky. When was the last time Funky had an arc that wasn’t pointless filler? There is hardly a character in EITHER Funkyverse strips that is stagnant as this poor lump.

If the arc is dealing with something bordering serious, Funky is the world’s most passive protagonist, reacting to events outside his control and doing what other people tell him to. Alternatively he serves as the distributor of jobs, food, and apartments to whoever wanders by needing them like some kind of slapshod Greek god rising from a rickety machine to fix ‘conflicts’ in a piss poor drama.

If Funky is going to show any initiative of his own, it is to chase down a pizza box monster.

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Bravo, Mason, Bravo

Link To Today’s

Yes, Les, please don’t talk. You know what would be useful before you spend half the day meeting with Hollywood executives? If you discussed your plan with your partner beforehand, so they’re not openly angry and baffled constantly, and you don’t look like squabbling children in front of the people you’re trying to impress.

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The Hook is She Dies

today’s strip

If you told me Batiuk was somehow writing this crap without even noticing what he was writing, I would totally believe you. Who, after being told the movie was about someone dying of cancer, would ask what the hook is and if there’s a good twist? She dies. That’s the hook, for some reason. What’s supposed to hook you in is watching someone die. And the twist is that she dies.

And Mason’s responses have nothing to do with Cass’s question. Darin wasn’t a twist or a hook, he was a boring time wasting plot device to add more melodrama. And “testifying before Congress” is neither a hook nor a twist

And how many more days of Mason being smarmy for some reason and Les being annoyed are we going to get? I know the answer is “far too many”. It’s funny how after years of being presented as just the coolest actor ever all of a sudden Mason is a Hollywood jackass, for some reason.

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So They Got Drinks After All

today’s strip
Les with his hands where nobody can see them, staring silently at a blonde woman. What else is new?
Really though, what is the point of this strip? Someone expresses condolences to Les, and he stares into space sullenly and silently? Are we supposed to think she’s silly for saying she’s sorry? Is the point that “sorry” isn’t enough, and she should be weeping and rending her clothes at Les’s feet.
You know what I love in this situation? If Cass’s next lines were “I lost my husband to cancer. And also my children.”. Take that, Les.

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If Only, Les, If Only

Link To Today’s Strip

Um, Les, that doesn’t really address her question at all. She didn’t ask if you wanted sparkling water, she asked if you wanted a drink. There are many, many other drinks than sparkling water. It really wouldn’t surprise if Batiuk constructed the past two weeks just so he could use “sparking water-boarded” as a punchline.

I do like how even though she says it’s nice to meet Les, Cassidy Kerr is not actually touching him. Her face in the third panel seriously disturbs me, though.

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Chateau Boring

Link To Today’s Strip

I am scared by what “Pink Entertainment” could possibly be. In the real world it would undoubtedly be an adult film studio, but there’s no way this strip would ever be that interesting. Among the many things I dislike about Batiuk’s writing, his tendency to name drop Hollywood restaurants and hotels is pretty high up there. I’m pretty sure he’s mentioned Chateau Marmont before. I’m sure he thinks it’s adding realism to his comic, and maybe fifty years ago that would’ve worked, but now anybody can search for a Hollywood restaurant name in ten seconds, so it’s not really impressive anymore.

Who do you think Les is so excited to see? My money is the guy who reads the obituaries on the nightly news, because of course in the Batiukverse that would be a thing, and it would be the highlight of Les’s day.

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China Hates Lisa

today’s strip

Man, that Les face in the first panel is priceless.  Poor, poor Les.  Being forced to have a movie made of Lisa’s Story.  If only he could say no.  Which he could, of course, but won’t, because he’s a whiny child.  A whiny child who called his wife up to whine about the travesty being done to the memory of his dead wife.  Which, if it’s not the world’s story, then why did he publish it in a book as “Lisa’s Story”, exactly?  

This really is Les at his most insufferable.  I have an extremely hard time believing that even Batiuk thinks Les is sympathetic or at all likeable, but apparently he does.

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