Tag Archives: giant mouths

by billytheskink | May 24, 2022 · 10:30 pm

Dick and Mortar

Our own newagepalimpsest called it yesterday… but we can’t be assigning blame for the reappearance of him. For one thing, we all know TB works a year in advance (note the reference to a graduation ceremony from “two years ago” in today’s strip). For another, reading this strip always carries a risk of appearances by him or Dinkle, regardless of the context.

I know we were all hoping he was not out loathing people on a book tour or a Hollywood something… but nope, he‘s loathing people here at the graduation ceremony. At least he‘s observing rather than participating (as the faculty often do), so I guess it could be worse.

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Tagged as 1/4 inch from reality, Anon-O-Character, anon-o-character with oddly-shaped head, Anon-O-Characters, Anon-O-Dork, anon-o-students, bearded dick with ears, Cayla, clueless students, giant mouths, half-assed political commentary, high school, LBD, Les, Les being a giant smug douche, Les' Slob-ass Tie, Les. Cayla, Life is a dismal horror from which you can never escape, random students, token black student, Westview H.S., Westview High School, WHS

by billytheskink | March 17, 2022 · 10:30 pm

Keep Circulating The Tapes

I suppose it was inevitable… but I had a fleeting thought that we might escape this arc without anyone bringing up the Lisa tapes. Alas, today’s strip has happened. It was a silly thought, really.

Wait, all ~~Les~~ Cayla sent to Marianne was two videocassettes? (apparently) Didn’t Les ask Cayla to send DVDs of Lisa’s tapes? (yes) But didn’t Les also have all of his Lisa tapes on display on the very shelf he just placed Marianne’s Oscar on? (also, yes) But didn’t Crazy convert all of the Lisa tapes to “digital” (and DVD) years ago, negating the need to send any physical media at all? (again, yes) But didn’t the conversion process require Crazy to bake (and likely ruin) the tapes because of their fragility and deterioration? (it did) Beyond that, why is she only returning these tapes to Les now instead of through a delivery company or at the movie wrap party? (because TB has panels to fill)

I suppose the real question here is, did Lisa make a tape about what to do in the event that an actress won an Oscar for playing her in a major motion picture? That might explain why Marianne wound up giving her Oscar away… everyone obeys the Lisa tapes! Sic semper videocassetta!

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Tagged as Academy Awards, awards, cancer films, cancer movie, enraging hair strands, giant mouths, hatchet face, insufferability, Les, Les being a giant smug douche, Les' blue sweatshirt, Lies!, Lisa's Story Movie, Lisa's Story-The Movie, Marianne, Marianne Winters, obsolete video technologies, oddly muted squiggly lines, Oscar, Oscars, rewarding the worst, silly awards, smug inept bearded jerks, squiggly lines, squiggly lines used to denote texture, tags you never thought you'd use, tapes, terrible ideas, the Lisa tapes, those stupid tapes, trash, unbearable smugness, unearned awards, unnatural hand gestures, VHS

by billytheskink | March 15, 2022 · 10:30 pm

Guilt blip

As our sharp-minded posters have already noted, Oscar statuettes cannot be given away or sold without first allowing the Academy the right to buy them back for $1. As such, what Marianne gives to Les and what she keeps should rightly be flopped in today’s strip.

But we’re not in reality (we’re 1/4″ away from it), so what we are left with is a false modesty competition between Marianne and Les that offers nothing we did not already know yesterday. It’s a good example of Les showing his true colors though… If Les really and truly felt guilty about taking the Oscar that Marianne is stupidly and inexplicably giving up, then he wouldn’t wait until she flew across 70% of the country to tell her. I’ll bet he also excuses himself to go to the restroom just before the check comes at a restaurant and then returns to sheepishly offer to pay the bill just as his dining companion is handing their credit card to the waiter. Cue Ben Schwartz saying the thing…

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Tagged as Academy Awards, awards, bare trees, cancer films, cancer movie, collectible garbage, comical takes on trademarked brand names he cannot use, curtains, dead tree outside window, dead trees, enraging hair strands, face-melting rage, false humility, false modesty, giant mouths, hatchet face, horrible ideas, how Les feels, how things are NEVER done, huge hands, inadequate Lisas, insufferability, insufferable assholes, Les, Les being a giant smug douche, Les' blue sweatshirt, Lisa's Story Movie, Lisa's Story-The Movie, Marianne, Marianne Winters, Netbusters, not how the world works, not how things work, Not Summer, not the way the world works, Oscar, Oscars, rewarding the worst, showbiz, silly awards, smug inept bearded jerks, smug poses, Taj Moore-hal, this is all a horrible mistake, towel curtains, trees, unbearable smugness, unearned awards, unnatural hand gestures, window

by billytheskink | March 14, 2022 · 10:30 pm

“N”, the bag

Today’s strip marks Summer’s first appearance since… oh wait, yeah, sorry, that’s (Marianne) Winters, not Summer.

Summer actually has appeared in this strip as recently as 7 weeks ago, which is not something you could often say since she graduated high school. Even so, it’s kind of remarkable that Les and Cayla have interacted more over the past few years with a now-Oscar-winning actress than they have with their own children, both of whom (still!) appear to go to Kent State… less than an hour away from where Westview is generally considered to be.

And by “remarkable” I mean 1/4 ~~inch~~ AU from reality. I think I would have found it more relatable and more entertaining had we focused instead on the adventure that must have been Marianne’s efforts to bring an Oscar stuffed in a small drawstring bag through a TSA checkpoint.

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Tagged as Academy Awards, awards, cancer films, cancer movie, Cayla, Cayla's pink shirt, Cayla's pink turtleneck, disembodied hand, enraging hair strands, giant mouths, hatchet face, hugging, Les, Les being a giant smug douche, Les' blue sweatshirt, Les. Cayla, Lisa's Story Movie, Lisa's Story-The Movie, Marianne, Marianne Winters, mouths way too low on the face, movies, not how the world works, not how things work, Not Summer, not the way the world works, Oscar, Oscars, silly awards, smirk, smirks, smug inept bearded jerks, smug poses, Taj Moore-hal, unbearable smugness, unearned awards

by billytheskink | March 12, 2022 · 10:30 pm

Clap on! Clap off!

Marianne does NOT look like someone who is willing to give away her Oscar in the first today’s strip. No, she’s looking at that Oscar the way most characters in this strip look at comic books.

The rest of this is as rote and pat as an Oscar acceptance speech can be, so let’s have some fun with another crowd shot of “famous” faces. Help me fill in the blanks and fix the mistakes where my corrective lenses deceived me.

A replicant
NO NECK JOE!
Alana Haim deserves better seats than this
Stanley Tucci on a ski trip
David Duchovny’s face
HAL 9000 putting on its best gold
Debra Jo Rupp
General U.S. Grant again
A cumulonimbus cloud
I don’t know, but her body language is appropriate
David Duchovny’s hair
Cousin It
Beldar Conehead
Hogarth Hughes
Maria, from Sesame Street
Cassidy’s sister, Alexus Kerr (see, I can do it too, TB)
Yoko Ono
Harold Lloyd (I mean, if Phil Holt is alive…)
The Chinless Contessa
Given her glare I’m guessing this is either Gretchen Gold or Cordelia Rama
Burt Reynolds (again… Phil Holt)
Jennifer Anniston’s hair
Sid, from accounting
We have General Grant, so why not Robert E. Lee too?

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Tagged as Academy Awards, Anon-O-Character, anon-o-character with oddly-shaped head, Anon-O-Characters, Anon-O-Dork, awards, awful wordplay, backs of ears, bad fictional movies, bad manners, bad movies, bad wordplay, cancer movie, Cassidy, Cassidy Kerr, China, Cindy, enraging hair strands, forehead, giant mouths, Hollywood, lame wordplay, Life is a dismal horror from which you can never escape, Lisa's Story-The Movie, Marianne, Marianne Winters, Martin Johns, Mason, Mason Jarr, Mason Jarre, Mason' Marianne, Masone Jarre, misappropriated wordplay, mouths way too low on the face, movies, Now Cindy, Oscar, Oscars, silly awards, someone who looks slightly like Owen, sub-moronic wordplay, terrible wordplay, unearned awards, ungratefulness, unnatural hand gestures, wordplay

Tag Archives: giant mouths

Dick and Mortar

Keep Circulating The Tapes

Guilt blip

“N”, the bag

Clap on! Clap off!

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