Tag Archives: insufferable assholes

by ComicBookHarriet | January 23, 2023 · 10:30 pm

Artist’s Merit

Now that we’ve cut the power to his mic and had security drag Les Moore from the stage before he could read the second chapter of Lisa’s Story aloud, we can move on with our awards presentation.

From Michelangelo carving himself lowering the body of Christ from the cross,

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Tagged as 2022 Funky Awards, 2022 wrap-up, Batton, Batton Thomas, Chuck Ayers, climate damage, Funky Awards, insufferability, insufferable assholes

by ComicBookHarriet | January 22, 2023 · 10:30 pm

Opening Ceremony

We interrupt your Frankie Pierce Expose to bring you this special presentation.

Ladies and Gentlemen and Friend Fluid people of all ages, the Son of Stuck Funky team is proud to present:

THE 2022 FUNKY WINKERBEAN AWARDS!

The 2021 Funky Awards was our first ever awards presentation, and it was a great success enjoyed by all who attended. At the closing of the 2021 Funky Awards, we supposed that Tom Batiuk had no plans to retire, and hinted that we hoped to bring you many many Funky Awards to come.

A statement, I guess, Mr. Batiuk took as a threat.

But let us not mourn the ending of Funky Winkerbean, but instead celebrate all it managed to accomplish in it’s last year.

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Filed under Son of Stuck Funky

Tagged as 2022 wrap-up, Academy Awards, being nordic, Complete Worthless Ass, Funky Awards, insufferable assholes, knowing smirks, Les, Les' blue sweatshirt, Les' Slob-ass Tie, moronic grins, mortality, smirks, smirks exchanged, smug inept bearded jerks, smug poses, unbearable smugness, unearned awards, unwarranted wry sarcasm, wry banter, wry self-deprecation, wry weary snideness, wryness

by billytheskink | November 10, 2022 · 10:30 pm

Batiuklysm

Yesterday these climage damate comics had too much testosterone… but in today’s strip Ruby is arguing that they aren’t optimistic enough. For who? For sales? For readers? For her, personally? How do you even conflate testosterone with pessimism? Is that what she’s even doing? What’s going on in her mind? What’s her motivation? Annnnnnnnnnnd, why should I care?

Flash is pretty smug about dying before the coming damate climage cataclysm occurs. I wouldn’t be if I was him. STILL drawing comic books at his age? It’s a safer bet to assume he’s immortal until proven otherwise. No one dies in the Batiukverse unless three things are satisfied:

1 – Their death is in the service of an award~~-winning~~-seeking important issue. (Okay, we can check this one, though I’m going to doubt TB has the writing chops to figure out how to kill Flash with climage damate)

2 – They are not involved in or devoted to comic books. (No check here… recall how comic book and movie serial uberschmuck Jff Murdoch survived the damate climage fire that ate Los Angeles)

3 – Their death enables Les to feel even more superior to others. (No check, again)

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Tagged as age discrimination, Atomik, Atomik Komix, Batton, Batton Thomas, boredom personified, character death, climate change, climate damage, comic books, comics, curmudgeonly oldsters, death, depression, Flash, Flash Fairfield, Flash Freeman, glasses, hope, insufferability, insufferable assholes, Life is a dismal horror from which you can never escape, melting faces, Old dying people, paper, Ruby, Ruby Lith, Ruby Lith's tiny neck-hand, seldom-seen characters wearing hats, smug poses, the inevitability of death, the inevitable death of the universe, the inevitable ravages of age, the ravages of age, unbearable smugness, unnatural hand gestures, welcoming death, why?

by billytheskink | August 19, 2022 · 10:30 pm

Credit Fraud

Today’s strip concludes (we hope and pray and hope and wish) this latest visit from the Ghost of Distress Past. Her Royal Wryness. The VHSaint herself.

Special thanks go out to Summer for being a prop with no impact on the story whatsoever, she has already collected her prize of appearing in a full 3 panel strip this week (panels will not necessarily be consecutive).
Special thanks also go out to Les for having such an insatiable ego and such milquetoast friends and family that he will continue to receive the unearned praise he has been given for decades now.
And extra special thanks go out to Crazy Harry, who demanded nothing but 18 panels of our precious time in return for his brilliant idea of pretending Isaac Asimov invented the concept of recording video using already obsolete technology.

On the subject of 18 panels (well, 16, thanks to a couple of 2 panel strips), this new Lisa tapes origin story actually takes up more column inches than the entire original origin story AND depiction of the recording of the tapes! That took just 16 panels in four strips. For all its faults, Act II got to the point…

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Tagged as Act II, Act II tragedies, cancer, cancer films, character death, collectible garbage, Crazy, Crazy Harry, death, enraging hair strands, flashback, flashback thought bubbles, ghost Lisa, hair horn, Harry, hatchet face, helmet hair, horrible ideas, ideas, idiocy, insufferable assholes, iPad, knowing smirks, leaves, Les, Les being a giant smug douche, Lisa, Not Summer, Now Crazy Harry, obsolete video technologies, porch swing, running ideas into the ground, seldom-seen characters wearing hats, sepia-tone, sepia-toned flashback, sheer idiocy, smirk, smirks, Summer, tablet, Taj Moore-hal, tapes, technology, terrible ideas, the lisa, the Lisa tapes, those stupid tapes, Tom doesn't get women, unwarranted wry sarcasm, welcoming death, wry banter, wry weary snideness, wryness

by billytheskink | August 7, 2022 · 10:30 pm

Rent-A-Fiend

Thanks TFH, enjoy your well-deserved break. You got some real stinkers… I mean, we all do, but I feel like saying that trivializes how uniquely awful each two week shift can be.

Oh, so we’re carrying Sunday’s setting over into today’s strip? Well, that’s one way to make Funky sympathetic after last week’s behavior… stick him next to Les the following week.

“Bunged up”? Is Funky continuing to morph into Crankshaft or is he suddenly a British chap with a bit of a knee allergy? Either way, Funky has apparently had the kind of knee trouble that keeps you off the tennis court for over four years (shout out to that Rick Burchett artwork). And, of course, Les got better results from tennis lessons than Funky did. Of course.

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Filed under Son of Stuck Funky

Tagged as appalling lack of sportsmanship, believable friendships, bench, crippling yet trivial injury, Funky, Funky Winkerbean, headband, imaginary friends, injuries, insufferable assholes, knowing smirks, Les, Les being a giant smug douche, Montoni's T shirt, Now Funky, park bench, smirk, smirking, smirks, smirks exchanged, smug inept bearded jerks, smug poses, sport, sports, Teachers who hated Les, Tennis, the inevitable ravages of age, the ravages of age, trees, unbearable smugness

Tag Archives: insufferable assholes

Artist’s Merit

Opening Ceremony

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Credit Fraud

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