Tag Archives: smug inept bearded jerks

Quiz Bowel

It is comics like today’s strip that remind me how good I have it. I’m not taking high school English from Les Moore. I never had to take high school English from Les Moore. It is as if he is intentionally trying to be the opposite of the teacher that successful people so often cite as the inspiration that got them to make something of their life. What a miserable experience in every single way this strip is.

Les’ senior students did poorly on their quiz last Monday and now his freshman students have done poorly on theirs… I see a common denominator here. I bet these students would too if Westview High had a math teacher.

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Les Quizérables

Hello SOSFers, billytheskink here to ponder the ponderous ponderings of this comic strip with you all for the next couple weeks.

Why does Garfield hate Mondays? He’s a cat, he doesn’t have a job. His owner doesn’t have a job that keeps him from making lasagna on Mondays (or a job at all, even… is Jon still supposed to be a cartoonist?). I guess Mondays are when Nermal shows up, but that happens on rare occasions and Nermal always sticks around for at least a week anyways, making whole weeks terrible.

I have just now realized that Garfield hates Mondays because he read today’s strip, and it is hard to blame him. I think I hate Mondays now too.

We have seen Les berate his students before (including just under a month ago, in fact), but this time he has decided to leave the classroom door wide open so passers by can hear him humiliate every single student he has been charged with teaching. You know, maybe this is TB’s attempt to bring a balanced perspective to this strip. He’s done an anti-bullying story arc, why not a pro-bullying one?

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Not Your Stepping Stone

It looks like we get one of this strip’s patented jogging gags in today’s strip. Looks, however, can be decieving.

No, I would not classify today’s gag as a jogging gag. It is haplessness gag, a staple of Act I reconfigured to fit the age of the strip’s main characters. Back in Act I it was Les and Dinkle’s pupils who were most often the butt of such jokes. Now in Act III, Funky has assumed Les’ former role, his pitiful sole can’t keep from stumbling over the same little rock over-and-over as he tries and fails to get some much-needed exercise. Les has kind of assumed Dinkle’s role, lording his perfection over the morons surrounding him. Act I, however, was sometimes self-aware about how irritating Dinkle’s behavior was. Can we say the same about Act III?

It also looks like Les, who gave Durwood “the bum’s rush” yesterday so he could get to work on his new/old Lisa project, is procrastinating again. This look is not deceiving.

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Sleepless in SEATtle

SosfdavidO here, marveling at Tombat’s continued use of telling when he should show and showing when he should tell, like in today’s strip.

Here’s how this would have went down in the real world:

Crazy Harry: “I’m here two hours early for the movie!”
Employee: “Why?”
Crazy Harry: “To get the perfect seat.”
Employee: “Which one is that?”
Crazy Harry: “Well, um.. the one in the middle…”

But in the interest of *comedy* we have to go through a whole week of the employee actually leaving his ticket booth to see what the hell Harry is talking about. Who sold the newcomers tickets? Who knows!

How this should have went down:

(Harry and Holly are seated at the theater)
Harry: “Can you see the screen?”
Holly: Yes.”
Harry: “Is your seat comfortable?”
Holly: “Yes.”
Harry: “Are you in a draft?”
Holly: “No…”
Harry: “Would you switch me seats!?”

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Luckily, The Other 1% Are Already Dead!

Link To Today’s Thing.

No one can go from maudlin to goofy quite like the BatTom can. In this week’s installment of “The Most Annoying Man In The World”, it seems that Les (who up to this point has done nothing but mope and complain) has forgotten to book a venue for the thirty-seventh-and-a-half (or whatever) class reunion, which means the entire class will despise him EVEN MORE, as unlikely as that seems. Nice work there, dingus. What a dick.

Now longtime FW readers already know what this means. When there’s an event in need of a venue, it usually means it’s Montoni’s to the rescue. After all, what other local venue even exists? So let’s take a look at the tote board and examine the “where will the WHS reunion be held?” odds, shall we?

Montoni’s – even. By far the most likely outcome, plus Funky and Holly won’t have to walk too far. And pizza!

WHS – 5-1. Les (Cayla too) does, after all, work there. He could probably finagle some sort of deal with Principal Nate and hold the reunion at WHS itself, which would be pretty weird, but definitely plausible. And sepia-toned gym rope flashbacks!

Les’ house – 10-1. Seems sort of implausible, but not totally out of the question. And it could rain!

Gazebo Park – 50-1. I suppose it’s possible and there’s the possibility of rain and maybe even lightning (aka “hilarity”), but still. I just don’t see it.

Komix Korner – 200-1. Lord knows there’s enough room, as all John would have to do is kick Owen and Alex out for a few hours. But it’s pretty unlikely, unless they go for some sort of comic book-themed reunion. Which is never totally out of the question. But I just can’t see that thundering herd making it up that staircase, not even single-file.

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