Today’s strip is both stupid and gross. I have nothing else to say about it.
Here are some better comic strips, read them instead…
Tag Archives: old crap
by billytheskink | May 20, 2022 · 10:30 pm
Off The Depend
Filed under Son of Stuck Funky
Tagged as awful wordplay, bad wordplay, complete lack of humor, Complete Worthless Ass, crappy ploddinng stories that never get anywhere, Crazy, Crazy Harry, curmudgeonly oldsters, disembodied hand, Funky, Funky Winkerbean, Funkys, hip, Holly, I used to be cool, idiocy, isn't it ironic?, lame wordplay, misappropriated wordplay, Montoni's, Montoni's apron, moronic grins, Now Crazy Harry, Now Funky, old crap, Old dying people, pizza, really dumb questions, sad-sackery, sheer idiocy, Squick, stupid, sub-moronic wordplay, terrible wordplay, the inevitable ravages of age, the raptor claw in Holly's hair, the ravages of age, tiny hands, toilet humor, unnatural hand gestures, wordplay
by billytheskink | December 25, 2021 · 10:30 pm
Il Dunce
Finally having a clear schedule after directing both the choir and the band at St. Spires’ Christmas Eve service, Dinkle has no time to rest as he prepares in today’s strip to march in the Tournament of Roses Parade with his fellow fans of fascist regalia band directors. Seems like this thing was announced years ago (about 6 months, actually), but I guess The World’s Greatest Band DirectorTM doesn’t need more than a week to prepare. He does, however, need a little help from the tailor… something Harriet realized 11 years ago (a time so long ago that Dinkle was watching recordings of his concerts on his flip phone).
What assuredly entertaining and engrossing things will Dinkle get up to in Pasadena? I don’t know, but it will be Spaceman Spiff who will guide us through them. Good luck and happy holidays!
Filed under Son of Stuck Funky
Tagged as ancient Dinkle gags, band, band directing, curmudgeonly oldsters, Dinkle, Dinkle's house, dumb clothing jokes, exposition, giant mouths, Harriet, Harry Dinkle, hatchet face, insufferability, old crap, Old Dinkle, Old dying people, old Harry Dinkle, old useless junk, the inevitable ravages of age, the ravages of age, Tournament of Roses Parade, very old gags
by billytheskink | September 26, 2021 · 10:30 pm
Thoughts and Ayers
Hope you all enjoyed yesterday’s respite from the boringly toxic (or rather, toxically boring) Melinda-Holly relationship, because we’re back for (checks calendar) WEEK 3?! of it in today’s strip. Things between these two are so bad that Holly will ignore good advice that is widely known by nearly every adult who has ever engaged in athletic behavior just to spite her nagging mother.
This strip has everything! Needless exposition! Falling leaves! Absolutely nothing likable! References that would have been topical 3 decades ago! References to death! And more word and thought bubbles than you can shake a baton at!
Filed under Son of Stuck Funky
Tagged as alumni band, anger, band, band practice, batons, death, enraging hair strands, exposition, Falling leaves, fury, Holly, Holly's mom, Holly's mother whose name escapes me at the moment, Jane Fonda, leaves, Melinda, misplaced nostalgia for things that weren't all that great to begin with, nostalgia, old crap, Old dying people, pissiness, references that were real topical a year ago, tags you never thought you'd use, terrible overacting, the raptor claw in Holly's hair, thought provocation, Westview HS Band, WHS band
by billytheskink | September 25, 2021 · 10:30 pm
Boredstrom
The department store nostalgia in today’s strip is pretty innocuous as Funky Winkerbean goes. I am enough of a retail enthusiast to know that department store nostalgia is totally a thing, by the way… but I’m not sure it manifests itself in wistful disappointment when receiving an Amazon package.
But since Amazon’s logo is clearly visible on present day Holly’s package, let’s talk about THIS:
There are several, actual historic and defunct department stores in the greater Cleveland-Akron area that TB could have pulled up: O’Neil’s, Polskys, May Co., the one that Dinkle named his daughter after, the particularly famous one that had the previously-referenced-in-this-very-comic-strip Silver Grill [sic] in it.
Nope, we get Holly’s memory of shopping at DS, which by all indications stands for… Department Store. DS. Department. Store. This is Herb & Jamaal-level non-specificity. Look TB, if you can reference Amazon specifically, you can reference an actual department store specifically. The strip loses nothing if you get Ayers to write “Higbee’s” on a couple of shopping bags instead of DS.
Filed under Son of Stuck Funky
Tagged as Amazon smirk, anon-o-customer, crappy ploddinng stories that never get anywhere, Falling leaves, flashback, Holly, Holly's mom, Holly's mother whose name escapes me at the moment, leaves, Melinda, misplaced nostalgia for things that weren't all that great to begin with, nostalgia, old crap, old useless junk, substitute names for popular retail chains, the raptor claw in Holly's hair, useless old junk
by billytheskink | September 24, 2021 · 10:30 pm
Flaming Batom Schtick
Apologies for today’s short post, but this story arc has gone about as well as my week at work has… And today’s strip doesn’t do much to improve matters. It doesn’t do much period.
The insurance companies Dinkle may have put a stop to the flaming baton trick, but don’t you dare think he is losing his touch. He has happily proposed maiming senior citizens with fire in recent years.
Filed under Son of Stuck Funky
Tagged as alumni band, band, band directing, curmudgeonly oldsters, Flaming batons, Harry, Harry Dinkle, hatchet face, Holly, Holly's mother whose name escapes me at the moment, marching band, marching bands, Melinda, misplaced nostalgia for things that weren't all that great to begin with, nostalgia, old crap, Old Dinkle, Old dying people, old gags from the 1970's, old Harry Dinkle, old useless junk, running ideas into the ground, shadow Hollys, silhouette, silhouettes, the raptor claw in Holly's hair, towel curtains, very old gags, Westview HS Band, WHS band
by billytheskink | September 22, 2021 · 10:30 pm
Alumnaiku
Look, the man himself Deigns to appear on panel Here in today's strip Why is he worried No one is coming to see Him in uniform No one is coming To see Holly twirl either But whatever y'all This Harry Dinkle, He sounds like a real jerk This guy here, real jerk With his history Of abusing band members Why would alums play But of course these two Still have their band uniforms No one leaves high school
Filed under Son of Stuck Funky
Tagged as alumni band, band, band directing, cell phones, cellphone, curmudgeonly oldsters, Dinkle, Dinkle's house, dumb clothing jokes, giant mouths, Harry, Harry Dinkle, Holly, huge hands, idiocy, knowing smirks, marching bands, old crap, Old Dinkle, Old dying people, old Harry Dinkle, sheer idiocy, smirk, smirks, smirks exchanged, telephone transactions, The Golden Dinkles, the inevitable ravages of age, the raptor claw in Holly's hair, the ravages of age, towel curtains, very old gags, Westview HS Band, WHS band
by billytheskink | September 20, 2021 · 10:30 pm
By Invitation Lonely
Oh, so Melinda wasn’t thinking of entering Holly in a pageant! No, as we learn in today’s strip, she was thinking about hijacking Westview High School’s homecoming and subjecting the crowd to Holly’s flaming baton trick and its subsequent collateral damage. Duh. I don’t know where Holly got the idea that her mother was trying to get her to enter a pageant, it’s not like Melinda led into this homecoming performance idea by talking about pageants or anything…
It was smart of Holly to suggest inviting a bunch of band alumni into this scheme. Not because making this an actual alumni event rather than a single woman’s vainglorious showcase means the school would likely be more accommodating. Not because it will place anyone not related to her who might be interested in seeing her performance out on the field instead of up in the grandstands. Not because it will give Wally a chance to break out his trombone again. Not even because it seems to deflate her conniving mother.
No, it was smart because Holly knows as well as anyone that misery loves company.
Filed under Son of Stuck Funky
Tagged as band, curmudgeonly oldsters, enraging facial expressions, enraging hair strands, Holly, Holly's mom, Holly's mother whose name escapes me at the moment, marching band, Melinda, misplaced nostalgia for things that weren't all that great to begin with, nostalgia, old crap, Old dying people, old gags from the 1970's, old useless junk, Remembrence of Strips Past, the raptor claw in Holly's hair, useless old junk, very old gags, Westview HS Band, woman with receding hairline
by billytheskink | July 10, 2021 · 10:30 pm
Landing at Bore-mandy
Blah blah blah today’s strip… blah blah blah Phil Holt… blah blah blah comic books… blah blah blah The Subterranean… blah blah blah yackity smackity…
Meanwhile… *stupid cloud bubble panel border that TB inexplicably thinks should indicate an in-strip shift from one place to another*
Everyone’s 5th favorite Stooge, “Curly-Joe” DeRita, and Darth Vader himself are hanging out at Ye Olde Comic Shoppe. What’s that all about? Spacemanspiff85 is going to be our guide as we find out (provided we do in the next two weeks). Thoughts and prayers, man, thoughts and prayers.
Filed under Son of Stuck Funky
Tagged as air travel, airplanes, airports, Atomik Komix, Batom Comics, Batom's bizarre comic book fantasy world, boredom personified, bubble transition from one place to another, Chester, Chester the Chiseler, Chester's intrigued face, comic books, Comic-Con, comics, contempt for comic book nerds, Darin, embarrassing errors a comics fan shouldn't make, endless tedium, Flash Freeman, impending doom, knowing smirks, masks, Mindy, Minty Pete, Mopey Pete, old crap, Old dying people, one of those arcs that just never seems to end, Pete, Pete's Plaid Shirt, Phil Holt, Ruby, Ruby Lith, San Diego, smirk, smirks, Star Wars, stupid cloud bubble panel border, sunglasses, the comic book industry, the untimely death of Phil Holt, things that never end, Ye Olde Comics Shoppe
by billytheskink | July 7, 2021 · 10:30 pm
Haikranky
Obligatory Haiku post for today's strip Where nothing happens "Who spent most of his Time at war with the world and Ev'rything in it"? We talking about Phil Holt or that Ed Crankshaft? Both? Makes me shudder C'mon now, Durwood Phil did not know a dang thing About your mother C'mon too, Mindy Who here cares one iota About your granddad? Pete here wins the strip Only offense is a smirk Default win's a win
Filed under Son of Stuck Funky
Tagged as air travel, airplanes, anger, Batom Comics, Batom's bizarre comic book fantasy world, character death, comic books, Comic-Con, comics, Crankshaft, curmudgeonly oldsters, Darin, death, Flash Freeman, melting faces, Mindy, Minty Pete, Mopey Pete, mouths way too low on the face, old crap, Old dying people, Pete, Pete's Plaid Shirt, Phil Holt, smirk, that unnamed cranky guy, the untimely death of Phil Holt, weird noses
by billytheskink | July 6, 2021 · 10:30 pm
Something’s got a Holt on me
If there was a contest to use the most words possible to say “Flash and Phil didn’t like each other”, today’s strip would definitely be a contender. Same for a most exposition crammed into a single panel contest, with panel 1 making a game effort. The only place such contests could possibly exist is, of course, the Batiukverse… so please forgive me if similar contests appear in this strip a year from now.
All that exposition in the first panel and Flash doesn’t realize the hall of fame awards given out at Comic-Con honor the deceased on the regular? Seems like having Comic-Con remotely would work well in Flash’s hypothetical honoring a live Phil Holt scenario, but since Flash doesn’t even know that dead people regularly get honored at this and other hall of fame ceremonies then it stands to reason that he wouldn’t know that Comic-Con and other events are held remotely. And by “Flash” in the previous sentence, I mean TB.
Filed under Son of Stuck Funky
Tagged as air travel, airplanes, awards, Batom Comics, Batom's bizarre comic book fantasy world, character death, Chester, Chester the Chiseler, comic books, Comic-Con, comics, Darin, death, Eisner Awards, embarrassing errors a comics fan shouldn't make, Flash Freeman, flight risks, not how the world works, old crap, Old dying people, Phil Holt, Ruby, Ruby Lith, silly awards, the comic book industry, the untimely death of Phil Holt, unearned awards, uninteresting stupid anecdotes, weird noses, word zeppelins
Son of Stuck Funky 
