Tag Archives: hoodie

A View with A Room

Link to today’s strip.

As Old Dexter once said, “Ah, thank you Billy!” and I thank BillyTheSkink for as always leaving the chair of Funky Winkerbean snark…just a little bit out of my reach!  Yes, it’s BChasm, your least favorite uncle, back in the chair of the unhallowed study group!

Like pretty much all of Funky Winkerbean, I don’t get this one.  The Doublemint Twins are looking for a particular room.  Given that numbered rooms follow a pattern in every universe, it would seem as if Room 107 would be somewhere in the 100’s, and thus, not that difficult to find.  Westview High can’t be that massive, can it?  It’s not a colony ship destined for Alpha Centauri, is it?  Is Cordwainer Bird around?

I should think that it’s odd, too, that the Twins just spent a week with Principal Nate, and he apparently told them nothing of value, such as where their classrooms would be located.  “Here’s Becky, and here’s Les.  Good luck!”

Knowing this (–one supposes), Redshirt McMeltface decided he’d have a spot of fun with the Twins, and thus directed them to a featureless door which he assured them used to be yclept “107.”  Why?  I can see no reason for McMeltface to be this mean, except…well, it’s an excuse to detail some kind of maintenance room.

And to be fair, the detail in this room is really impressive.  And I mean that sincerely; one can almost identify the make and model of the equipment presented herein.  Kudos to Mr. Batiuk for some nice artwork here.  This is the sort of stuff that makes me pause my snark, in that it shows Tom Batiuk can really draw when he wants to.  Really, I’m not hot-dogging you, this is good artwork–it’s nicely detailed and has all the bits and touches that make the scene work.  I’ve always wanted to praise this strip when the opportunity arose, and here’s an opportunity.

Tom Batiuk’s obsession over certain details–the lovingly rendered bricks, for example–have long a source of amusement, but to me, it does show a certain dedication to craft.  The details have to be there.

I just wish his craft had been put to better purpose.  Does “Room 107” have any kind of significance?  Because I can think of better numbers just off the top of my head–

Room 100, Hotel Chelsea.  Nancy’s dead, Sid’s out of his head.  Punk rock fell over dead.  Now it’s Miley Cyrus instead!  Wake me–going back to bed.

Room 101, from George Orwell’s 1984.  The room of the ultimate fear, where Winston Smith is forced to read The Complete Funky Winkerbean.

Room 217, from Stephen King’s The Shining.  Danny knew he shouldn’t go into this room, but he did anyway.  And there, standing in the middle of the room, was Les Moore.

Room 237, from Stanley Kubrick’s film of Stephen King’s book.  As Jack Torrance embraced the beautiful woman, he glanced in the mirror and saw that, instead, he was holding a naked Les Moore.  (This scene was changed by studio executives to allow an R rating.  In the film as released, Jack was holding a withered old hag.)

Speaking of changed by studio executives, Doublemint Naughty certainly has…developed…in that last panel.  In fact you might say, “Oh, she’s got a balcony you could do Shakespeare from!”



Filed under Son of Stuck Funky

Pizza My Mind

Wow, greasy, fattening pizza (which Funky undoubtedly donated) and flat Montoni’s root beer for all! Thanks Jessica! You really know how to show gratitude in today’s strip! You’d think from the look on Jessica’s face she’d just gotten them all tickets to Disneyland. The look on Cayla and Keisha’s faces say it all; please God, not another slice of Westview’s worst and only pizza.


Filed under Son of Stuck Funky

What Baby

SoSfDavidO here! Ya know, we’ve all heard Hollywood makes you self-centered but today’s strip pushes that a bit far, considering Jessica isn’t even out there yet.

Let’s do a quick tally, shall we? So far, Evil Hollywood has sucked away Mopey Pete, Jessica, Darin and Cindy Summers. At this rate there won’t be a Westview left after Les and Co. moves out so he can work on his screenplay. And hey, sure there’s plenty of need in California for greasy, Ohio-style pizza so why not move Montoni’s out there, too? Oscars for everyone!



Filed under Son of Stuck Funky

Now the First of December Was Covered with Snow

Many, many thanks to David O for handling author duties over the last fortnight!

Epicus Doomus
November 28, 2013 at 11:11 pm
…I like how Summer just decided to keep wearing the hoodie straight through the year until it was weather-appropriate again. I assume she has an entire closet full of them and not just one…at least I hope she does.

Reckon she’s not only got a closet full of KSU hoodies, but she’s got ’em in blue and gold! Weather-appropriate? Guess so, since it’s all Summer needs to protect her against snowflakes the size of Montoni’s meatballs.

You’d think, though, that a young woman who could shell out $54 for a sweatshirt would spend a little more on a baby gift for her nephew. Instead, Auntie Summer comes bearing “Small Bear”, a cherished toy from her own kid-hood. “Here, “bro”: give this moldy, raggedy old thing to your newborn to play with!”

And Mr. Batiuk, please do a little research into what an infant carrier looks like: that little cameo in panel one looks like nothing so much as a baby reposing in a propped-up coffin!


Filed under Son of Stuck Funky


There’s a scene in the holiday classic movie “Gremlins” where the Gremlins all break into a bar and start smoking, drinking, cussing, gambling and swinging on ceiling fans. It’s great fun for the first minute but the bit goes on for about three minutes longer than it should and you’re left thinking: “Can we get back to the plot now?”

Today’s strip is a lot like that. Okay, you had a baby. It’s cute, apparently, we’ll just have to take your word for it, Westviewites, because it looks like a Mr. Potato Head toy from here. But can we get on with the strip!?


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Summer Blue Times

Today’s strip

Les: Was [Lisa’s journal] hard to read?

Summer: No… It’s funny, insightful…

This strip… It’s sad, pathetic…

I’m puzzled, snarky…

That is I’m skeptical, confused…

Summer: The only sad part was getting to the end and realizing that Mom wasn’t going to be writing in it anymore.

Really‽ That was the only sad part‽

Snarkers! Let’s help Summer remember the other sad parts!


Filed under Son of Stuck Funky

Lisa’s Legacy ’Lash

Today’s strip

Ouch! I just got narrative whiplash! For a strip that usually proceeds with the pace of a slow IV drip, it’s really unexpected to go from zombie prom, back to football for a day, and the very next day to Lisa’s Legacy Run. Has our favorite auteur suddenly decided to add cinematic flash cuts and literary techniques like simultaneous parallel subplots? Or is he just doing something incomprehensible like the time he teleported Les off of Kilimanjaro for a day to name Funky’s car?

Ah, Westview! Think of the tropes we’ll see today!

  • ¼-inch from reality.

    Check! Lisa’s Legacy Run, an event that briefly leaked out into reality, exists no more in Real Ohio, but persists like sciatica in Funky Ohio.

  • Being a “reality-based comic strip that depicts contemporary issues affecting young adults in a thought-provoking and sensitive manner.”

    Check! Cayla’s daughter and Lisa’s daughter are back from college, to help organize the race. In October. During midterms, I’d guess. Of course, we don’t know what’s been going on in these young women’s college lives, because all we’ve seen of that is them moving into a dorm room. You know: the most interesting, most sensitive thing young people do in college—move their stuff into a small room.

  • Cayla’s existence subordinated to Lisa.

    Check! She’s literally holding Lisa’s name before her.

  • A falling leaf.

    Check! Can you find it? Panel 2, center of window pane. It’s tricky, because the auteur and the colorist couldn’t be bothered to discuss how the falling leaf should be red or yellow, not green.

Hi! As the great Steve Martin once said (approximately): “I know it sounds insincere to say, ‘Hey! It’s really great to be here!’ But hey! It’s really great to be here.” I hope I shall snark entertainingly during my guest stint!


Filed under Son of Stuck Funky