Tag Archives: squiggly lines

Snow Daze

Linda continues to kvetch about the negative impact that Bull’s condition will have on her retirement plans. I guess it’s a quarter inch from reality that someone faced with having to care for a partner in declining health is entitled to feel bad and complain. It sure makes for a depressing “comic” strip though. Does Linda have any other friends in whom she can confide, aside from Les, who until this week has demonstrated zero concern for the well being of his old tormentor and tennis partner?

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Beep Beep! Beep Beep NO!

Welcome, snarkers. Apologies to anyone who encountered a “Password required” prompt when checking out the site Sunday night.

Epicus Doomus
February 17, 2019 at 11:57 pm
There are sadder-sacks in Westview for sure, but no character embodies sheer exhausted defeat quite like Linda does. Wry in a weary sort of way, sardonic, skeptical, beaten, demoralized, miserable and OK with that…that’s Linda’s whole character.


Sooo Bull’s become more unstable, though he seemed pretty fine at the Hall of Fame indictment, uh, induction. Maybe the “minor car accident” occured on the way home from the ceremony? No doubt there are some among our readership who’ve had to deal with a loved one whom, due to age or infirmity, must be persuaded to give up driving. It’s a delicate discussion, to be sure. Much easier to take advantage of the loved one’s enfeeblement, and simply hide the keys in the drawer with the good scissors, and allow him to search for them in vain until finally, it no longer matters.

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Really, Linda

In the glacially paced Funkiverse, we’ve learned to appreciate anything that passes for actual plot advancement. Linda has decided to retire, and the first one with whom she shares this important news is, naturally, her work husband Les. I’m wondering what Bull’s “maxed out” CTE is going to look like. So far, it’s merely turned him into a passive, mildly dumber version of his already dumb self. He definitely has depression, and his grasp on reality isn’t helped by well-meaning friends who retcon his past failings into Hall of Fame accomplishments.

I just had to share a remixed FW strip that appeared a few years ago at the comics blog Snark It Up, Fuzzball, which depicts a much happier outcome for Bushka Family.

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I Wish This Strip Was OK

I don’t think I’ve seen too many more blatant examples of “sporto talk” as written by someone who never played sports and isn’t that familiar with them. “Shared our competition”? It really seems like he’s leading into “. . . but we also shared a forbidden love that we had to hide, from both the world, and ourselves. What’s that, Bull? You don’t remember that? Oh, that’s probably because of the CTE, right, pal?”.
And of course the only worthwhile thing about Bull is his Very Serious Condition. I’ve got to assume his induction has nothing do with his athletic accomplishments, but rather the terrible thing that happened to him. Because that’s the only reason Batiuk cares about him.

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There’s Always Someone Around You

Link to today’s strip.

And another strip unavailable for preview.  Of course, that’s typical for Sundays so no surprises there.  I dare say, if I may be so bold, that it has been quite some time since we last saw Funky and Les running.  Or we might just get more Dinkle.

Anyway, for my first time back in the chair in a while, let’s recall the wonders we witnessed recently during my stint:  Wally got a pizza party and Dinkle looked for food.  When your strip is just jammed full of action and adventure like that, you should certainly expect the awards to roll on in!   You’d also expect people to buy your books, not only for themselves but as gifts for others!  I mean, who wouldn’t want a boxed set of Dinkle’s entire Claude Barlow witlessisms?  Sure, maybe the Norms would balk, but they’re not on award committees so they can be ignored.  And ignored with gusto!

Well!  That’s it for me, at least for the present.  It’s time to hand off this cold, damp slice of pizza off to the Stunningly Suave SpacemanSpiff85!    He’ll focus his fearsome frap-ray blaster on the festering fools who fill Funky‘s foul fiefdom–for a fortnight!

Thank you all for your indulgence!  And now, exit–stage right!

 

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Auld Lang Wry

Link To Today’s Strip

Mother-in-laws….amirite? I mean come on. What’s a fella to do? One dame at home is plenty and I already have a dog to fetch my pipe, slippers and tumbler of scotch, thank you very much. What an old bag and so forth. And now the Copa is proud to introduce…Mr. Henny Youngman!

So another three hundred and sixty-five FW strips are in the bag. It sure looks like a lot when you spell it out like that. I mean you can say the same thing about any Act III year but man, 2018 was a real shit pile, even by FW standards. Exactly four things happened in FW in 2018.

Pete and Boy Lisa left Hollywood and began working for a whimsical Ohio-based komix book company. Mindy later joined them. They presumably still work there.

Wally, who may or may not be over the worst of his PTSD, invited his apparently estranged daughter Rana to Thanksgiving dinner. She accepted.

Bull’s rushing record was broken.

Funky’s mother-in-law visited Westview for a band competition and may remain there until she dies.

Pete and Boy Lisa’s unholy alliance with Chester was by far the dominant story arc of 2018 but even so, after all that time and all that toil he’s still only at the “they work there now” part of the story, which is exactly where it’ll resume and exactly where it’ll end next time as well. And what did we learn about our old pal Wally during his nearly two month long forced march of an arc? Well, apparently he’s “almost” about to graduate and he “seems” to be “doing better”, which is hardly news. He did invite his apparently estranged and seldom-seen daughter to dinner, though, which is where the story left off. Yup, that’s some real compelling character development right there.

Pervert Mort made a late run there at the end but the RRRRRRRR thing in the Wally arc was probably the single dumbest FW moment of the year in my opinion. 2018’s SoSF Most Reviled Player award (the “Les Moore Award”) goes to Les Moore, obviously, although the overall lack of Les was 2018’s sole bright spot. Pete and Boy Lisa are co-runners-up, though. It’s easy to forget now but that AK idiocy went on for freaking months.

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Extinction Tourism

PharmDawg
January 3, 2018 at 11:22 pm
If this was an AA meeting, somebody would have stopped Funky mid-sentence by saying, “In keeping with our singleness of purpose and our Third Tradition which states that ‘The only requirement for A.A. membership
is a desire to stop drinking,’ we ask that all who participate confine their discussion to their problems with
alcohol.”

Comment of the week right there, folks. Of course, what we’re seeing is not an AA meeting, but what Batiuk thinks an AA meeting is like. Hence, we see people drinking coffee (which does happen) and smoking cigarettes (which is not allowed indoors in most places, including Ohio).

Of course, no list by Batiuk of What Ails the World would be complete without a mention of climate change, and everyone’s complicity in same: “We’re sending cruise ships…” Watching glaciers melt, or grass grow, or paint dry would be far more interesting than wading through a week of this dreck.

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