Tag Archives: Flash treadmill

Haik-ewwwwwwww

Today’s strip is squick
Squick of the highest order
Gross in every way

“The Cosmic Treadmill”
“Yeah… that and in the shower”
These are words to fear

Why is Mindy here?
Is she unemployed or what?
A real catch there, Pete

Not that Pete is much
To write home about, Mindy
Well… he is a creep

Is Mindy working?
Why did I even ask this?
Just Funky works, duh

This strip makes me both
Want to take a shower and
Not, at the same time

Advertisements

15 Comments

Filed under Son of Stuck Funky

Dork(s) And Mindy

Today’s strip is finally up, and it looks like we’re in for another week of the Ratty Atom Bullpen… or maybe it’s a Pete and Mindy week… or maybe it’s a descent to the Nth circle of hell (one can only hope).

So Mindy has just seen Pete strolling on the Flash treadmill for the first time. If she’s still dating him in tomorrow’s strip, we can confirm her standards are even more depressingly low than once though. Could have had Mooch Myers… Could have. *sigh*

22 Comments

Filed under Son of Stuck Funky

Dry Drowning

Today’s strip is finally up.

I was desperately hoping that my return to the writer’s helm after months of this meandering nonsense would be the magical talisman to break this unending inanity. I was there when this plot started in February, and maybe now it could end.

No such luck. Pete is plodding along on his Cosmic Treadmill…using awful word association to come up with cut-rate characters. I’m sure that the Floodlight, or the Floodmaster, or Floody McFlooderson the World’s Wettest Woman, will be nothing more than a name, a costume, a gimmick, and an even worse arch nemesis with drought powers. No Batman or Captain America levels of backstory, built in angst, creeds, and psychological insight. Just a stupid idea, personified.

Floods of biblical proportions can’t drown shallow characters. They’re hollow and insubstantial rising to the top and clinging together in a choking mat of garbage.

Yes I am comparing TomBat’s idea of ‘comicbook characters’ with the Great Pacific Garbage Patch.

26 Comments

Filed under Son of Stuck Funky

Working For The Weak End

Link To The Thing We All Hate

I’d like to take a moment to thank TFH, our contributors and our loyal readers for standing tall during this ponderous and plodding time. He’s obviously trying to break our collective will here and the stand you’ve all taken during this extremely tedious time will never be forgotten. If Monday rolls around and Funky is jogging or something it’ll be like emerging into daylight after some sort of long protracted siege of dullness or a really boring natural disaster of some kind.

And speaking of time that’ll never be forgotten, I must have fallen into a lengthy coma and missed several months of strips, as AK is apparently already up and running and brimming with treadmill inspired brilliance. He crammed several seconds of story into the first eleven and a half weeks of this thing and now suddenly, completely out of nowhere, everything has abruptly lurched forward in the most boring way possible. I mean maybe I’m wrong and this was just the most productive day in the history of new comic book companies but given the characters we’re talking about here that seems very unlikely.

I just really want Pete, Boy Lisa, Chester and AK to go away for a while…a long while. I usually complain when he just abandons story threads and never resolves them but in this case I’m genuinely rooting for it to happen.

 

12 Comments

Filed under Son of Stuck Funky

Don’t Treadmill On Me

Link To Today’s Plodding Installment

As BatLoad’s interest in his latest “offbeat” comic book fantasy begins to wane, he’s resorting to old comic book fantasy gags to grudgingly haul another pointless week to the Saturday finish line. This arc is the comic strip equivalent of dragging a soggy ruined carpet out of the basement. In today’s time-bending installment the ol’ Eaton building is a dynamic hub of activity with all sorts of whimsical subcontractors and comic book memorabilia delivery people buzzing around like worker bees. Things sure do move fast once every eleven weeks in the Funkyverse.

“Hello, Pete Reynolds? This is Bob over at Pre-Cog Shipping and Delivery…anticipating and meeting your shipping and delivery needs before you knew you had any since 1979. Just wanted to let you know your movie prop and treadmill are on their way to the location you’ll be working at and we’ll be billing you with your Visa card, the number, expiration date and three-digit security code of which we already know. It doesn’t appear that you’ll have any imminent issues or concerns, so have a great day!”

Anyway, it’s Boy Lisa’s stupid treadmill, not Pete’s, so when and where he used it to “think” is (sigh) yet another never-to-be-solved Batom anomaly, like Becky’s mom or the Food Film truck scam or what year it’s supposed to be. It’s best not to think about it too much, but it’s tough when he gives you so precious little else to focus on.

 

 

16 Comments

Filed under Son of Stuck Funky

Oh No…It IS Mail

Link To Today’s Strip

Oh no…it’s mail…and it’s an entire package too. Sigh, this could take a while, given how Boy Lisa once needed six months to open a single envelope. I really hope it’s evidence proving that Lisa wasn’t his bio-mom (as if) and the entire Funkyverse implodes upon itself, but the likelihood of that happening seems, uh, slim. It’s a Boy Lisa arc, therefore whatever it is it’ll be dumb beyond belief, that much is guaranteed.

And get a load of Pete/Tom’s little “dig” at lawyers. I guess they’re the scum of the earth…unless some humble little blog makes fun of your silly little comic strip, in which case they’re your pals…ain’t that right, Tom? Pete’s whole world-weary act really gets my goat, I mean the guy lives a fantasy comic book lifestyle most overgrown nerds would kill for yet all he does is gripe, bitch and complain about it. Just shut up and write your little Xaxian stories, you mopey nitwit.

27 Comments

Filed under Son of Stuck Funky