Tag Archives: Old dying people

In-No-Sense

< sarcasm >
Today’s strip clears up so much!
< /sarcasm >

Dashiell Hammett “felt” Brinkel was innocent of Valerie Pond’s murder? Well… how can you argue with that? Especially when Hammett himself believed that Brinkel was covering up for the REAL murderer, which is… not a crime? Is that right?

Interesting that Cliff is essentially hatching a conspiracy theory about Brinkel, given how he didn’t seem to care for Senator McCarthy’s conspiracy theories about his own actions.

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Haiku-mmett

Batiukverse space time
Still warping in today’s strip
A 40s newsboy?

Street-hawking newsboys
Were in decline in the 10s
And gone by 40s

Hammett’s Pinkertons
Found nothing on Brinkel’s case
They were years early

Or have we gone back?
Brinkel’s a silent star?
40s a typo?

Who knows? I sure don’t
Author sure doesn’t either
Just end this thing, please

Bad newspapermen
Are ones who print comics like
Funky Winkerbean

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When’s This Story Gonna Endsday, July 10

Today’s strip was not available for preview, so we’ll all just have to wait for midnight Eastern time to see how Cliff’s hallucinations of Sam Spade prove Brinkel’s innocence or something.

In lieu of this Brinkel nonsense, let’s hop back 23 years to this very day, the last time a Funky Winkerbean character attempted to solve a celebrity murder.

The summer of 1996 was a busy one in the Batiukverse. Lisa was badly injured when talk radio caused the Westview Post Office bombing and Les was busy working on his first book, the eventual Fallen Star, where a fictional detective (surely not Sam Spade?) solved John Darling’s murder.

FW7-10-96

The interviewee here is Wade Wallace (he eventually became Funky’s AA sponsor) and Les didn’t even seek him out for this interview. Nope, this exchange happened because Funky, Les, and Lisa caught him running an ongoing scam where he would call and order a pizza, not pick it up, and then fish it out of the Montoni’s dumpster when Funky threw it out… y’know, because he was homeless. In fact, he likely had been homeless for a nearly 2 decades at this point, as his homelessness was used to set up a vanity gag in a December 1979 John Darling strip. Act II was a maudlin mess.

Wallace returned later in the summer to return a publisher’s check to Les, which he found because Les accidentally threw it out like an idiot. Les spends three strips in a dumpster looking for the check, which is a real highlight in Batiukverse history.

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What the Starbuck?!

If today’s strip is any indication, comic books make your nose grow.

Also, this angry fellow who may be Stinky Peterson or perhaps Flash’s long-lost grandson apparently hasn’t read TB’s blog series Batom Comics – The Untold History, which affirms Flash Freeman as the creator of Starbuck Jones in name and concept. Not that I blame him, of course, I didn’t even read it…

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A Silver-Age Comic

“I thought you were dead.”
Says Bernie in today’s strip
“Nice to meet you too.”

Bernie, Bernie *sigh*
It’s Phil Holt that’s the dead guy
Turn in your nerd card

It’s a fair guess, though
Batom Comics was founded
65 years back

That’s without time jumps
So Flash must be 90 plus
Did time stretch his face?

Thatsnought’s creepy smile
Over Durwood’s chicken scratch?
It’s a rictus grin

Pete, what’s with that face?
Keep your hands where we can see
Please please please please please

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Out of Commission

The overestimation of Pete and Durwood’s market value we saw yesterday continues in today’s strip, though now it is Durwood and Pete who are doing the overestimating.

$10 to draw Thatsnought Hewmore into a Sophomoric Sightings panel?! That’s piracy! Durwood draws a couple of unknown titles for a startup comics publisher and is exhibiting at a Free Comic Book Day event, nobody is there to spend money at all, much less on his limited artistic skills. Durwood should be glad-handing customers as much as possible in hopes that they’ll even consider thumbing through next month’s issue of The Inedible Pulp.

Pete’s offer is a bit better, partially because he’s charging less but mostly because he’s sitting next to Les. In contrast to Pete’s attempted $5 grift, Les is trying to unload copies of Lisa’s Story at (presumably) the suggested retail price of: HA! No.

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Diplame-a

Well, with today’s strip, Wally has officially beaten Summer across the Kent State graduation stage. And so has Buddy. And Kay Kyser too. Sheesh…

Wait, Kent State? I thought Wally was taking classes at a community college. Granted, I have an uncle who calls Kent a community college. He went to Miami (the Ohio one) though, so his opinion is a little biased.

Also, be sure to check the throw-away panels today for a rare glimpse at Becky’s left arm back when it was still attached.

Thanks for reading my two weeks covering TB’s flotsam. SOSF hall-of-famer and hall-of-namer beckoningchasm will take the helm tomorrow.

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