Tag Archives: character death

by billytheskink | November 10, 2022 · 10:30 pm

Batiuklysm

Yesterday these climage damate comics had too much testosterone… but in today’s strip Ruby is arguing that they aren’t optimistic enough. For who? For sales? For readers? For her, personally? How do you even conflate testosterone with pessimism? Is that what she’s even doing? What’s going on in her mind? What’s her motivation? Annnnnnnnnnnd, why should I care?

Flash is pretty smug about dying before the coming damate climage cataclysm occurs. I wouldn’t be if I was him. STILL drawing comic books at his age? It’s a safer bet to assume he’s immortal until proven otherwise. No one dies in the Batiukverse unless three things are satisfied:

1 – Their death is in the service of an award~~-winning~~-seeking important issue. (Okay, we can check this one, though I’m going to doubt TB has the writing chops to figure out how to kill Flash with climage damate)

2 – They are not involved in or devoted to comic books. (No check here… recall how comic book and movie serial uberschmuck Jff Murdoch survived the damate climage fire that ate Los Angeles)

3 – Their death enables Les to feel even more superior to others. (No check, again)

37 Comments

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Tagged as age discrimination, Atomik, Atomik Komix, Batton, Batton Thomas, boredom personified, character death, climate change, climate damage, comic books, comics, curmudgeonly oldsters, death, depression, Flash, Flash Fairfield, Flash Freeman, glasses, hope, insufferability, insufferable assholes, Life is a dismal horror from which you can never escape, melting faces, Old dying people, paper, Ruby, Ruby Lith, Ruby Lith's tiny neck-hand, seldom-seen characters wearing hats, smug poses, the inevitability of death, the inevitable death of the universe, the inevitable ravages of age, the ravages of age, unbearable smugness, unnatural hand gestures, welcoming death, why?

by billytheskink | August 20, 2022 · 10:30 pm

Jumping’ Jack Flashback

Today’s strip was shot in Kodachrome… despite being set even further back in time than this past week’s sepia-toned historical revision. Really sets the mood for imagined fiery death, doesn’t it?

You would (not) be surprised at how often TB goes to the well for Holly’s Act I flaming baton trick. It wouldn’t shock me if it has appeared as a gag in Act III more often than it ever actually did in Act I. But hey, after this past week, I’ll take some Sunday Funky-Holly filler, even if it involves flaming batons.

And with that, I cede the podium to Comic Book Harriet, a master of both Batiukverse history and the entertaining anecdote. I expect we will enjoy a good bit of both from her in the coming weeks.

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Tagged as abuse of WHS property, Act I, Act I call-backs, Anon-O-Character, batons, beds, character death, curmudgeonly oldsters, death, dream, dream sequence, dreams, explosions, Fire, fire hazards, Flaming batons, flashback, flashback thought bubbles, Funky, Funky Winkerbean, Funky's house, high school, Holly, Jerome T. Bushka A&L Automotive Stadium, marching band, marching bands, Now Funky, Old dying people, onomatopoeia, pencil-neck geek, pointless Sunday strips, Sunday, Westview High School, WHS, WHS band, WHS Scapegoats

by billytheskink | August 19, 2022 · 10:30 pm

Credit Fraud

Today’s strip concludes (we hope and pray and hope and wish) this latest visit from the Ghost of Distress Past. Her Royal Wryness. The VHSaint herself.

Special thanks go out to Summer for being a prop with no impact on the story whatsoever, she has already collected her prize of appearing in a full 3 panel strip this week (panels will not necessarily be consecutive).
Special thanks also go out to Les for having such an insatiable ego and such milquetoast friends and family that he will continue to receive the unearned praise he has been given for decades now.
And extra special thanks go out to Crazy Harry, who demanded nothing but 18 panels of our precious time in return for his brilliant idea of pretending Isaac Asimov invented the concept of recording video using already obsolete technology.

On the subject of 18 panels (well, 16, thanks to a couple of 2 panel strips), this new Lisa tapes origin story actually takes up more column inches than the entire original origin story AND depiction of the recording of the tapes! That took just 16 panels in four strips. For all its faults, Act II got to the point…

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Tagged as Act II, Act II tragedies, cancer, cancer films, character death, collectible garbage, Crazy, Crazy Harry, death, enraging hair strands, flashback, flashback thought bubbles, ghost Lisa, hair horn, Harry, hatchet face, helmet hair, horrible ideas, ideas, idiocy, insufferable assholes, iPad, knowing smirks, leaves, Les, Les being a giant smug douche, Lisa, Not Summer, Now Crazy Harry, obsolete video technologies, porch swing, running ideas into the ground, seldom-seen characters wearing hats, sepia-tone, sepia-toned flashback, sheer idiocy, smirk, smirks, Summer, tablet, Taj Moore-hal, tapes, technology, terrible ideas, the lisa, the Lisa tapes, those stupid tapes, Tom doesn't get women, unwarranted wry sarcasm, welcoming death, wry banter, wry weary snideness, wryness

by billytheskink | August 18, 2022 · 10:30 pm

The Les He Knows, The Better

More word zeppelins in today’s strip… Not as bad as yesterday, but still, get your bookmarks out, folks!

You know, this is actually one of TB’s tidiest retcons, probably because it is one of the very few intentional ones he’s ever undertaken. It takes the original scene and changes its context (slightly) by depicting a previously unseen scene. Tidy. The pieces actually fit together. There are no loose ends, deleted original context, or unresolved conflict with the originals scene. See? That’s not so hard.

Heck, as a bonus it even (unnecessarily but adeptly) explains a silly detail from the original scene, why Les has a camcorder and this Hari Seldon story readily at hand as if he was waiting for Lisa to lament about all the things ~~Summer~~ she will never get to experience. Turns out, he pretty much was just waiting on the chance to whip that camera on out.

Tidy as it is, this retcon was no more entertaining or less irritating because of it. In fact, it makes the origin story of the Lisa tapes tremendously off-putting. The focus shifts away from the impending reality of Summer growing up without a mother seen in the original scene to the needs of Summer’s nogoodnik parents… First, Lisa wants to record the tapes so she can live vicariously through Summer’s adolescence in her imagination. Then, Crazy and Lisa hatch this cockamamie plan to let Les take credit for the idea to record the infamous tapes, which only soothes his ego and bolsters his hero complex. These people are awful and I hope I never wind up sitting next to any of them on an airplane.

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Tagged as Act II, Act II tragedies, bad ideas, cancer, cancer films, character death, Crazy, Crazy Harry, death, enraging facial expressions, flashback, flashback thought bubbles, hatchet face, horrible ideas, ideas, impending doom, Isaac Asimov, Les, Lisa, non-pizza foodstuffs, obsolete video technologies, pop-culture references, porch swing, raging egoism, references no one gets, retcon, retcons of retcons, seldom-seen characters wearing hats, sepia-tone, sepia-toned flashback, Star Trek, Taj Moore-hal, terrible ideas, the lisa, the Lisa tapes, tiny hands, tiny trees, trees, unnatural hand gestures, welcoming death, word zeppelins, wry banter, wry self-deprecation, wry weary snideness, wryness

by billytheskink | August 17, 2022 · 10:30 pm

Hari Don’t Care-i

I’m surprised it took until today’s strip for the word zeppelins to arrive… but one has docked right at Crazy’s mouth and is unloading such a tremendous volume of technobabble that it threatens to lift the roof right off the porch of the Taj Moore-hal! In explaining the concept of recording Lisa’s advice on video, Crazy somehow spits out 60% more words than Les did in the original take on this story back in 2007. It is almost enough to make you pity Lisa, who apparently had to listen to this verbal assault twice.

Hey, I said almost…

I’m not a big Isaac Asimov guy or a sci-fi reader in general, I’ve always been very much a non-fiction reader when it comes to things that aren’t comics, so I cannot tell you how accurate or apt or idiotic or unnecessary Crazy’s rambling is (I can tell you it makes for miserable comic strip reading, but that should go without saying). I suspect we have some folks much better suited to that than me in our comments section, so I will now turn this over to my fellow SOSFers.

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Tagged as Act II, Act II tragedies, awful dialog, awful wordplay, bad wordplay, book, bug-eyes, cancer, cancer films, carousel of death, character death, Crazy, Crazy Harry, death, excessive word ballooning, false modesty, flashback, flashback thought bubbles, hatchet face, Isaac Asimov, lame wordplay, Lisa, NERDS!, porch swing, seldom-seen characters wearing hats, sepia-tone, sepia-toned flashback, sub-moronic wordplay, Taj Moore-hal, terrible wordplay, the inevitable death of the universe, the lisa, the Lisa tapes, unnatural hand gestures, wall of text, welcoming death, word zeppelins, wordplay

by billytheskink | July 7, 2021 · 10:30 pm

Haikranky

Obligatory
Haiku post for today's strip
Where nothing happens

"Who spent most of his
Time at war with the world and
Ev'rything in it"?

We talking about
Phil Holt or that Ed Crankshaft?
Both? Makes me shudder

C'mon now, Durwood
Phil did not know a dang thing
About your mother

C'mon too, Mindy
Who here cares one iota
About your granddad?

Pete here wins the strip
Only offense is a smirk
Default win's a win

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Tagged as air travel, airplanes, anger, Batom Comics, Batom's bizarre comic book fantasy world, character death, comic books, Comic-Con, comics, Crankshaft, curmudgeonly oldsters, Darin, death, Flash Freeman, melting faces, Mindy, Minty Pete, Mopey Pete, mouths way too low on the face, old crap, Old dying people, Pete, Pete's Plaid Shirt, Phil Holt, smirk, that unnamed cranky guy, the untimely death of Phil Holt, weird noses

by billytheskink | July 6, 2021 · 10:30 pm

Something’s got a Holt on me

If there was a contest to use the most words possible to say “Flash and Phil didn’t like each other”, today’s strip would definitely be a contender. Same for a most exposition crammed into a single panel contest, with panel 1 making a game effort. The only place such contests could possibly exist is, of course, the Batiukverse… so please forgive me if similar contests appear in this strip a year from now.

All that exposition in the first panel and Flash doesn’t realize the hall of fame awards given out at Comic-Con honor the deceased on the regular? Seems like having Comic-Con remotely would work well in Flash’s hypothetical honoring a live Phil Holt scenario, but since Flash doesn’t even know that dead people regularly get honored at this and other hall of fame ceremonies then it stands to reason that he wouldn’t know that Comic-Con and other events are held remotely. And by “Flash” in the previous sentence, I mean TB.

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Tagged as air travel, airplanes, awards, Batom Comics, Batom's bizarre comic book fantasy world, character death, Chester, Chester the Chiseler, comic books, Comic-Con, comics, Darin, death, Eisner Awards, embarrassing errors a comics fan shouldn't make, Flash Freeman, flight risks, not how the world works, old crap, Old dying people, Phil Holt, Ruby, Ruby Lith, silly awards, the comic book industry, the untimely death of Phil Holt, unearned awards, uninteresting stupid anecdotes, weird noses, word zeppelins

by billytheskink | April 10, 2020 · 10:30 pm

Get the Buck outta here!

We can only hope today’s strip is the awful coda to this awful story arc about these awful people.

This is why you turned down Buck’s advances, Linda? Not because he was being incredibly creepy and distasteful? Not because you are still mourning your husband who committed suicide not even 6 months ago and don’t feel like jumping into any relationship? Not because you know absolutely nothing about him beyond his high school football career? Not because the only thing you two demonstratively have in common is your late husband?

I agree with Linda on one thing, though. I can’t go through this again, either.

31 Comments

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Tagged as Batiukmobile®, boredom personified, bricks, Buck, Buck Bedlow, Bull, character death, creepiness, creepy, CTE, death, disgust, disillusionment, endless tedium, impending doom, Life is a dismal horror from which you can never escape, Linda, Linda Bushka, Old dying people, RIP Bull, sad-sackery, silhouette, Squick, things that never end, welcoming death

by billytheskink | January 14, 2020 · 10:30 pm

Die or Die Not, There Is No Try

Today’s strip takes a pre-dick-tably maudlin turn. Like we didn’t all know “Les tries to sullenly undermine this dumb movie thing” was going to be the gist of this story arc.

Even if I wasn’t short on time to write this, I’m wouldn’t archive dive to prove that Lisa did or did not say what Les is claiming at some point in time… because I can quickly and easily point to a time when she pretty much said the exact opposite.

36 Comments

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Tagged as cancer, Cayla, character death, chemotherapy, comma eyes, death, encroaching dread, Hollywood, Les, Les being a giant smug douche, Les. Cayla, Life is a dismal horror from which you can never escape, Lisa, Lisa's Story, Los Angeles, lost cause, Mason, Mason Jarr, Mason Jarre, Mason's Nose, movies, retcon, retcons of retcons, sad-sackery, sheer idiocy, sickening dread, smug inept bearded jerks, welcoming death

by billytheskink | January 7, 2020 · 10:30 pm

Re-Moore-seful

The thrilling marital back-and-forth between Les and Cayla continues in today’s strip. I don’t know about you, but I can totally relate to this. In fact, I’ve debated whether or not to take a free vacation offer from a movie star with my wife at least 4 times and I haven’t even been married a year yet!

Interestingly, Cayla tries a play out of her one-time romantic rival Susan Smith’s playbook: Threatening death if Les doesn’t do what she wants. Nice try, Cayla, but Les is an unfeeling inhuman monster. If you die, you die. He cares not, he worries only that he will miss the opportunity to condescend to teenagers.

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Tagged as Cayla, Cayla's lavender turtleneck, character death, death, first world problems, Hollywood, insufferability, Les, Les being a giant smug douche, Les. Cayla, Los Angeles, non-pizza foodstuffs, sickening dread, Westview H.S., Westview High School

Tag Archives: character death

Batiuklysm

Jumping’ Jack Flashback

Credit Fraud

The Les He Knows, The Better

Hari Don’t Care-i

Haikranky

Something’s got a Holt on me

Get the Buck outta here!

Die or Die Not, There Is No Try

Re-Moore-seful

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