Epicus Doomus
May 28, 2013 at 12:23 am
When you think about it, why would Boy Lisa be leaving? He works AND lives there, shouldn’t Frankie be the one leaving?
And why is the act of leaving taking so damn long? Darin’s started hustling Jess towards the exit as soon as Lenny mentioned their “show”, pausing only to express his indignation. Turns out that Plan B is another, darker reality show, where good guy Frankie’s paternal overtures are rebuffed by dickhead Darin.
DOlz
May 28, 2013 at 2:29 am
Ok, ok I get it TB you hate reality shows. I don’t like them either, but I don’t behave like a douche about it.
Yes, guess we can add wicked, evil “reality TV” to TB’s list of “contemporary issues affecting young adults.”
Son of Stuck Funky 
“Anything good on tonight, hon?”
“Ooooh! “Frankie’s Story”: The father of the illegitimate child borne by the subject of Les Moore’s “Lisa’s Story” wanders around town, talking to people who knew Lisa! Channel 192!”
“I have these divorce papers I need you to sign.”
Why, there would probably be DOZENS of dollars involved in a show like THAT! Just like how there must be dozens of people who think FW is well-written! Although that number does seem a tad high. But not nearly as high as Batom was when he belched forth this ponderous dud of a “story”. Frankie’s big “plan” is totally laughable and doesn’t even make any sense within the context of the story, much less in any other way. Once again The Master defies logic and expectations while wringing every bit of sense and entertainment value out of the strip. Brilliant.
At least he didn’t fail to properly document Boy Lisa & Blondie’s big angry exit which has been going on for five days or so already. Thank God Frankie didn’t try to contact Derpin by snail mail, or this thing might be going on forever.
Jukebox back, bookcase gone. Continuity, FW style.
Anyone speaking blasphemy against The Gospel of Saint Lisa will be burned at the stake! Or forced to listen to a lecture by Les. Listen to Les? No thanks, are you sure that’s enough wood?
Darrin and Josie are another 1/4″ closer to that exit door — this daily suspense is killing me! And the dialogue in that first panel cracks me up for all the wrong reasons. Sure, everyone knows Lisa — and no one has yet been able to live it down. And they’ve all already sold their souls for a host of different reasons, oddly enough, none of them having anything to do with either TV or fame.
This Plan B doesn’t seem to be featuring Dead Lisa very much, instead focusing on the trifles of the living. No thanks.
I still say that Funky really would be one of those people to do anything for a few minutes of self-proclaimed “fame” on TV..AND Crazy Harry Too.
I had faint hope that Frankie would breathe some life into Westview, but Batiuk doesn’t know what to do with him, other than draw a sneer where a smirk should be. This strip is on auto-pilot.
This whole comic strip is like a cardboard box full of rubberized idiots, who keep bouncing against one another, then caroming into the walls, then bouncing against different rubberized idiots. Then the walls again. And so on.
You know, at least the Lord of the Rings finale switched locations once in a while…
It begs to be asked why Durwood is so goddamn important for Frankie to start his reality show, in the first place. Why don’t Lenny just cast someone as Frankie’s son like all the other reality shows do? I’m sure James Van der Beek isn’t doing anything these days. He can do bland and disinterest very well.
I mean, really. Is Darrin that big a hook for this show? What demographic is he supposed to bring in? Frankie’s got the ex-cons, sexual offenders, and psychotics, and beer drinkers demographic. Is Durwood supposed to bring in the underpaid, unmotivated, over-aged fast food workers demographic?
“There is at least one comic strip artist who drew Lisa and who would sell his soul for a few awards and some recognition.”
“Instead of an interesting plot, he’ll make it about an inept conman and the angry turtle faced son who can’t make it out the door.”
“You know…the only reality about Tom Batyuck’s comic strip is that it really sucks!”
Well, why WOULDN’T the story of a man meeting his bio-son be a huge hit, in a universe where the story of an ordinary woman dying uneventfully from a fairly common disease is a best-seller being turned into a movie?
Thats his plan B?! To make Darin look like the dick, granted he’s a moron. But still if thats plan B, well Frankie you need better persuasion skills. And again where is everybody? Why isn’t Funky or someone behind them kicking Frankie and Lenny out?
So awful dialogue, characterization and events were created specifically to talk about how awful reality TV is?
The best explanation is that Batiuk wants to end this but can’t and so is deliberately making the story as poor as possible in hopes of getting it canceled. However, since this isn’t television I doubt that’s the case. The other explanation is that Batiuk has just completely lost his ability as a writer or he was always like this and previously had some editor or beta reader who pushed him to do better.
Firesign Theater already came up with the appropriate show for Westview.
“You want to do WHAT? That’s it! We’re outta here. We’re leaving. We’re going. Right now. We’re walking away from you. I mean, you are, like, totally GROSS! We’re walking out on you, even though we live and work here. I need a shower, so I’m SO outta here. We’re leaving right this instant. Going now. Right now. Won’t talk about this DISGUSTING subject another second! Because we’re OUT OF HERE! Leaving. Walking out that door. Going. We’re history. Conversation over! GOOD. BYE. Okay, that’s all. We’re gone. Walking away. Oooooh, you make us so maaaaaad!!! We’re going away from you now!!”
Sweet Lord Jesus Christ in Heaven. Did Ayrhead nudge TomHole awake one night and make a bet about how long he could drag this schlock out without moving the story along?
Of all the dialogues in all the pizza joints in all the depressing dinky towns with dead women who had illegitimate sons, in all the world, this is the dumbest.
And you know what else, pal? You know what? I’ll tell you what else. Reality TV stinks! Yeah, you heard me. Take THAT! It STINKS! In fact, it REALLY stinks! How do you like that, huh? How do you feel now?
It.
STINKS!!!
“We are OUT of here! Don’t even THINK about following us into the parking lot, because we’ll be happy to stick around for a few minutes longer! But after that… we are OUT of here…!”
Yes! Plan B! The B stands for “Boring”, by the way.
6 hours later…
Durrhey: Heyyyyy, wait a minute! I live and work in this pizza joint! Maybe you should be the one starting to leave, bio-dad!
FTR: Come on, Lenny. I had no idea the kid would be too stupid for reality TV!
So, there really is an audience out there that will watch two, no make that three, unemployed jerks, on a TV show? What is it going to be, a remake of the Three Stooges?
No one gives a shit about Lisa outside of Les’ inner circle, and that’s tenuous at best. Say that you COULD make a reality show out of it. Wouldn’t you pitch it to the company making that crappy straight-to-cellphone production instead of this chump who has nothing to do with the movie?
I’ve seen episodes of Scooby Doo that make more sense than this.
I gotta agree with TB on this one. Reality TV is a cesspool.
Makes for a boring comic storyline, but he is right.
–I’ve seen episodes of Scooby Doo that make more sense than this.–
…And they all guest star The Harlem Globetrotters.
Man, the Montoni’s front door must be ten thousand subjective miles away.
In other news, you get the feeling this whole “reality TV” is something Tom kind of, sort of dislikes? Hmmm.
“…Okay, that’s it! We’re GOING now! Here we go. Out that door. Right now. Look at our Angry Turtle Faces. But look quick because in 2 seconds we’re leaving! I really mean it this time. Oooooooh, we are soooo maaaaaaad!! Let’s get outta here. We’re finished talking about this stinky poopie reality TV! Finished! Turning around and walking OUT that door! My GAWSH, are we offended! So that’s it, we’re getting outta here! Gonna go right now, because we have heard ENOUGH! We’re leaving now. Let’s go. Right now. Oooooh, this is all SO STINKY!!!!…”