Edit Profile

Maybe Wally’s “not very good at picking up cues,” but he is good at morphing his facial features. Check out his profile in panel three: gone are his hawk nose and sunken cheeks! He looks more like a movie star and less like Boomhower, for once. It must be love.

22 thoughts on “Edit Profile”

  2. So, um, who -is- watching Rachel’s kid? It’s pitch black out! Can she really afford good babysitters on her measly wage and sequester-slashed benefits?

  5. John: “So, um, who -is- watching Rachel’s kid? It’s pitch black out!”

    Rachel took the afternoon off to watch Wally empty his spit-valve, so her kid’s working her shift at Montoni’s. It’s okay if she’s out unnecessarily late, because Comix Corner is right upstairs and Skunkhead said he doesn’t mind keeping an eye on the boy.

  6. “And do you, Rachel, take Wally (and his Buddy!) to be your lawfully official Westviewian Death Pact partner, to bury and or cremate, in sickness and in sickness, until the book about your death is published and optioned into a made-for-TV film?”

    “Squeeeeeee! I do!”

    “Then by the power vested in me by the Westview Chamber Of Commerce, I pronounce you badly-aging husband and soon-to-be-obese wife. You may now wryly smirk while being playfully badgered by the bride.”

    Seriously though, the “wedding episode” trope…talk about running out of ideas. If you insist upon re-visiting characters absolutely no one cares about at all simply to satisfy your own self-indulgence, then why write them a story that reeks of hacky, cheesy laziness? It’s one of the most confounding of FW’s many paradoxes…”why bother?” vs. “if you’re going to bother, why this?”.

  7. Alright, besides the fact that I have no freaking clue how long these people have been there it’s not that bad today, with one exception. I realize that Batiuk isn’t the best at art, but what in hell happened to Rachel from panel 2 to 3? I might just be mean and unfair, but 2 looks like she’s a mad stalker while 3 looks normal!

  9. Tom Batiuk: So, America will you shower me with praise and prizes?
    America (muttering): (Cough) No.
    Tom Batiuk: I’ve just made you the luckiest audience on the planet. Prepare to bestow praise upon the great author.
    America: No thanks. I’m now depressed. And what’s wrong with Rachel’s face in panel two?
    Tom Batiuk: What?
    America: You’re still not very good at picking up on cues, are you?

  11. Oh no, Rachel said the “H” word out loud with no lead lined ceiling to protect her and we all know what that means. I’m betting on either Meniere’s disease or a rattlesnake bite.

  13. Oh Boy!! Another Montoni’s wedding reception coming up. Do you think Funky will give Wally the day off or will he have to wash the dishes for his own wedding? Also, yes it’s curious how children only seem to appear when they’re needed for the punch line of some bad joke, then they’re never heard from again. Rachel’s kid and Crazy Harry’s kids must all live in the same orphanage together.

  14. “Are those my cues?”
    “Yes, and they must be dry by now. Why don’t you pull them up out of the cellophane before they scorch…”

  15. HaHaHaHa!!!! This qualifies for one of the most unintentionally funny comic strips ever!!!! Tom Batiuk’s clumsy writing skills have actually produced a memorable comedic moment!!

    I mean serious ladies, Wally Winkerbeans, blase “So?” is a priceless reaction to a woman pouring her heart out!! I’m sure the intention was for Wally to mean “So…will you marry me?” But the whole set up and Wally’s bland face make it seem like he’s really meaning ” So….who gives a rat’s ass if your the happiest girl in the world, you gonna marry me our what you stupid twat!!”

    I could see a series a strips like this.

    “Wally I’m pregnant with our first child?”
    “So?”

    “Wally you just won the Powerball!!”
    “So?”

    “Wally! World Peace has been declared and all disease has been”cured!!!
    “So?”

  16. It’s got all the spontaneity of the proposal in Walt Disney’s Robin Hood with none of the swashbuckling action, romantic banter, interesting characters, or talking animals. The spontaneity is good… and maybe the no talking animal thing.

  18. I don’t mind the storyline — it’s not nearly as lame as any of Les’s proposals — but the silhouette in Panel 1 looks incredibly awkward. It looks like Wally is clutching both of Rachel’s hands, except there’s this other hand still holding the I.O.U. note in the air. Maybe it’s Becky’s lost appendage. If this panel was my introduction to this current storyline, I might assume these two spent the night digging up the grave near the band gazebo where Becky’s detached arm had been buried years ago. And look! It’s clutching a note. By gosh, Becky’s arm has given its consent for Wally to remarry and start the next chapter of his life! Hooray!

  19. Perhaps Wally is morphing into an African-American man, to fill the interracial couple void created when Cayla turned… whatever it was that she turned.

  21. “You’ve just made me the happiest girl on the planet!”

    Why?

    It’s a total cliche, and that’s bad enough, but Jesus, what’s the draw of this guy that would justify that reaction? He has no personality. He works for his cousin as a dishwasher. He’s so emotionally compromised that he needs a dog to follow him around everywhere lest he murder someone. He’s a whiner and he has no sense of humor, and he just handed her an IOU on an engagement ring because he’s too cheap to buy one. And every time the country goes to war, he gets captured and promptly forgotten about.

    So we’re supposed to believe this?

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