The Be-tr-owe-thal

It’s an I.O.U. for an engagement ring.” Y’know, Wally, lots of guys decide to pop the question even if they don’t have the scratch for a diamond ring. But a written I.O.U.? Weak, dude. A two bit ring from a Crackerback jox would’ve been preferable to that. No doubt a Niagara Falls honeymoon is in store…fifty years from now.


Filed under Son of Stuck Funky

17 responses to “The Be-tr-owe-thal

  1. merrypookster

    Dude… you’re a douchebag +++
    Are there no real men in Westview?
    or in any attic in Medina?

  2. I hate to rain on the band (see what I did there?) but I don’t think this will be a happy union. Wally is a damaged man-child who seems slow to try and climb out of his sad state; Rachel treats him, at best, like a nurse with an eternal patient, meaning she actively wants to keep him as a near infant who requires a constant mother.

    If she wants another child (Wally), shouldn’t she show she’s capable by doing something with the child she already has?

  3. Epicus Doomus

    Just think: this is only the SECOND-saddest proposal in the history of that f*cking park. If you missed the first one, consider yourself lucky.

    Look at this…a middle-aged single mother and self-professed pizza shop “lifer” accepts a paper engagement ring I.O.U. from a grinning idiot after a date that consisted of watching him play his trombone in the town square while spewing saliva all over his dog. And it’s supposed to be a HAPPY occasion. No wonder everything’s blue, it’s completely appropriate. Only in the Batiukiverse.

    So is all that blue lighting responsible for turning Rachel’s hair blonde or is it just another example of weird coloring in the Sunday strip? Because it was clearly bright red-orange earlier this week. But hey, it’s only the character’s sole defining trait, no biggie.

  4. A HREF

    OK, I will bite. What was the saddest marriage proposal? Les and Lisa?

  5. Epicus Doomus

    A HREF: That’d be Les’ lumpy proposal to Cayla a few years back.

  6. “Just say yes! I have to tell you what to do and what opinions to have just to create the illusion that you want to spend your life with me! This marriage is going to rock!”

    I think every woman in the Funkyverse should make the first move from now on, just to save the audience from the men’s creepy dialogue.

  7. Sgt. Saunders

    What a hopelessly cheap gesture…and doesn’t Nurse Rache’d already spend substantially every waking (and sleeping – boom chicka wow wow) hour with Wally? After this magnanimous display, you’d think Wally would know the old saying – why buy the cow when you can get the sex for free.

  8. Gyre

    I wouldn’t nitpick this if it weren’t for the fact that they’ve gotten her hair color right for days now. She’s not a blonde. This isn’t just a trick from the lights around them, there are several points where her hair should be much redder than this.

  9. Professor Fate

    1 – Rache is German for Revenge – per AC Doyle “A Study in Scarlet,”
    2 – “Yes marry me and together we’ll share a lifetime of misery, dashed hopes, despair; and crushing depression followed by cancer.”
    3. I thought she was a redhead?
    4. Oh, the Suspense will the blonde lady marry the eanimated corpse?

  10. John

    Wally, Wally, Wally. Next time when you watch a sappy romantic comedy with Rachel, realize the reason why she seems to adore the eccentrically clueless heroes of such films is because she’s doing her part as the audience to suspend her disbelief.

    In real life (and, one assumes, in “a quarter of an inch of reality”), guys who do such loopy, stupid gestures as this not only don’t get married, they make it clear they haven’t the slightest idea how a real, living, complicated human being actually works.

    What I’m trying to say is…even a character in a Katherine Heigl film would roll their eyes at this. 😛

  11. Rusty

    How many orchestra members could one actually cram into that gazebo?
    Thomas Batiuk, Master of Light®.


    Well…they do say that an engagement ring should cost three months of salary. In Wally’s case he has no income and is drowning in debt…. So, yeah. I guess an IOU promise of a ring in three months would be appropriate here. Though if I were Rachel I would ask if that IOU has priority over the credit card companies and the cable company.

  13. MKay

    Mop the floor at Montoni’s! It’s time for another society page gala!

  14. I’m not saying you need a bunch of roses and singing choirs and fireworks spelling her name out above a stadium Jumbotron to make a proposal special, but for crying out loud, Wally, at least put a little more feeling and effort into it than “Oh by the way, I scribbled out something on a Post-It note in lieu of the ring I can’t afford right now. What are you waiting for, say yes!”

  15. John

    “In Wally’s case he has no income and is drowning in debt”

    Debt for what?!? He lives a pretty austere life, from what we’ve seen, and -should- be receiving a not inconsiderable amount of financial assistance to supplement the three dollars a year he makes slinging dough at Montoni’s.

  16. merrypookster

    Reminiscent of Tom’s romancing his wife?

  17. O.B. Dan

    I got Waldo’s “I.O.U.” line…awkwardly romantic…