December 2013 – Page 5 – Son of Stuck Funky

Holy Fail

“Another universe“? “Secret password“? “A journey of biblical proportions“? For fuck’s sake, we’re talking about comic books! Dead Skunk Head John’s (and Tom Batiuk’s) favoritest things in the world! And rather than directly answer Holly’s question (said answer being “Oh, hells yes”), John climbs into his Comic Book Guy pulpit and starts spewing his jibba jabba. The punchline fails because John clearly is speaking English. Panel 3 would be funnier without dialogue: just Holly standing there with a blank expression. Wait: that would fail too, though, since Holly’s expression is always blank…

I mean no disrespect to real-world comic book aficionados; I know that there are some of you reading this blog. But the majority of folks don’t know or care about comic books. Question for comics fans: Batiuk’s writing this with you in mind…do you find any of it amusing?

John the Revelator

Whatever the hell that means. Biblical? In what sense? She’s looking to acquire a bunch of old comic books; her quest will likely be very costly and time-consuming. Epic, even. Where does he get biblical?

Pop the Korner

Holly carries her bulk up the stairs to the Komix Korner. Speaking of bulk, Owen’s goatee does little to conceal his double chin; when did that happen? That flight of stairs is probably the only exercise that any of the characters in today’s strip get.

Anyway, business at the Korner seems to have picked up since last December: not only can John now afford a nicer Christmas tree, but he’s sporting one of those cool t-shirts with a Batman logo that magically disappears!

‘Goats of a Chance

The die is cast: Skyler is destined to attend Westview High and become the star quarterback who finally makes a winning team of the Scapegoats. Check out the futuristic football helmets! Check out that throwing stance (just like Jarod)! Check out how baby Skyler is already sitting up on his own at two weeks of age!

Across the Funkiverse

Holly’s Komix Kwest 4 Kory has yet to take her beyond the Westview city limits. Today she browbeats Crazy Harry into revisiting the humiliating circumstances that led him to sell off his most prized possessions. You’d think Harry might know whether or not Komix Korner has sold his Starbuck Jones comic, given that Harry now works there.