“What do you want, Geek? Credits?” our current strip seems to ask, as if Holly were some alternate, Klingon-like version of our rotund Winkerspouse.
Later, at home, Nick the Geek will hold up Holly’s Drug City discount card, and muse to his wife: “Can you imagine that? She offered this to me as if it was really worth something. Poor old gal.”
His wife will recall vaguely that such cards were worth something once, long ago, in the before time. “Sure,” Nick will reply, “about a hundred years or so ago, before they passed the Affordable Life Amendment,” and will toss the plastic card into the fuel cell.
On the plus side, Starbuck Jones dies in the first panel.
Son of Stuck Funky 
I have always wondered why Cory was so spoiled, surly, and full of himself. But when you see how Holly acts in routine situations — panicking, making a huge scene, wasting money, groveling before bewildered strangers — it seems so obvious now. I can imagine it now.
Holly: “Won’t you go to school? You’ve been at home for two weeks now.”
Corey: “I don’t wanna.”
Holly freaks out, tugs at her collar, and flopsweats. She starts tearing open presents under the Christmas tree and dumping them in front of her son.
Holly: “Here are all of your presents two weeks early! Just please go to school! I’ll buy you more!”
What? Ow, I think my breakdown over the comic books a couple of days ago hit me harder than I thought. Is this a joke or is that what was actually in the comic strip?
“Well, that’s nice, lady. But it really wasn’t “money” that I was looking for. Unfortunately judging by the fact that your ass is the size of a Honda Civic’s trunk, I’ll think I’ll pass and just accept your shitty drugstore card. Ugh…you really take the fun out of “ass, grass or cash”, you know that ,lady? Woof!”
“The Death of Starbuck Jones”? Well, if she was smart she’d just get that one and tell Cory it was the end of the series.
Nick the Geek backs up, holding his hands in front of him. “Lady, geez, take it easy…it’s worth about a dollar, so–uh–a dollar fifty? Just so’s I can keep my ‘Caveat Emptor’ sign?”
“The Death Of Starbuck Jones”…a Batom Production…what a surprise. What I don’t get is why Holly has to be such a blithering imbecile about her stupid quest. You’d think she’d have picked up a little comic book savvy along the way but nope, she’s a total moron, maybe even dumber than when she started.
Well, actually, I DO get it…it’s the easiest possible way to “tell” this story, the one that requires the least thought and least effort. Just keep pounding away at that premise, over and over again…no room for any sort of personal growth or anything else that might move the “story” along, like asking this Nick guy what the price is, for example. What a hack.
Nick the Geek has the slightly perplexed expression I think we’d all have if we were suddenly confronted with the Westviewites in all their neurotic glory.
# 54 still 10 cents
@merrypookster: Starbuck Jones was always in the bargain section of the store. Kind of like generic corn pops or froot loops.
Dumping a waterfall of bills from a purse? It would be more realistic throw sacks marked with $ at Nick the Terry Bollea doppelganger.
Whatcha gonna do, Holly, when Starbuckamania runs wild on you?
I’m beginning to think that Tom Batiuk has been watching Pawn Stars recently. This plot seems to vaguely remind me of that show. Well I guess we should give Batty points for at least keeping abreast of modern pop culture. Admittedly though in the the stupidest way possible.
I am just glad to see S o f S back. Couldn’t access since the 11th.
Missed you guys.
What a stupid story arch.
@$$$WESTVIEW ONCOLOGIST$$$, but, but that’s an evil reality show! TB wouldn’t watch something like that on his B&W 1955 Dumont TV.
Wouldn’t the comic be devalued? I notice it’s not in a protective cover, he’s holding it so the staples will come out of the binding, and he’s got his dirty mitts on it. Offer him a quarter, tops, Holly.
Doesn’t TB know any women? Those of us Holly’s age don’t carry loose bills in a purse, we tuck them into a wallet — whereas young women don’t seem to carry cash at all, just debit cards. No American woman can turn her purse upside down onto a counter & shake piles of bills out of it.
Apauled, it’s things like that loose bills thing that make me think that someone snuck in a parody strip and nobody noticed.
This strip is an insult to one-celled animals.
I mean, Gross John treats Holly with such palpable disdain, which is fairly common yet unfair treatment for women in this situation, but apparently it’s acceptable because she really is that much of an idiot. And then all you apparently have to do is wear some leather and it gets Holly to shit her pants, in a way I suppose we’re supposed to sympathize with. People in leather really are that intimidating, in fact.
Could you imagine how this would look if Batiuk had made our stereotypical biker a black man?
What, no comments about how three of the issues she named off in the previous strip come AFTER the death issue? 😉
What, no comments about how three of the issues she named off in the previous strip come AFTER the death issue?
Oh, as if that ever means anything. Batiuk himself shows how easily that can be worked around by having Lisa be one of the five most significant characters in FW ten years after she’s died.