He’s trying for “menacing” here but he’s stuck on “clown shoes” again. Not only do I have no idea what Plantman is jabbering about, but I am at a complete loss to explain why Jessica is STILL not operating her camera, which was ostensibly her entire reason for this ponderous prison visit in the first place.
I, like 100% of the rest of the world, never read “John Darling” so I have absolutely no idea what the back story on “Plantman” is or why he’s dressed up like a plant or why it’s supposed to be funny. I am assuming that “Plantman” was to JD as Larry “Bud” Melman was to Letterman…a comedic stooge used to fill and kill time when necessary. Now I know way more about “JD” than I ever dreamed possible and yet, somehow, I still feel unfulfilled.
So this Mossman guy really did dress up like shrubbery? I don’t get it. Was he some sort of lawn & garden expert or something? Wait…do NOT answer that, I don’t want to learn more.
Son of Stuck Funky 
A Bloody Mary as an evening cocktail? Christ, what an asshole.
Plantman dresses like a bush, even in public, then wonders why he gets no respect.
Dude, you’re at a business dinner dressed like a ficus. “Respect” is not a reasonable goal at this point.
So was it a costume or was he actually covered with leaves? And is this supposed to pass as the motive for the crime? And if he was angered by JD’s jibes why is he smiling stupidly like that?
If you substitute Batiuk for Plantman and Les Moore for John Darling, this arc becomes much more entertaining.
If only someone just opened a spot for this guy on Hollywood Squares, John Darling might still be alive. I blame blame Florence Henderson for this!!
Wait, is this a flashback to a sketch from John Darling’s talk show, or did he actually go out to restaurants like that?
I’ll take Gavin Macleod for the block!
Seriously, What?
I have been reading this strip since 1970whatever, but this week makes no sense at all!
From Marvel Comics 1963:
A poor London orphan, Samuel Smithers found refuge and work as a lab assistant with a famous botanist who was researching the intelligence of plant life. After the botanist’s death, Smithers traveled to the United States, hoping to pick up where his mentor left off — inventing a device capable of communicating with plants. Smithers was laughed out of the scientific community and could only find work as a gardener. However, a freak lightning storm struck Smithers’ plant ray-gun, allowing it to control and animate plant life. With his “Vege-ray” and a disguise as the Plantman, Smithers wanted revenge on his former employers
This storyline has been done before by Krusty the Klown and Sideshow Bob on The Simpsons.
And better.
And funnier.
So, this guy dresses like a talking ficus as a silly, attention getting stunt and kills Darling for exploiting his stupidity? Sounds legit…..
What’s The Human Ficus bitching about, JD bought him a drink. If you’re dressed link a damn shrubbery in public, a mild joke like “bring him a drink in a watering can” is pretty mild.
Not if you’re a thin-skinned idiot who lives in the Batiukverse, it isn’t. Here he is, VOLUNTARILY dressing up like a houseplant and if anyone laughs, it’s not because he’s a ridiculous fool with an inflated ego, it’s because they’re bad. What Girl With Daddy Issues needs to do is to tell him to shut his pout-hole and get over himself.
Pete Moss minus “-man”
Justifies Darling’s murder
Most readers agree
Jess’ interview
Is off the record thus far
Is she short on tape?
Jess realizes
The root of the problem was
Her dad, John Darling
I do not envy
Whoever is tasked with
Pruning the Plantman
Odd that Reed Roberts
John Darling’s news director
Would name his son Pete
May explain why Pete
Is creepy, one more haiku
Predicting week’s end
Common ground is found
Both share an interest in
Vintage Betacams
Pretty inventive haikus.
Anyway, one of the people on NJ pointed out that this might be the act. The reason I didn’t think of that myself is that frankly, it’s an awful act apparently. That’s the kind of joke you make in real life to have fun, not to entertain.
Borrowing from Paul Jones, I think we can agree that this sentence works wonders in all occasions:
“What [Funky Winkerbean character 1] needs to do is to tell [Funky Winkerbean character 2] to shut his/her pout-hole and get over him/herself.”
Seriously, this would work just as well with Plantman saying something like that to Jessica. “NO ONE liked your dad, John Darling, who was murdered! You’re not going to find some hidden depth in him, so you may as well stop now! Face it–the crime was only solved because Les Moore had some time on his hands!“
Bravo billytheskink for putting more creativity and effort into those haiku than TB put into this entire story arc!
Inside Jessica: “Wow, this asshole really had it in for my Dad, John Darling. He’s a raving lunatic! Boy, this will make for a great climax! Glad I’m filming this or…oh, wait…lolwut?”
Seriously, great stuff there billytheskink.