Ah! Christmas in Westview, where the yellow cabs are orange and you exit the cab and walk around to the driver’s side window to settle up your fare. The sight of Mom and Dad trimming the tree brings a skull-splitting smile to Cpl. Cory’s face.
26 thoughts on “A Very Cory Christmas”
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Son of Stuck Funky 
Given how crappy the art has been lately, it wouldn’t surprise me if that was Rocky or some other soldier coming to tell Holly and Funky about Cory dying.
So, Cory tells the cabbie to “keep the change,” showing he has moved on from stealing from charities. If I may be permitted to quote myself–
[The redemption of Cory needs] one Sunday strip, during the holiday season when Cory was back in Westview.
Panel one-the logo, with a smirking Cory head.
In the strip, Les goes out to the mailbox. Inside is a single envelope, addressed “For: the Lisa’s Legacy Fund.” Les opens the envelope, and there’s money inside, along with an unsigned note: “Plus interest!”
Les looks at the money and gasps. “Why, there must be almost eleven dollars here!”*
Cut to: Cory, dressed in his uniform and hiding behind a nearby tree, watching all of this happen and smirking to beat the band.
*I refuse to believe that the Lisa’s Legacy Run in Westview has ever raised more than eleven dollars.
I sure home someone will send me a royalty check!
Well, hot diggity damn. Corey lived.
FYI, there are scattered taxi services in Northeastern Ohio… nothing close to the Yellow Cab lines. IIRC, they actually ARE colored orange.
In some areas, the Yellow Cabs are actually more orange than yellow. Go figure.
Ya got me, guys. I’ve seen taxis in lotsa colors. Even in New York City, there are “boro taxis” whose color is “a cross between piss yellow and puke green (to quote American Graffiti). Honestly, today’s strip was so light on content I had to find something to pick on. And you’ve gotta think the comic colorist might, just might go with yellow for a taxi.
Compared to Dinkle’s decapitating smirk as he passed by his daughter’s La-La Land last month (I’d embed it, but idk how to embed images in the comments for some reason) Corey’s (?) unrealistic smile looks normal by comparison.
Heh, I think this was the same colorist who magically turned redhead Rachel into a blonde right as she married Wally.
Glad ya brought up the 12/1 strip! It gives me an opportunity to link to this great parody from Tumblr.
Considering how ashen Cory is in this strip, are we sure he’s not dead? Maybe we’re being set up for Carnival of Cory.
No, that would be interesting.
I suppose the big question is if Holly is at long last going to wrap up the huge Starbuck Jones mega-arc by finally giving the Corporal the completed collection, plus that special rendition issue (or whatever the hell it was) that gave that comic book dork a coronary that time at the big local garage-con. I mean what better time than Christmas, right? It’s sort of what I always assumed would happen, thus it probably won’t and he’ll find some other creative way to keep the SJ thing going indefinitely on an “oh no it’s still not over” basis.
Otherwise though, hey, if land mine removal has made the Corporal a better person than I’m all for it. In his case the downside is vastly outweighed by the upside, so there you go. He got home for Christmas in one piece which is rare for Westviewians who’ve never left town, much less ones who’ve diffused bombs in Afghanistan.
“… and it turned out he was a ghost the whole time.”
Nahh, too imaginative.
Cheer up, guys: Cory could still slip on the icy sidewalk and break his neck just in time for Christmas. (and I’d love to see how badly Batiuk can draw a mangled body in that situation)
Cory should revert to his childhood instincts and throw a rock through the window.
I knew it–going for the schmaltz this year.
Of course, Ma and Pa Winkerbean think so little of their kid that they didn’t even bother to pick him up at the airport, so there’s a little bit of that good old fashioned Funkytown Depression for you traditionalists.
People who are mentally well don’t smile like this.
Wouldn’t the parents be picking him up at the airport, maybe? I guess I’m just thinking of my own parents. Huh.
Watch this. He’ll be boasting about how they’ve made the whole Starbucks Jones series available online. It cost him a mint but he got the lot without having to hunt it down like an idiot. That’ll make Holly look like a fool AND allow Batiuk to whine about the evil interwebs,
I’m guessing there’s a reason we don’t see Cory below the waist. It’s the big prosthetic reveal on Christmas Day.
An Amazon.com special delivery for the holidays!
The only way the Starbuck Jones storyline continues from here is if it is inexplicabaly tied into the Dick Tracy crossover.
Which is possible, as Joe Staton’s cover he drew for Batom® also appeared in a Dick Tracy strip (look VERY carefully at the throwaway panel and the sixth panel).
As usual, sentiment in this strip is rediculously and insultingly forced. Cory’s back. Who cares? He’s not even Funky’s kid and he was a horrible child to both he and Holly. Shortly before I stopped reading the strip for awhile, Cory was still below something that crawled out of the primordial ooze. Did the little punk do *anything* to redeem himself or make himself even slightly likeable before Batiuk fell back on the Afghanistan crutch again?
I’d even suggest that Batom® got tired of Corey as a delinquent, so this was a lazy way to reboot his character. Funky seems to sorta care about his stepson now… I guess. Brace yourself for yet another ridiculous retcon.
And in retrospect, Batom® couldn’t kill or maim Corey, lest it negatively impact his obvious pet project, that being the “Holly lucks into completing the Starbuck Jones collection” arc. Of course it’s going to have a happy ending, schmaltz and all.
And this continues to reinforce that last week’s mishmash was the remains of an aborted storyline that was going to put the Funk Man through unbelievable levels of misery. It would have been mood whiplash untenable even by Batom®’s standards…
that is one horrible face in that last panel.
I have the horrible feeling that the comics collection will be the maguffin in the Dick Tracy thing.
“that is one horrible face in that last panel.”
He’s probably just realized his “parents” are both deaf and blind because they haven’t noticed a single thing outside the living room window just a few feet from where they are…………………
Batik wants us to forget that Cory actually came home last Christmas. This is a re-run. Wouldn’t it be nice if all soldiers deployed overseas got every Christmas off to go home like Cory does?