You Got the Silver

What’s my opinion, Bernie? How about this: next time the school levy fails to pass, my opinion is that the school could save some budget by doing away with “The Bleat.” I’d also recommend giving the boot to clueless, ineffectual teachers like Mr. Moore and Mrs. Bushka, but sadly, they’re tenured in. “Tenure” must also explain why past-their-prime, mirthless franchises such as Funky Winkerbean (and Crankshaft) continue to occupy the ever shrinking amount of real estate allotted to newspaper comics.

It’s been my honor to share the FW misery with you these past couple weeks. Though I am loathe to give away spoilers, TB has already teased in his blog about next week’s “prestige” arc, ripped from last year’s headlines, and comicbookharriet will break it all down for you starting tomorrow.



Filed under Son of Stuck Funky

18 responses to “You Got the Silver

  1. Rusty shackleford

    No Batty no. You aren’t helping your art, you are cheapening it. Better artists than you retired early, but you seem content to milk the clock. It would seem to me, a real artist would want to leave on a high note…but not you, just working for a living. Putting out crap till you can’t crap no more.

    Please Batty, retire already and get on with your life.

    • Double Sided Scooby Snack

      Other than reading komix on the floor of his mom’s attic and yelling downstairs for more hot cocoa, what exactly would that consist of?

  2. Count of Tower Grove

    “Prestige arc,” now that’s Pulitzer material!

    • Double Sided Scooby Snack

      Marching. Protesting. Aging ex-hippie Batyurch continues his never ending search for recognition and awards.This activity must have cut deeply into his komix reading and creeping around the local high school time.

      But who am I to mock Batnuts for his supposed convictions? Maybe he’s actually figured out a way to remove guns from our society — including from the Bad Guys. And by “Bad Guys,” I mean violent criminals, not people who vote down wasteful tax increases. That’s the maddening thing about Bad Guys — WE pass laws restricting purchase and ownership of firearms, and THEY keep acquiring, having them, and using them. It’s almost as if Bad Guys don’t GIVE half a shit about laws and stuff.

      But look for BatDope to take a hard hitting stance on this issue. Guessing a member of the football team (surprise!) brings a gun to school. Endless hoo-ha ensues. In the end, nothing will happen and nothing will be decided.

      On the other hand, if Goatee Boy becomes a tragic victim, I’d be okay with the whole thing.

      • Rusty Shackleford

        We know he will just parrot some dusty old leftist tripe that even today’s liberals will find unappetizing. Does he really think people will learn something from his strip? I’m sure his ego tells him yes, but like you said, we know he is just chasing his next award.

        • If he bothers to even do that–parrot on old opinion. Most of Batiuk’s “dealing with the issues” is simply to state that such an issue exists, then preen about mentioning it.

  3. Epicus Doomus

    Yes, because comic books and these kids today and ha ha ha. All in all it’s hardly the most annoying Sunday strip I’ve ever seen, but then again Les is in it, so it gets nine thumbs-down by default. That’s minus four stars if you want it in metric. That makes this one of of the top ten FW strips of 2019 so far, which is like getting an award at work for clogging up the toilet the fewest number of times.

    Whenever I see Bernie I can’t help but wonder what Cody, Owen and Alex are up to these days. I assume Cody dropped out of KSU a few years ago and now works at his stepfather’s used car lot, while I likewise assume that Owen and Alex are squatting in an abandoned house on the wrong side of Westview, selling stolen scrap metal to fund their habits, but you never know. That Owen had some real comic book savvy, IMO he had a future in that town.

    But it really is pretty weird how the entire Act III WHS generation just dropped off the map, you know? Summer, Keisha, Jinx, that other one, Owen, Cody…they all just basically vanished. Watch your back, Bern.

    • Saturnino

      Bernie will be the far away monument to success of the class while all the popular kids who were voted most likely to succeed/etc. will be utter failures and die early miserable deaths (IOW, good Westview citizens).

  4. billytheskink

    A word, Les… about your teaching…

    “Awful” is the first one that comes to mind, followed by “nonexistent” and “sucks”.

  5. ian'sdrunkenbeard

    “Dammit, Bernie! Your opinions on which faculty members you would fuck, marry, or kill does not constitute an editorial!”

  6. The Nelson Puppet

    comic book jokes…

  7. spacemanspiff85

    So, nobody screens this ahead of time? They just let teenagers say whatever the hell they want on a live camera? That seems incredibly bad.

  8. spacemanspiff85

    Also, can we please have one character who isn’t obsessed with comics? I mean damn, if you want a nerd stereotype character there are a ton of other things to be nerdy about. Star Wars, Star Trek, D&D, video games, etc. But that would require Batiuk to not indulge his obsession every chance he gets. Also, Foxtrot has been doing geek humor way better than Batiuk ever could for decades. I’m pretty sure talking about Hulk and Iron Man doesn’t even qualify as geek anymore. Heck, thanks to the MCU “Groot vs. Thanos” wouldn’t.

    • Paul Jones

      For him to not do that would be like admitting to making a huge mistake he can never walk back. I’m not talking about killing Lisa….I’m talking about the teen pregnancy arc that no one really wanted or needed, not even the poor sap craving legitimacy. Deep in his heart, he must know that he made a wrong turning for a foolish reason but he can never admit it.

  9. Charles

    Hey! It’s Lumpy Black Guy with the receding hairline of a 55 year-old man! Seriously, not even one follicle on the front half of his head.

    • Double Sided Scooby Snack

      Well, when Batty looks in the mirror, that’s what he sees. He figures EVERYBODY is severely balding.

      I did not recognize Nameless Black Guy. Thought he was an adult on a professional crew assigned to the Morning Announcement Action News Team.

  10. Paul Jones

    How does this tie into a school shooting arc? Does someone disagree with Bernie about a fantasy fist fight?

  11. Double Sided Scooby Snack

    Hey, say hello again to Batty’s only attempt at a Jewish character, Bernie Silverberg. Batty doesn’t encounter many actual Jewish people, so he feels free to pack in as many stereotypes as he’s heard of. For that reason, don’t be surprised that Bernie is a short, chubby, four-eyed nerd. He’s the Jewish Owen, with that one baseball undershirt he always wears. Owen had his wool hat, Maddie (remember her??) had her rats nest hair with an army cap on top. Clothing obsession seems to be a real thing with Batty teenagers.

    BatWit and his characters cry “poor” and curse the tight-fisted villagers for continually voting down the school levy tax grab, yet they can afford a fully equipped modern TV studio and staff. Imagine that!

    The Lord Of Language, apparently between book tours, seems surprised that a nerdy kid wants to talk about komix bookx. On the other hand, he’s WAAAAAY too important and busy to advise his students on content.

    Tune in next week as Bernie (played by a young Chaim Yankel) eats a box of matzoh and a plate of gefilteh fish in the cafeteria while setting up loans for his fellow students.