beckoningchasm

We Have a Funeral Coming Up – It’s Yours

I realize that every episode is a waste of a day, but this one really lives up to the strip’s reputation. We’re apparently going to get an entire week of this Reverend asking Dinkle if he can provide music at a funeral. And just the asking part, I’ll wager.

There’s an old rule about doing presentations for the public – Tell them what you’re going to say; say it; and then tell them what you’ve said. Batiuk has really taken that one to heart, to the point where he’s added several more copies of the same steps. The last step, of course, is to tell everyone how brave and innovative and deserving of praise you are.

I Thought I Heard Cats Howling

Link to today’s strip.

Oh good, Dinkle again. Like Les, a character where “a little” is “way too much.”

I assume that we’re going to get full on Dinkle until the Rose Bowl parade, where he’s going to be given a middle-finger salute. Oh…I can just feel the joy oozing out of me.

Another assumption is that the Hanna-Barbera character appearing here is the Minister or Reverend or Priest of this parish. If so, Dinkle will not be asked for “a favor.” He’ll be asked to do his damned job the way the M/R/P wants it done, or he’ll be hurled into the sun.

This is one of the reasons that I loathe Dinkle more than Les. He’s always assumed to be completely in charge of whatever situation he finds himself, with full control of every resource. And he then turns those situations into a celebration of his ego. No doubt, the Rose Bowl parade will suffer the same fate, as he’s called on to direct it in its entirety, rather than appear as a guest.

Hurling into the sun is too good for him. What’d the sun ever do to us?

Stark Contrast

Link to today’s strip.

Ah–the penny drops. Now we know why we had to revisit Holly’s broken limb–because Tom Batiuk saw a cast-type thing on someone’s leg and thought, “Hey, that looks like Iron Man’s boot!”

Before you say, “Oh, pshaw! No one would do that!” remember this is Tom Batiuk whose work we are discussing. Of course he’s done that, many, many times. And he will no doubt continue to do it, many many times.

I thought DSH John sold the “dolly” a while ago. Perhaps Chester bought it back and donated it. For a rich guy, he sure likes throwing money away. I was pretty sure rich people did the opposite of this, but then I’ve been wrong about a great many things. And I’ve certainly never been nominated for a Pilitzer!

As for the strip itself, it’s actually rather sad. Funky was one of the very, very few characters who didn’t regard comic books as holy relics. I seem to recall when asked about them once, he claimed disinterest, saying something like “*I* grew up.”

How have the mediocre fallen.

That’s the Way the Cookie Crumbles

Link to today’s strip.

I can kind of see the joke, here. A fortune cookie without a fortune would be “un-fortunate.” It just seems oddly constructed, like he had the basic idea and struggled to fit it into a less clunky shape, finally saying “Oh, the heck with it” and just writing it in like it was on the napkin.

Maybe Funky’s line could have been something about “It was probably bad news anyway” or something. Or, the idea could have been dropped as unproductive.

But that would have meant coming up with another idea, which is work, so…”in” goes the cookie jest.

Bury My Foot at Wounded Knee

Link to today’s strip.

I have no idea what Holly means in panel two. Is she on her knees a lot? Does she scrub a lot of floors, or is her Dorf impression hugely popular at parties? When one says “I’m on my feet a lot” it tends to mean “I’m very busy.” I don’t know the corresponding meaning for knees.

Panel three is the real baffler. I really have no idea what she means. It’s framed as if it’s a punchline, but I cannot find a trace of humor in it–or anything sensible. Her knees want her to die so they can rest? Is that the joke?

Proof positive (as if any more were needed) that this is never touched by an editor.