Son of Stuck Funky

The Princess Snide

Uh no, Jessica. Unlike you, your mother shot footage that actually turned out to be useful to someone, even if it was only you. Unless she meant it as a self-deprecating remark about how much she (Jessica) sucks at film making, in which case bleh, tell us something we don’t know. Either way, chalk it up as just another failed TomBat “joke”, pure word balloon filler. I assumed he’d have them ponder and/or actually retrieve the videos for a day or two but nope, it’s wham-bam-thank you, man, for not dragging it out for another week and a half. Knock on wood.

But seriously, she knew exactly where she’d find the answer to the big “Barbie” last words mystery but she couldn’t figure it out before she actually saw the footage? And her reaction upon seeing this mystery-solving footage is to make a snide and/or self-deprecating remark about camera-handling skills? Either way it’s peculiar, from both a plot development and writing choice standpoint. I mean she can’t resist cracking wise and humble-bragging even as the moment she’s been waiting for plays out on the screen in front of her? So what is it that I’m supposed to “like” about this character, exactly?

Unbearable

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Thanks Jan Murdoch John Darling for reminding us that this isn’t one of those “gag-a-day” strips she’s normally associated with. No, this is Funky Winkerbean, the comic strip with a dark sense of loss, heartbreak and dread that hangs over absolutely everything all the time, every day. Note how Jessica, a true Westviewian, is actually amused by her mother’s ongoing pain, cracking a weary and knowing smirk because after living in Les Moore’s house for those few years, she gets it. As we all do.

When I titled my post last Saturday I never thought he’d actually feature a “dream house”. Color me mildly amused. Something appears to be taking shape here and if it holds true to form it’ll be every bit as lame as anyone imagined. Video tapes…the perfect way to keep those long dead characters alive after you’ve bumped them off for spite or easy attention. Watching Jessica trying to piece together a “mystery” that every single FW reader solved within a hundredth of a second is still sort of funny but increasingly less so with each passing panel.

And speaking of panels…a two paneler on a Tuesday? For shame, Tombat, for shame. Too little story for six full days again, eh? Always a bad sign when he’s resorting to padding this early in the week.

Rudeness IS Hereditary

jess

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Ah yes, the attic (they pronounce that as “bat-ick” in the mid-central Ohio valley, BTW)…where a Westviewian goes when they need to solve a mystery about or shed light upon a character who died many years ago. Of course John Darling didn’t expect to die so soon so his archives are probably a lot less thorough than Lisa’s were, but in any event it’s a safe bet that he left an explanation for his moronic last words in some sort of easily readable or watchable form.

Pretty classless how Jessica blithely shoves aside the widow John Darling (still in deep mourning if the black flowers are any indication) in her zeal to crack the mystery she’s been pondering for an hour or so now. Boy, is she easily distracted or what? I hope we get to see Boy Lisa’s reaction when Jessica reveals how she shot zero minutes of footage and spent the day fooling around in her parent’s attic while he slaved over a hot pizza app all day AND took care of that undeniably doomed baby while she was running around trying to solve rather obvious mysteries. He’ll probably be so angry he’ll barely able to break a smirk.

I could help but laugh at Batom’s helpful panel one recap, as if we needed a refresher after watching Funky take a three AM leak. We remember, Tom, even if you do not.

Thought Provoking AND Sensitive

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FUNKY WINKERBEAN IS A REALITY-BASED COMIC STRIP THAT DEPICTS CONTEMPORARY ISSUES AFFECTING YOUNG ADULTS IN A THOUGHT-PROVOKING AND SENSITIVE MANNER.

I guess TheAuthor needed a break after all that Plantman “action”. Thus a Sunday strip featuring Funky waking up in the middle of the night to urinate. That’s just swell.

FUNKY WINKERBEAN IS A REALITY-BASED COMIC STRIP THAT DEPICTS CONTEMPORARY ISSUES AFFECTING YOUNG ADULTS IN A THOUGHT-PROVOKING AND SENSITIVE MANNER.

These Sunday strips are all so drab and gloomy-looking, which fits the subject matter I suppose. He really outdid himself with capturing Funky’s all-around sad-sackishness though. He’s the world’s youngest elderly man, a fifty year old trapped inside a ninety year old body.

FUNKY WINKERBEAN IS A REALITY-BASED COMIC STRIP THAT DEPICTS CONTEMPORARY ISSUES AFFECTING YOUNG ADULTS IN A THOUGHT-PROVOKING AND SENSITIVE MANNER.

Sure it is, sure it is.

Barbie’s Scheme Louse

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“I love Barbie forever”…hmmmm, I wonder what THAT could possibly mean? We can rule out the possibility that JD was an avid Barbie collector, as everyone knows that Ohioians only collect comic books. There is no “Barbie” anywhere in FW lore as far as I know and the only character that even remotely resembles Barbie is…oh, I get it now. Pretty lame.

So will Jessica figure this out on her own or will someone have to explain it to her? I’m guessing the latter, as he’s going to have to drag this out for another week (at least) somehow. Plus it’d be very much in character considering that she’s a documentary film maker who left her equipment in a bag during the most compelling conversation she’s had with anyone in decades. He’ll likely have Boy Lisa or her mother John Darling’s wife Jan explain things to her while burying that “documentary” idea under so much sap and schmaltz it’ll never be heard from again. Then they will no doubt celebrate over some pizza while saying “John Darling” many times.

Still, all in all those are some pretty sorry last words. Pretty sorry “plot twist” too, but that’s to be expected. If he wanted to do a story about JD’s mysterious last words, why didn’t he just start with that instead of hacking away for two weeks establishing a premise he then just ignored? I mean last Saturday he did a whole silent strip featuring a nervous Jessica unloading equipment from her car, equipment she never even used. So why bother with the film premise at all? He could have just had Plantman send her a letter or something. It’s just so confounding and baffling (and stupid).