Rachel – Page 33 – Son of Stuck Funky

Hey KID!!

I gotta tread carefully here. I was born at a good time (on the same day Alaska became the 49th state, if you must know). I was too young for Nam-era military service, and was neither compelled or desirous to serve (unlike my late Dad and my two older brothers). So I can’t even suppose what it’s like to be a soldier, but I have the utmost respect and gratitude for everyone who has worn a uniform in our nation’s armed forces.

With that said: here we go again with Wally’s issues. Incredibly, that one visit with the shrink wasn’t enough to straighten him out. Wally’s having flashbacks because he “almost killed a kid”? All his flashbacks seem to involve engagement; does he have no trauma related to being held captive for years? None of this adds up for me, as in typical fashion, TB tries to spin drama from sketchy characters and their poorly imagined backstories.

So Far No Good

No sooner do they arrive at the County Fair then the flashbacks ensue (what, no photo-album corners?) Wally starts looking around for Charlie, or Ahmed or Osama or whatever enemy haunts his nightmares. Enjoy the rides and the games of chance, kids; but as Epicus Doomus pointed out yesterday: I strongly advise you to avoid the clown-head water balloon race.

Fair Shot

Rachel has apparently made it her mission to “cure” Wally’s anxieties by applying some tough love.

A friend of mine once commented, “With red hair, you’re either really good-looking…or really ugly.” Harsh, I know, but it was funny at the time. The thing is, Rachel manages to be both, at least the way Batiuk draws her. She’s actually one of the more attractively-drawn females in this strip. In today’s panel two, though, she looks like Ronald McDonald with no makeup.

Drive carefully, Wally. That looks like the same road where Uncle Cousin Funky totaled the Cruiser.

Date Night

We go from snowbirds to lovebirds…after a day of slacking in Montoni’s kitchen, Wally trades his olive drab tee shirt and schmatte for a dentist’s smock, and Rachel dons a puke-green maternity frock, and they wait until they are about to get in the car before making plans for the evening.

The Oily Boid

Rachel, having finally attracted the interest of a man, eschews her usual Sicilian slice for a healthy salad and a Coke Zero. “Hey, Boss. Where the hell has Tony been? The way you’ve been running his business into the ground, you’d think he’d be so far up your ass you could taste Brylcreem!”

It looks like TB has forgone his year-in-advance production schedule to bring us a story ripped from last month’s headlines. Get ready for A Very Special An Even Specialer Funky Winkerbean.