August 2013 – Page 6 – Son of Stuck Funky

Let’s Knot Go There

MKay
August 4, 2013 at 1:22 pm
Mop the floor at Montoni’s! It’s time for another society page gala!

merrypookster
August 4, 2013 at 11:55 pm
Better hurry and book Montoni’s

bobanero
August 5, 2013 at 8:35 am
Oh Boy!! Another Montoni’s wedding reception coming up…

“Funky’s going to want us to get married at Montoni’s, you know…” Thankfully, though, today Wally surprises us all, finally showing a little backbone and even some admirable restraint. Among the perfectly justifiable responses he could offer: “Who gives a fuck what Funky wants?” “Have our wedding in the pizzeria where we both work? Like I’m not humiliated enough by having to give you an I.O.U. instead of a ring…” Instead, our hero cooly dispenses some geeky t-shirt wisdom.

Man’s Best Man

The best man is the chief assistant to the groom at a wedding and (along with Maid of Honor) is the third most important in attendance after the Bride and Groom. In most modern, English-speaking countries, the groom extends this honor to someone who is close to him, generally his oldest and closest male friend, or a sibling.

At first, Wally’s selection of Buddy as best “man” seems like another one of Batiuk’s goofy, contrived plot flourishes. But actually, sadly, it makes sense. Since he appeared on his “widow” Becky’s doorstep four years ago, Wally’s been shunned by everyone he left behind when he went off to serve his country. Even his country didn’t bother to verify that the human remains they shipped home for burial were his. He was made to endure the most awkward homecoming ever before Becky handed him his trombone and showed him the door. His only known relative, ~~uncle~~ cousin Funky, has had little to do with him since giving him a job and surreptitiously swiping his sidearm.

Calling all guest authors! Putting out the call to see if any of y’all feel like filling in for a week, maybe 2, starting Monday. Drop me a line thru the usual channels. Prospective guest authors (who haven’t “guested” yet) are welcome to apply too…WordPress or blogging experience a plus. Use the Contact SoSF form in the right sidebar! Thanks. –TFH

Edit Profile

Maybe Wally’s “not very good at picking up cues,” but he is good at morphing his facial features. Check out his profile in panel three: gone are his hawk nose and sunken cheeks! He looks more like a movie star and less like Boomhower, for once. It must be love.

The Be-tr-owe-thal

“It’s an I.O.U. for an engagement ring.” Y’know, Wally, lots of guys decide to pop the question even if they don’t have the scratch for a diamond ring. But a written I.O.U.? Weak, dude. A two bit ring from a Crackerback jox would’ve been preferable to that. No doubt a Niagara Falls honeymoon is in store…fifty years from now.

Spit Tune

Having Wally as a member of the Westview Submarine Band gives Batiuk license to recycle all those band jokes from Acts I and II. While I enjoy a good band joke as much as the next euphonium player, the gag’s gotta make sense, and this one really doesn’t. The “spit valve” (properly called the “water key”–a trombone has no “valves” of any kind) is at the very end of the outer slide, and at no point in today’s strip do we see it anywhere in the vicinity of Buddy’s paw.