One Last Job After Retirement

Sorry, BeckoningChasm, you’re Snarking too well! Time to bring the snark down to the level of Tombat’s writing with a guest slot from SoSfDavidO here!

Link to today’s strip.

Harry, who has retired, is still attending the Ohio Music Education Association so he can walk around and deliver bad band puns and get lifetime achievement awards. I can’t blame him for staying active, though, because he looks younger than Funky does these days despite being at least 15 years his elder.


Filed under Son of Stuck Funky

15 responses to “One Last Job After Retirement

  1. JerrytheMacGuy

    Oh great, I have to Dinkle.

  2. Epicus Doomus

    Oh no, the dreaded band director convention arc, complete with ancient old Dinkle tropes that were played out twenty-five years ago…great. Be prepared for a week’s worth of “it’s hard out there for a band director” gags and a hell of a lot of cackling, hatchet-faced smirks. Dinkle’s irritating schtick is annoying enough as it is but when Harriet is there doing her bloated Gracie Allen bit along with him, he’s even more insufferable.

    But I guess he has to do these stupid Dinkle arcs to appease the six or seven band directors out there who find these band-related strips amusing enough to cut out and tape to the side of the filing cabinets in their offices, as they do represent a solid two-thirds of his readership. I’m assuming that attending conventions and gloating about yourself is just one of those nasty chores that makes band directing such a thankless and unforgiving grind of a profession.

  3. Wow, I didn’t think it was possible but someone in this strip is out-smuggling Les.

  4. Rusty

    Harry has an extra bag filled with his performance enhancers, in case his wife is told to put out. I’m still ill thinking of that arc. And it isn’t a band director convention without the one-armed wonder. Maybe she will bring John and explain to him how hotel room door locks work.

  5. Harry Dinkle is like Les–it’s clear that Batiuk has an enormous amount of affection for the character. Also like Les, the character simply begs for a punch in the face. (Well, of course all the characters do, but some more than others.)

  6. Gyre

    Normally I would say that it’s just bad story telling, not that the characters themselves are actually bad. But no, things like this actually have them as self-absorbed, egotistical assholes. And the problem with the humor is that I’m fairly sure we’re not supposed to think that.

    I mean, sure the setup for this strip nods at how ridiculous it is for anyone to actually have that as a name for a reservation, but I don’t think we’re intended to see it as this man having no end to the depths of his narcissism. If we were than I’m pretty sure we’d see a lot of strips of people angry with him or not wanting to help him.

  7. Smirks 'R Us

    panel 4:
    clerk: “As requested, we have the cheap champagne and industrial size tube of Astroglide waiting in your room”

    The Dinkles: *smirk knowingly at each other*

    The other people within earshot: *projectile vomit*

  8. billytheskink

    Only Dinkle would expect the on-site registration desk to have his pre-registered credentials. Tomorrow he will likely be holding up the registration line telling the registrar how he was the first fictional character to march in the Tournament of Roses parade.


    I’m going to stop reading this strip for a while, I’m terrified that I might lapse into a coma from all the excitement. Though I probably wouldn’t miss anything plot-wise during my time in a coma.

  10. Professor Fate

    Isn’t he deaf? He seems to hear everything okay these days but if memory serves the reason he retired was he couldin’t hear anymore. Has that gone away – if so it’s a rare example of FW not squeezing the last drop of blood from the misery turnip.

  11. Chaos Clockwork

    I’ve arbitrarily decided something. You know what I’ve arbitrarily decided? I’ve arbitrarily decided that I would like Becky a thousand times better if she was wearing the band director hat every time we saw her, like Dinkle back in the old days. I don’t think I’ve *ever* seen her in anything even vaguely like Dinkle’s old uniform.

  12. Charles

    The only interest I have in this story, literally the only interest I have is seeing just how much Batiuk will mail it in. It’s no doubt going to be almost exactly like the last four times he ran this story, but I’m wondering exactly how close.

    And was the last one really a year ago? It seems as if it was last month. Textbook definition of “a little of him goes a long way.”

  13. Meanwhile at the Comic-Con registration desk:

    What do you mean, there’s no registration for Tom Batiuk?

    Oh, here it is, under “Lamest Comic strip writer in the world”

  14. Cory–and probably Kahn/Khan now–is in Afghanistan, Summer is having trouble in college. We seen little from Keisha in a while, We haven’t heard from Crazy Harry in a while. I’ve seen one or two panels of Maddie since graduation, and one panel of Jinx. Wally is getting married. We haven’t heard from Susan in almost three years. Batiuk has all of these story engines, but he still writes the most pointless tripe possible.

  15. John

    Woman: “I’m sorry, we have nothing here for ‘Funky Winkerbean’.”

    Dinkle: “But it’s a comic strip that’s lasted over forty years! Culturally significant -and- relevant to the youth of today, in a sensitive and meaningful manner!”

    Woman: “I see. And you are the star, Funky Winkerbean?”

    Dinkle: “No, the star is Les Moore, the Wise Author of Westview!”

    Woman: “You’re Les Moore?”

    Dinkle: “No, I’m Harry Dinkle. I used to be the band director of the local high school, but after my Tragic Hearing Loss, I had to quit!”

    Woman: “….the band directing job?”

    Dinkle: “No, the hearing loss! It just went away one day! Almost as if the wielder of the giant SharpieTM controlling my life forgot all about it! HAW! So now I mostly barge into the private office of the current band director to shoot the breeze! And would you believe the school still foots the bill for me attending these conventions? HAW! By the way, precipitation is SOMETHING THAT EXISTS!”

    Woman: “….*….um, yes, yes it does.”

    Dinkle: “HAW!”

    (The woman begins backing away slowly. Dinkly continues guffawing. Harriet stares off into space.)