by | August 2, 2014 · 12:10 am

Les Action

SoSFDavidO here for the next two weeks, takin’ the reins! It’s back to Mason’s sports car in today’s strip as Mason points out that making an action movie is apparently so easy that anyone with a video toaster can make one. Les’s “Chick Flick” is much, much higher art of course, somehow, even though the intent of every movie is to make a hell of a lot of money no matter what demographic they’re targeting. With bam-bam-CGI action movie Guardians of the Galaxy set to make 90 million dollars this week, why argue with success?

15 Comments

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15 responses to “Les Action”

  1. Epicus Doomus
    August 2, 2014 at 12:16 am

    Look at all those Batiukmobiles! You don’t see a lot of traffic like that in Westview. From mawkish sentimentality right into senseless and self-serving wankery without missing a beat. Let’s face it, the man has a gift. Isn’t it AMAZING how he managed to get that “SJ” reference in there so smoothly and seamlessly? It fits so neatly into the plot, which isn’t difficult considering there isn’t one, but still.

    But all things considered, at least he gave Mason something resembling a personality today, unlike the rest of the week where his dialog might as well have been “duh?” over and over again. Turns out he’s a fledgling action hero and not really a “chick flick” kind of guy, which is why he was the perfect choice to star in Batom’s weird “Lisa’s Story” fantasy…er, the movie in the strip and the thing, I mean. Seriously, this story is kind of difficult to follow what with the way it doesn’t exist and all. Idiots jabbering about nothing, day after day after day. He gave up “gag-a-day” for this?

  2. Rusty
    August 2, 2014 at 12:18 am

    If this guy landed the lead in the Starbuck Jones movie, he would be on the Westview Mount Rushmore.

  3. $$$WESTVIEW ONCOLOGIST$$$
    August 2, 2014 at 12:29 am

    Wow. Does Tom Batiuk really not know the difference between a “chick flick” and a “softcore porn” title? I know Batiuk is completely oblivious to the world around him, but i think some lady would have dragged him to see a rom-com at some point. Admittedly that may be the case. I can’t imagine Tom Batiuk is a great movie companion.

  4. spacemanspiff85
    August 2, 2014 at 1:13 am

    I still think Mason being up for SJ is Batiuk’s subtle attempt to make Les seem awesome. Like, you read it and think “Wow, this guy was up for the part of the greatest action hero the world has ever known, and he’s now playing Les Moore? This Les guy must be a real badass then”.

  5. Paul Jones
    August 2, 2014 at 3:25 am

    Eeeeccchhhh. We end the week on a sour note as Mason smugly talks about how great it is that acting has gone the way of the dodo. Time for your dirt-nap, Tommy Boy…..

  6. Charles
    August 2, 2014 at 5:44 am

    So Mason is an actor of so little renown he’s better known for the roles he got turned down for than he is for any of the roles he actually played.

    That said, what a terrible strip to end the week on. Had nothing to do with the past week’s strips, and no doubt will have nothing to do with next week’s, either.

  7. merrypookster
    August 2, 2014 at 7:44 am

    Teachers start TB’s Medina High School on August 15th. But Less doesn’t need lesson plans, students just bask in his glow.
    Meanwhile his real-life wife (Cayla) isn’t dead yet….so he doesn’t care.
    Maybe if the KSU ladies BB was a 1/4″ from being decent there’d be a continued story-line of Summer entering her Junior Year of college..
    I think Cory extended his Afganistan&olie tour just to stay away from Westview.

  8. gleeb
    August 2, 2014 at 9:16 am

    Man, you shouldn’t oughta do that to a guy. I thought the Imaginary Depression Cat was gonna be in this.

  9. bigd1992
    August 2, 2014 at 10:35 am

    The douche is strong in these two

  10. bobanero
    August 2, 2014 at 11:01 am

    Yes, everybody in Hollywood is shallow and evil, and we flew you out here, put you up in a fine hotel, and bought you lunch just so we could rub it in.

  11. Howard and Nester
    August 2, 2014 at 12:19 pm

    I don’t begrudge Mason Jarr his preference for action flicks. Nothing wrong with being a workhorse actor who’s more concerned about keeping their schedule full with whatever comes along that producing ~THE ART~! Jack Lemmon (RIP), Kevin Spacey, and Michael Caine are some of my favorite actors — though as you might have noticed with Caine there’s such a thing as being TOO undiscerning with your projects. 😉

    However, Batiuk thinking or implying that action flicks require less of a time investment on the actor’s part than more stately ones is just silly. Just the thought of putting your patience and body through 10 hours of rolling on the ground repeatedly or holding up a heavy rifle or being hunched over a motorcycle fills me with existential despair. I admire those who do that for a living.

  12. The Dreamer
    August 2, 2014 at 6:30 pm

    They are going to call the movie, “Lust for Lisa”? They haven’t see pics of Lisa in high school obviously. Lisa is probably being played by an actress with long blond hair and 38DDD’s No wonder she gets to live in the end, who would want to see a woman that hot die?

  13. oddnoc
    August 2, 2014 at 8:28 pm

    If you write it down, and it’s as true as possible, and they make a film, that’s not art.

    That’s a documentary.

  14. beckoningchasm
    August 2, 2014 at 10:56 pm

    Amazing how the universe of Funky Winkerbean keeps shrinking. Of course Starbuck Jones is somehow linked to “Les’ Story.”

  15. Erich
    August 3, 2014 at 1:47 am

    Just to show what a TALENTED storyteller could do with the premise of a screenwriter’s “vision” being tampered with by TV producers who don’t care that it’s based on a true story:
    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Speaking_Parts