SoSFDavidO here for the next two weeks, takin’ the reins!
Looking back at Lisa’s Story, the other shoe, (inspiration for the script they’re yammering about in today’s strip,) it’s hard to imagine how much he could do to add or remove from the strip. Almost every part of the movie is going to take place at Int: Montoni’s Pizza or Int: Lisa’s bathroom. Sure, there’s a few trips to the hospital and that weird football catch at the beginning but other than that, Lisa’s Story would be better told as a novel or a… (reluctant sigh) daily comic strip.
Son of Stuck Funky 
This is the first time we’re seeing Beardo doing any actual work and we’re like what, five weeks into this thing already? And of course, despite his laughably light workload, he’s all whiny about it like always. Batom is at his most unintentionally hilarious when he does these “the woe of a writer” stories. It’s so amusing on so many levels. Too bad Les is involved though, because any mild enjoyment I get out of it is instantly ruined by the presence of his annoying stupid face. F*ck that guy. I won’t be eating any beef for a few days, I can tell you that much.
How could Mason be studying a script that isn’t finished yet? I mean seriously, “beef down”? “Lisa’s Story”? I don’t think that’s possible. Sometimes FW reads like the guy writing it just totally lost track of the story along the way before finding his bearings again, albeit barely. Ok, Ok, scratch the “sometimes”.
What really annoys me is that yet again, we’re being asked to whine about Les’s blinkered vision being diluted to appeal to the needs of the deluded idiots who can’t face the reality of the futility and emptiness of it all. Since he could never find pleasure in anything, neither can we.
This “Lust for Lisa” has got to be the cheapest movie of all time. Why in the name of all that’s groovy do they have Les rewriting the script over and over again? The movie biz has competent people available at the drop of a hat that could do the job quicker and with less fuss. Les has absolutely zero experience and is tasked with beating the script into submission, but apparently he works for Tandoori Chicken and board. This outfit makes Funky Finger Productions look like MGM. Watch. When this is masterpiece is finally broadcast, it will fail miserably and be widely panned. Les will whine and bitch and moan about how shitty Hollywood is and everyone at Montoni’s plus that schmuck over on the Comics Kingdom comments will commiserate. The Westview Misery Index will be peaking. While we wait, I wonder who Cayla ran off with.
The real problem is that by letting a non-union writer touch this messterpiece, the studio risks having the Writer’s Guild busting in their doors with a battering ram and wheeling in the guillotine. Then again, Batiuk doesn’t know much about the real world so……
@Paul Jones: Alternatively, the WG might be trying to teach Hollywood a lesson. One surefire way to force management to come to the table would be to let the floor boss hire Gilligan, Gomer Pyle, and Homer Simpson as scabs. And so it is with Les Moore, this generation’s Ed Wood — had Ed Wood been a querulous simpleton.
Guess that bearded dick is good for something after all.
Hiring Les to rewrite his own script is like hiring Crankshaft to put out a forest fire.
Oh, dear god in heaven this is boring!! i know we have had some terrible plotlines and stories in the past, but for some reason this one is just mind-numbingly inane!!!
I seriously think watching a glass of water evaporate would be more interesting than this. Would probably happen quicker, too.
This is like one of those trick birthday cake candles that won’t go out when you blow on it, except that instead of trying to extinguish a candle you are trying to find the humor in the punchline.
For those of you not yet reading “The Comics Curmudgeon” (what is wrong with you!), I repost this comment by, Droopy Says:
“Funky Stinkerbean: Cutting the beef from Les’s script is like castrating a eunuch: there’s nothing there anyway.”
The bizarre “funkyfan” persona over on CK outed him– or herself as a troll and Democrat today.
Make of that what you will, but it’s more interesting than the plot.
“we need to cut the scene where Lisa’s long lost son opens the envelope and finds out Lisa is his mother – when we were doing a read through 3 cast members passed out from boredom
Once again, Tom Batiuk should really stick to what he knows (whatever that might be). They wouldn’t be rehearing unless the script was in a format very close to final; they certainly wouldn’t be re-writing major scenes unless characters were dropped or added.
Now, for episodic television or the stage, some major re-writing might be done, especially in the latter case depending on audience reaction if the play has already opened. For a cable TV movie? No, it doesn’t work this way. At most Les would be adding sighs and smirks to dialogue that’s pretty well long decided on.
See Beckoning, the scam theory sounds a lot stronger every day. The real reason why they keep giving parts of the script that need revising to Les? To deliberately increase costs they’re keeping him around, but they know that if he finds out he’ll walk off, so they’re giving him busywork to keep him out of the way.
I’ll bet that Mason is currently spending his time at a Hollywood coke party with two blondes and it’s going to be invoiced as “time on set”.
@Gyre – an interesting theory. However, the use of the word “interesting” means it will never happen in this strip. Interesting is to Funky Winkerbean as garlic is to vampires.
Note: Taking a common phrase and then changing it to its opposite does not, in and of itself, constitute “wordplay.”