Apocalypse, Huh?

Link To Today’s Atrocity.

Whew! For a second there I thought she said “chemotherapy” and I was all like, “oh noes, not again!”. But nope, no cancer today, just a racially-insensitive and weirdly out-of-context remark from Cayla as DickFace tries desperately to think. And suddenly the “where will the reunion be?” odds shift somewhat, as Les’ house makes a bold narrative move on the outside. And by “bold” of course I mean “cripplingly stupid”.

Just look at him today…gak. He’s all worked up after totally botching his reunion organizing duties (mostly due to his incessant whining and simpering) while Cayla (correctly) browbeats him. Having that “in memoriam” board in her house might finally push her over the edge, or at least we can hope. I just can’t see how they could possibly fit that massive thundering herd into Moore Manor, I mean have you seen the size of those people? Mary Sue alone will just ruin those floor joists.

“Worse would have to come to the end of the world…”, is it just me or is that one of the clumsiest sentences ever? You’ve heard of syntax? Well, FW is syntaxing to read. And look at. And think about. And isn’t it funny how everyone in Westview speaks in cultural references from the 1950’s? I somehow doubt that young Cayla Williams spent her weekends watching “The Lone Ranger” and old westerns down at the local movie house, seeing how she was born in the late 1960s or early 1970s and all. Someone send him a link to Urban Dictionary or something.

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15 Comments

Filed under Son of Stuck Funky

15 responses to “Apocalypse, Huh?

  1. Coco

    When Les was on his book signing tour, a woman with cancer referred to her supportive husband (might have shaved his head) as her chemo-sabe.

  2. billytheskink

    Is it possible that Cayla is a functionally delusional Lone Ranger super fan who genuinely believes she’s married to Clayton “Les” Moore?
    I mean, that’s more believable than love and such, isn’t it?

  3. SpacemanSpiff85

    “But…but…what if I wrote a graphic novel about how you let me hold the reunion at our house? You’d have to let me do it then, wouldn’t you?”

  4. Every so often, Cayla decides she’s not putting up with Les’ crap and I almost have hope for her. Then she goes back to letting the Specialest Snowflake wipe his boots on her, and that hope quietly dies.

  5. All this so that we might spend a whole week coming to the foregone conclusion of Les taking credit for Cayla’s suggestion of holding it at a seedy pizza parlor. We have to build phony suspense while the imbecile dithers and stalls for time so that Batiuk can think that he’s got people fooled.

  6. Rusty Shackleford

    Yea, terrible writing. He could have used the fact that Cayla is black to throw in some sitcom dialog and have her say something like “aww, helllllllllllll no!”

  7. $$$WESTVIEW ONCOLOGIST$$$

    Um…how big could this reunion be if it is capable of being held in Casa Moore?

  8. nedryerson

    This is indeed a tortured turn of phrase.

  9. This one I liked. I actually don’t have an issue with Cayla using the term “kemosabe,” but I really would have loved it if she called Les,”Tonto” instead. There have been 6 Lone Range feature films since 1956 and 3 of them have been made in Cayla’s “lifetime” (1983, 2003 & 2013). What I don’t like about today’s strip, is that it sets up Cayla to be the one to suggest the Pizza Parlor Reunion after Les’ sad puppy dog face.

  10. bigd1992

    Have it at the closed post office

  11. Epicus Doomus

    I’m still going with Montoni’s. And I’m also guessing that it will quickly devolve into lots of sepia-toned corner-thingies retcon flashbacks, which will inevitably end with Les fondly reminiscing about the time Lisa went into labor while eating pizza after school, because if Tombat doesn’t re-live that “golden oldie” every few years his brain gets all backed-up.

    “Kemosabe” just sounds to me like something BanTom might say, not Cayla. Then again, she’s never really been permitted to have an actual personality of her own aside from her usual “good-natured doormat” act.

  12. bigd1992

    Cayla should’ve told him “bye Felicia!”

  13. John

    Les: “I suppose if worse comes to worse, we could be the creation of a burnt out, bitter and creatively bankrupt old cartoonist, desperately pulling plot points from lame 80s sitcoms for ideas.”

    Cayla: “Wachoo talkin’ about, Les?”

    Les: “Oh, are you here, Cayla? I was just talking to myself.”

    Cayla: “Worse would have to come to the end of the world for that to happe-….What the HELL does that mean?!?”

    Les: “….I’m….uh….”

    Cayla: “WHO’S EDITING THIS GARBAGE? Are you high? Snap out of it!”

  14. Nathan Obral

    Actually, I thought that the “kemosabe” line was funny. Just not in the way Batom® thought it was funny.

    To wit, one of my favorite “Far Side” panels:

  15. batgirl

    It’s as if he couldn’t quite remember this joke – or didn’t have the guts to go through with it:
    Lone Ranger: “Tonto, we’re surrounded by hostile Indians. Looks like we’re in deep trouble.”
    Tonto: “What do you mean _we_, white man?”