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Son of Stuck Funky · The web's premiere source for Funky Winkerbean snark
Son of Stuck Funky 
And neither am I.
You’d think as much as Owen’s been bullied, you’d think he’d know you have to do more than just sneer and tell someone what year you are. Although if he considers that bullying, it explains why he hates school so much.
Well, considering how the last few “bullying” arcs have involved Metamucil and Les wetting himself, this could certainly be worse. He surely has something more than “Owen is too goofy to be a bully” in mind here though, right? RIGHT??? Sigh.
I don’t get the red poster beneath the comic strip. Is there really a bullying story coming soon or is that an attempt at ‘edgy’ humor? Anyway, the strip itself is pretty good — who hasn’t been caught up in a role they feel obligated to play? Whether it’s a senior who thinks he’s supposed to be feared by freshmen or a blogger who believes a ten year campaign against a comic strip is the way to internet fame, we all sometimes play the fool.
“Bernie Silver?” That has to be a joke name somehow… or was there some poor dupe at Midview High School or Brunswick High School who lent his name and likeness to the “Trouble with Tracy” of syndicated newspaper comics?
You know, if I saw an impish kid come at me wearing a soul patch, a chullo and the Fourth Doctor’s scarf… I would probably die. From laughter.
@Nathan–i think first choice was “Herschel Goldstein” but something told him that was a little too much.
So class, can anyone tell me why Owen would suddenly feel a need to try to bully younger students after years of being an average guy who doesn’t really like school, is picked on and just tries to get by in the world? Or why his best friend, a guy who’s basically the same as Owen, would just let this happen in front of him? If you can, please write to Mr. Tom Batiuk, writer of Funky Winkerbean. Because I’m sure he’s going to have a lot of trouble finding a good reason and could use some outside help.
Just please, please tell me that Bernie isn’t going to become Les 3.0….
Uno, dos, one two tres quatro
Owen told Bernie, with a crooked maw
Wore a stupid hat and had a wooly jaw
Wooly Bul… OK, that’s enough. This isn’t interesting enough to complete a shoddy song parody.
So the great anti-bullying story arc is just going to be about Owen and maybe Cody trying on the bully hat for a week before realizing they are neither physically nor mentally intimidating enough to wear it? For TB “living up to the hype” means NEVER living up to the hype.
Golly gee willikers! I get the red poster beneath the comic strip. That’s super neato! A real bullying story that is an attempt at ‘edgy’ humor! Anyway, the strip itself is just darling — who hasn’t been caught up in a role they feel obligated to play? No one? Oh, ok. A senior who thinks he’s supposed to be feared by freshmen is the way to internet fame – well – he’ll sometimes play the fool.
@thedefender: The reason we’re mocking this arc is because the premise and conclusion are absurd. We start with Owen thinking that now it’s his turn to act like a jerk to freshmen “because that’s what seniors do”, we see him get rebuffed because no one can take someone who looks as menacing as a spool of thread seriously and will no doubt end with his stating that he should be better than his oppressors because admitting that no one finds him to be a viable threat is too painful.
This may have been more effective if Battic had actually aged Chullo and Glasses into looking like 17 year olds, instead of keeping them looking like meandering freshmen.
Roger Ebert once wrote that watching a certain movie was like “taking a bus trip with somebody who has needed a bath for a long time.” Whenever I see Owen in that unremovable, 24/7, no-doubt-horrifically-smelling chullo, I think of that quote.
Surely it would be more in character for Owen, the “dumb as rocks, but nice” guy of the strip who we’ve known for….more than four years would act nicer to the freshmen and reassure them? But what do I know about anything, I’M NOT A WRITER!!!!
@ComicTrek: Don’t worry, Batiuk isn’t really much of a writer, either.
So that’s the freshman up in the header all week? I thought it was Fred’s bastard daughter.
@billytheskink – “Wooly Bully” would have been a perfect title for today’s SoSF entry, you have to admit.
I have to admit that I actually liked today’s strip. It kind of showed the human side of Chullo-head – trying to be a menacing senior, but being instantly disarmed by a freshman who could tell right away that he was full of shit.
My guess is that today’s strip is just a set up joke that is a prelude to the “real” bullying arc that is coming. If TB follows his usual pattern, we’ll have a few more days of throw-away strips before we get into any meaningful action, if we ever do.
Well maybe if you guys actually worked out or did some weights, you might be a bit more physically imposing. I mean seriously, you guys have the exact same physique you had as sophmores. Heck, Ken Jeong there looks like he could kick the crap out of both of you with one arm tied behind his back.
Just goes to show how many time TB must have been hung by his BVD’s off mailboxes. I bet if he ever leaves his attic these days it still happens.
Dear defender – what on earth made you think that this blogsite is an attempt to win internet fame? I mean one can disagree about the quality of the strip but to impune the motives of the folks running this is a low blow.
As per the strip well so this is the long trumpeted Bullying Arc. And sense it makes not a lick of emotional sense. In the first place a guy with that hat, a Doctor Who scarf, a soul Patch who hangs around the comic book store all day is going to have his lunch money taken from him by second graders. Bully he ain’t
And the Author, who claims that he spends time in High Schools seems to have forgotten the whole nature of high school and their cliques – within the classes there are hierarchies – Jocks/popular kids on top – guys like Owen on the bottom. Even in his senior year he’d be bullied by other seniors.
Now if the Author wanted to show the corrosive effects of bullying on Owen with the result that Owen starts to kick down to relive the stress he feels by being bullied well then you’d have’ an interesting story and plausible motive for his attempt to terrorize a freshman. But this is FW and consistent character counts for naught so Owen wants to bully because Owen wants to bully.
I a modern ‘Anti-Bullying’ storyline, so I’m laying 50 bucks on the kids from the Castle of Gayness Prom coming back. Pulitzer or GLAAD award. It’s all the same to BaTom
If “internet fame” was the goal here, we’d probably pick a more popular comic strip.
—If “internet fame” was the goal here, we’d probably pick a more popular comic strip.—
Heck, this site has probably gained Tom Batiuk more readers than he normally would have.
Few people knew who Coleman Francis was until MST3K.
This site is the only reason I read FW.