Mild-mannered principal Nate springs out of character in today’s strip and demands that Lefty remove “Faith Of Our Fathers” from the Holiday Concert program.

Yeah, yeah, seen it before. Public school has to alter Christmas performance, removing an explicitly Christian song or statement in order to maintain an apparent separation of church and sta- WHOA! Nate has an entirely different reason for wanting “Faith Of Our Fathers” removed from the program? Oh ho ho, Tom, you got me. You got me good. I was totally thinking the one thing and then, BAM! Never saw this “mothers” thing coming.

It’s a classic bait-and-switch, like when the table of contents of my newspaper says the comics are on page E6, and I turn to E6 and find Funky Winkerbean.

“Faith Of Our Fathers”, by the way, is a hymn written about/in memory of English Catholic martyrs of the Reformation period. When TB picks a theme, by gum, he sticks with it.



Filed under Son of Stuck Funky

21 responses to “Discr-hymn-ination

  1. Rusty Shackleford

    Aha ha ha ha, aw Batty you crack me up. Pure gold.

  2. Rusty

    The border of the last panel almost forms a phantom arm below the pinned up sleeve. And that was the most interesting thing I could think of about this strip. I guess we have at least 4 more days of this hilarity.

  3. Gerard Plourde

    Of course it completely begs the question why Lefty would pick a hymn completely unrelated to Christmas in the first place. Oh right, “It’s called writing”, whatever that means.

  4. Epicus Doomus

    First off, the pinned-up sleeve. Why so gratuitous, Tom? Don’t worry, we still remember how BECKY LOST HER ARM IN A DRUNK DRIVING ACCIDENT, it hasn’t been forgotten or anything. Is he ever going to allow Becky to change things up and develop her own look or is it the ol’ tri-foldo forevermore? I’ll never stop hating it.

    And once again we see Becky failing. Is anyone in Westview as bad at their job as she is? Even the pathetic Bull finally won a championship. Dinkle loved the job so much he never left after he retired, but for Lefty it’s been nothing but a bone-wearying slog. She can’t even throw together a reasonable Christmas concert for crying out loud. Just pathetic. She might just be one of the two or three saddest-sack characters in the strip.

  5. billytheskink

    I guess this means “What Child Is This?” off the program too, as it is set to the tune of “Greensleeves”. The school surely doesn’t want to offend Lefty.

  6. Merry Pookster

    @ Billy…in Westview that’d be “Greensleeve” singular in Becky’s case

  7. merrypookster

    Tom…. did you even look up the words to Faith of our Fathers?
    Nothing related in any way/shape/form to anything festivas.
    Whatta maroon.

  8. Oh ho ho, that political correctness running mad! Good to see Tom Batiuk is on top of the major talking points of twenty years ago!

    I’m guessing Becky read the lyrics talking about suffering and death and considered it the holly-jolliest thing she’d ever encounter in Westview.

  9. Mr. B.Lumpkin

    I cannot stand political correctness bullshit in any media, in any way, shape or form. To bring it up in a comic strip – well, actually two; “Curtis” is talking about it, too, this week – makes me sick to my stomach. Enough is enough.

  10. Monotony

    @Gerard Plourde: In Westview, martyrdom is always topical.

  11. Jimmy

    Just counter it with Silent Night. The first verse is very mother friendly.

  12. Well, I hate to say it but he IS handling the subject in the stupidest way possible. About all this is good for is revealing that Yooperman is a God-damn Nazi or something. Man. When did Merry Christmas turn into a way to say “Fuck you”?

  13. A HREF

    For some inexplicable reason “Faith of Our Fathers” is included on Bing Crosby’s Xmas album. So TB thinks it is Xmas song.

  14. Has Batiuk ever portrayed any church in Westview… ever? Or do they all congregate at Montoni’s every Sunday morning to eat breakfast pizza and watch Dead St. Lisa tapes?

  15. Hannibal's Lectern

    Patience, people… we could be witnessing a major step in Batty’s growth as a cartoonist. This thing we have here takes the form of an actual joke, with setup and (mildly) surprising punchline, something we have not seen before in the endless river of misery and smirking bad puns that is the Funkyverse. True, it still lacks many attributes of an acutal joke, like a knowledge of the material (“Faith of Our Fathers” is, as many of you have noted, not remotely a Christmas song), and a subject (the supposed “war on Christmas”) that hasn’t been beaten to death (though in all fairness, Walker-Browne Amalgamated Humor LLC has managed to build quite an empire around jokes that have been beaten to death). But the form is there, making me thing Batty’s either been introduced to the notion by what might be the last editor in newspaper comics who still gives a rat’s patootie about the medium, or somehow observed jokes in other strips and decided to take the plunge and try writing one himself. Either way, he should be encouraged.

  16. As you’ve all noted, “Faith of Our Fathers” is pretty explicitly Christian–odd choice for a high school “holiday program,” and it has nothing to do with Christmas–odd choice for a high school “holiday program.”

    But never mind that. Let’s see what else we can envision ahead–

    “I saw Three Ships” – offensive to the blind.
    “What Child is This” – trigger to the adopted
    “White Christmas” – offensive to other races
    “Rudolph, the Red-Nosed Reindeer” – trigger to alcoholics
    “Frosty the Snowman” – possible drug reference
    “Jingle Bell Rock” – possible drug reference
    “Little Drummer Boy” – Possible drug reference

    Hey, this is kind of fun! No wonder it engaged Tom Batiuk’s interest. If I didn’t have to go to work–if I was a cartoonist, for example–I could do this all day!

  17. billytheskink

    You forgot “Do You Hear What I Hear?” BC. Offensive to Harry Dinkle during those couple months back in 2007-2008 when he was going deaf.

  18. Jason

    yay! Straw man political correctness! Even the most latte sippin’, granola munchin’ Berkeley resident wouldn’t make a statement as dumb as this one.


    Oh, dear god it’s worse than I thought…Batiuk is going to talk about modern feminism.

  20. Howtheduck

    Isn’t this a band concert? How would the lyrics of any piece they play be offensive unless they plan to sing it too? My daughter’s band director completely side-steps this kind of stuff by issuing no programs and introducing the pieces by composer name.