What’s in Your Wallet?

The year’s still young, but apart from Crazy Harry’s Casablanca outing, Cliff Anger’s marriage proposal to Vera, and Dinkle and Becky’s convention trip, Funky Winkerbean‘s been all about…Funky Winkerbean. The Funkman  and/or wife Holly (whose hair color recently changed from blonde to the same gray/beige “greige” as Bull Bushka’s temples)  have figured in 60% of the strips since January 1st. By comparison, Les has only been seen four times and been given exactly one line of dialogue! Be thankful for small favors. In any event, the titular character, love him or hate him, is getting lots of screentime.

We regularly take Batty to task for depicting milieux (mainly the comics and motion picture industries) that reflect his interests but in which he has only vague understanding. Query which is better or worse: TB’s hamfisted Hollywood fantasies, or relateable, mundane, QIRFRL* arcs like “Funky Renews His Driver’s License“?

*Quarter-inch removed from real life



Filed under Son of Stuck Funky

17 responses to “What’s in Your Wallet?

  1. Next week! Funky decides to get his oil changed, but discovers that the coupon he was going to use…has expired! And Tom Batiuk could draw a Grim Reaper with his scythe poised over a whole fistful of coupons! And the Grim Reaper would smirk say “I’m always clipping your coupons!”
    I’m telling you, it will be epic!

  2. Epicus Doomus

    I’m very interested in seeing exactly how mundane Batiuk is capable of getting. “Funky gets an oil change”…”Funky mows the lawn”…”Funky goes outside to get the mail”…”Funky gets a slice of bread stuck in the toaster” and so forth. I figure that in a year or two the strip will consist of Funky standing outside saying “hmmm, looks like rain later today” over and over again. And few if any will notice.

    We know he does the strips a year ahead of time, but I wonder if he keeps a sticky note with last year’s unresolved arcs nearby so he doesn’t forget them. Like for example, is Frankie still running his Film Food truck scam at the SJ production? When he finally returns to that story will it pick up right where it left off or will it be several months later like in real life? Is this Funky and Holly stuff something he’s had on the back-burner for a while or did this crap just suddenly come to him? It’s sort of riveting in a bizarre, boring way, I find the way he chooses to work to be just fascinating.

  3. count of tower grove

    @Epicus Doomus, Batiuk wouldn’t use post-its, more likely bits of scrap paper clumsily taped to the wall.

  4. spacemanspiff85

    So how exactly did Funky fly twice with an expired license?

  5. spacemanspiff85

    @Epicus Doomus: I would take any one of those stories over ones involving Starbuck Jones and/or comic books IN A HEARTBEAT.

  6. Since they probably would have warned him that his license was about to expire, this is the end result of his casually chucking things in the round file without bothering to read them first. This makes pants-on-head stupidity the topping on Batiuk’s pizza of petty revenge against cogs in bureaucratic machinery.

  7. @BC: the Grim Reaper panel will no doubt be a Sideways Sunday, drawn by a competent comic-book artist. I’m sure T-Bats can find five more things that expire to fill out the week: oil change coupon, the loan on his library book, the 2-for-1 Montoni’s offer that he ran in The Paper without updating the expiration date, the grace period on his credit card bill, the “enjoy by” date on those pork chops in the fridge… With any luck, that last one will leave him with a painful and nearly fatal case of food poisoning.

  8. billytheskink

    Good to see that Crazy shirks his job at Komix Korner just like he shirked his job with the Post Office.

  9. Hitorque

    So… I guess tomorrow Funky learns that his vehicle inspection and registration have to be updated regularly as well? Along with his health/cleanliness inspection at Montoni’s? And for the love of Christ I hope nobody tells him that taxes are a yearly thing…

  10. On the official FW blog, Batiuk teases “sort of a comic strip-time-traveling crossover” later this year involving Phil the Forecaster from the John Darling strip.

  11. Comic Book Harriet

    True story. I was 26 and got a hefty ticket before I knew that the vehicle registration needed to renewed yearly. I can’t help but feel that the school system/my parents failed me by telling me useless information like the Pythagorean Theorem, but not this important slice of life info.

    I predict Funky will have to retake the driver’s test, administered by some heavy-lidded, never smiling, millennial.

    Funky has been more Crankshaft lately than Crankshaft. Crankshaft has been living an enviable life; contemplating buying a flamethrower, binge watching television, and lovingly rubbing his balls in public.

  12. Max Power

    I may have missed it, but did the Official FW Blog tease the “Funky’s Drivers License Expires” prestige arc last year?

  13. Gerard Plourde

    Are we setting up a “Funky gets Alzheimer’s” arc. I guess we sholdn’t be too concerned given the fact that Mort’s dementia reversed itself once he took up smoking.

  14. A HREF

    I almost forgot to renew my DL this year. But I renewed on the day it expired. It was just every bit as boring as it sounds.


    I can already predict where this idiotic story is going. Funky will attempt to drive to the DMV, yet he forgets he can’t drive. With Holly CONVENIENTLY leaving just minutes after Funky;s realization, we have four equally shitty scenarios

    1. Funky gets arrested by the police and we get lame sitcom style shenanigans. With a slight reference to Funky’s alcoholism added for good measure.

    2. With Holly gone, that leaves Funky with his only means of transportation…Crazy and whatever rundown vehicle he has. Again, another shitty sitcom trope. Hell I saw it on Big Bang Theory last week.

    3. We get another “technically is EVIL” trope where Funky has to learn how to register online.

    4. We get a stretched out week of author insertion, where Batiuk bitches about how long the DMV registration process is. Lovely.

    P.S. You know what a wonderfu, loving wife Holly is, when she doesn’t even bother to check with her beloved husband to see IF HIS FUCKING LICENSE HASN’T EXPIRED, EITHER!!!!!!!


    OT – You know it says something that in Go Comics under the tags for 9 Chickweed…Humor and Funny are not listed.

    I don’t think Comics Kingdom has tags, but I would be curious what Funky Winkerbean and Crankshaft have listed.

  17. Don

    I have a feeling this is the Ohio where, if your license is expired for too long, you have to take the road test again