Stairs Going Nowhere.

Comic Book Harriet here! And judging by this strip, I’m a very appropriate commentator for the coming week. I want to give kudos to poor Billy for last week’s run. He was dealt a terrible set of strips, and he was able to provide valuable context into just how freakin’ long Batiuk has been using ‘Dinkle Types His Stupid Book’ as a lazy repository for all bad band puns.

I’m sure that Tommy Boy thinks that he’s cleverly building up suspense here. Ooooooh he’s not letting us see the person who is so excited to be finding the Komix Korner for the first time! Who could it be? What drama will it lead to? Is it the long lost Afghani parents of Becky the One-Armed-Wonder and Dead Skunk Hair’s adopted step-daughter Rana? Who have just tracked the..bwahahahah… I can’t even finish that without laughing. Because Rana was dropped down the memory hole YEARS ago!

We do have to wonder why anyone ever, in the history of time, would have gone on an interet mission looking for Komix Korner.

Debt collectors.

It’s gotta be debt collectors.

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23 Comments

Filed under Son of Stuck Funky

23 responses to “Stairs Going Nowhere.

  1. billytheskink

    Yes, this is how the modern American finds their way, by driving around until the scenery matches the photo on their iPad.

  2. Rusty

    I sometimes wander down google street view to get an idea of how some place looks that I have never visited. But no, not while driving. Maybe Comix Corner is an unlisted address that doesn’t work with a gps?

    • comicbookharriet

      I also have a lot of fun wandering around in Street View. It’s my little Italian vacation while at work….but sounds really dangerous while driving. Especially when you swerve to miss blurry faced pedestrians that were standing in the street three years ago.

  3. The Nelson Puppet

    Please let it be the child porn authorities, please let it be the child porn authorities, please let it…

  4. redsnifit

    I’m guessing this is going to lead to an absolute bore of a storyline about the Korner having a super-rare Starbux Jones issue that these alleged experts somehow aren’t aware of.

    The masthead suggests we’re also going to get some of the most shockingly bad side-mouth the papers have to offer.

  5. Whatever this is, it’ll be boring and stupid and have no bearing on reality. Also, BRICKS!

  6. Ray

    Hmm…not many clues to glean as to whom has arrived. All I can gather is they have modern technology, but are driving a car that’s old enough to still have door sill post locks.

    I like the way ComicbookHarriet thinks…debt collectors.

    • redsnifit

      The positioning of the lock knob suggests that the doors are hinged at the back, meaning the car is either very old (’60s or ’70s era) or a very expensive luxury car. The iPad holder appears to be sitting in the back, which suggests he has a driver. My guess is he’s a rich nerd who’s going to enable Pete’s lifestyle for the next few years.

      Well, that or Batiuk doesn’t know which side of the street Americans drive on.

      • comicbookharriet

        Astute observation! You dissect Funky Winkebean in a way that would make Sherlock Holmes proud.

        • Hannibal's Lectern

          I’d rather see Doctor Watson dissect Funky Winkerbean. Understand that he need not be dead at the time (and after yesterday’s strip, how would we tell?)

  7. bobanero

    debt collectors

    If DSH gets his hands run over by a train this week, I’ll take back every bad thing I ever said about TB.

  8. Paul Jones: Also, BRICKS!

    Yes, but note how they are only sparsely drawn around the window, and totally absent in the second panel. Did Funky pay to have the building stuccoed? I think not! Compare today’s art to this exterior from a couple years ago: every brick is exquisitely rendered. I know there’s a new guy “penciling” (yeah, right) the strip, but bricks were the one element of the Funkiverse that have been consistently depicted without fail, and now we’re losing that. This one hurts…

    • Epicus Doomus

      Yes, the New Guy needs to work on his bricks, QC at Batom Inc. is slipping.

      • Hannibal's Lectern

        Not only that, but the sidewalk bricks in the view out the window DON’T MATCH the sidewalk bricks in the picture on the iPad.

        In tomorrow’s strip, the rich guy in the back of the limo will notice this and say, “I guess this isn’t the place after all.” Rest of the week will be Funky and DSH talking about the big car that stopped in front of Montoni’s and then zoomed away in a cloud of dust. “It’s called writing.”

  9. I’m confused. Does one have to enter Montoni’s to get to the comics corner? In the iPad photo, it looks like there’s a second doorway to the left that seems more likely to be the entrance to the stairs. But in real life, I guess that door goes nowhere, and everyone gets to everything through Montoni’s or not at all.

    • bobanero

      Actually, wasn’t the Komix Korner downstairs originally? Isn’t the upstairs of Montoni’s the famous Pete Ricotta/Durwood-Jessica-Skyler apartment? When did this change?

    • Epicus Doomus

      I find this fascinating as well. Apparently The Korner can only be accessed via that creepy stairwell, which should make a hypothetical arc about the KK fire quite entertaining. It’s funny how one of the two essential Westviewian businesses requires climbing a narrow staircase, especially given the physical condition of the average Westviewian/comic book fanatic. I mean there HAS to be an empty storefront or three in the Montoni’s district, yet the Korner still occupies that weird upstairs space. No wonder no one is ever there.

  10. Epicus Doomus

    Please be the health and/or business inspector…please be the health and/or business inspector…please be the health and/or business inspector…

  11. Don

    How long has the Komix Korner been there? It doesn’t appear in the tablet image, so I’m guessing it was taken years ago, the first panel is a red herring, and they’re not really interested in KK at all.