The Third Entry is When the Quality Drops

Link to today’s strip.

Folks, you’re not going to believe this, but for the third time during this stint, the strip is unavailable for preview!   Now, don’t worry, don’t worry–everyone please, just remain calm.   Your entertainment will be guaranteed by the Department of Redundancy Department, and the Natural Guard.  Just proceed, calmly,  down to the ticket booth and ask for Principal Poop and he will cheerfully, and decidedly, refund the unused portion of the money you spent to attend tonight’s episode.   Because here at Son of Stuck Funky, it’s a fair for all, and no fare to anybody!

I know Tom Batiuk thinks highly of his own work–he’s always giving himself award nominations, after all–but he really treats this stuff like it’s rare jewels, unfit for unveiling before a crass and ignorant public (those people who–gah–prefer attempted entertainment to underthought polemic) until he absolutely has to display his wares.   I’m sure he washes his hands after clicking “Send.”

I put it to you that a person proud of the effort he put into his work wouldn’t hesitate to display it.   A person who, on the other hand, is ridden with cynicism and resentment, and puts the bare minimum of effort required in order to cash a check, would likely not draw attention to what he produces.  Not naming any names or anything.

And if I had to guess, I’d say we have more “words spoken” between Dullard and Peeved.  Because I ain’t gonna call it “witty dialogue” when it’s nothing like that.

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24 Comments

Filed under Son of Stuck Funky

24 responses to “The Third Entry is When the Quality Drops

  1. Guaranteed the Firesign Theatre references above generate more chuckles than will today’s comic when it goes live.

  2. DOlz

    Brooke McEldowney is going to have a conniption if TB does an extended WW2 flashback.

  3. The Nelson Puppet

    The artwork is so bad that Batyuck needs to employ the Chester Gould “Dick Tracy” method of a text box with an arrow pointing to Darrin/Mason identifying the character.

  4. spacemanspiff85

    Man, that second panel is disgusting beyond belief. And the fact that Pete isn’t phased at all by Darin’s tongue display says a lot about their relationship.

  5. Epicus Doomus

    Huh? Boy Lisa isn’t in the military, fighting a distant war in some far off land. He’s in Ohio drawing comic books and waiting for his wife to sub-let their California apartment. Even as a fantasy it’s weak and feeble. Typical BatBarf, squandering story-telling potential on nonsense like Boy Lisa missing his wife as his readers yawn in disgust.

    • comicbookharriet

      I’m actually nearly offended by today’s strip. Working a cushy desk deal at your dream job is of course a 1:1 with brutal trench warfare.

      • Epicus Doomus

        It’s definitely pretty ham-fisted and, uh…over the top, let’s say. A few years ago Boy Lisa was working at Montoni’s for a living, now he’s lead artist for a fledgling comic book concern but, as always, it’s just never good enough for these mopes. If he had just asked Chester for a relocation fee this entire arc could have been avoided.

      • Jimmy

        I’m aghast that even in his fantasy, Darin seems derilict in duty. The smoldering rubble and tank stationed at the ready indicate this is not the time for penning mash notes, but instead should be met in ready position.

        I hope Jerry frags Darin, is what I’m saying.

  6. billytheskink

    Durwood has an “old heart”, eh? Guess he’ll be dead soon… Cro-magnon Pete seems pleased by this possibility.

    • Smirks 'R Us

      Of course his heart is old, his diet is exclusively Montoni’s Pizza. What else would he expect?

  7. spacemanspiff85

    Can Batiuk even write anything other than “people who are old in spirit, because they love comic books/vinyl records/movie serials from decades before they were born/writing letters or hate iTunes”?

    • Epicus Doomus

      And bear in mind that Darin is the resident “techie” in the strip. Or at least he was…

    • Buckeye Feculence

      Those who are old in spirit are the target audience. They ignore the lack of creativity out of nostalgia for reading FW back in the early days.

  8. William Thompson

    I’m looking forward to the next installment, when GI Gleep meets Ed Crankshaft, who wears an SS bus-driver’s uniform. “Ve haff ways of making you walk!”

  9. We should show this to the VFW. They might have something to say about it. Something…..profane.

  10. Charles

    Jesus, don’t these assholes have anything else to do?

    • The Nelson Puppet

      As John Lennon once memorably said to Paul McCartney, “You’re all pizza and fairy tales!” Substitute “comic books” for “fairy tales”, and that’s Batiuk.

  11. bobanero

    Yeah, Durwood has an old heart. He keeps it in a jar on the mantle.

    And what’s this “how is everything at home”? Isn’t Durwood at home, and Jessica is still off fighting in the Hollywood trenches? This doesn’t make sense at all. Unless it’s entirely Jessica’s choice, there’s no reason for her to be on an extended absence. The fact that Durwood is sending her issues (plural) of the comic books indicates that they’ve been doing this quite a while. I don’t know a lot about the comic business, but I’m guessing that there’s about a month between issues? Plus the ramp up time in setting up production before the first issue, so I would guess minimum three months have passed. Poor Fishsticks probably died of exhaustion three weeks ago and nobody noticed.

    • DOlz

      “Yeah, Durwood has an old heart. He keeps it in a jar on the mantle.”

      I immediately thought of Abraham Setrakian from “The Strain”. He kept his wife’s parasite infested heart in a jar that he feed with his own blood. Still this is more pleasant than anything TB has done lately.

  12. Le Chat Bleu

    “Old heart? Who says that?

  13. Le Chat Bleu

    Also really don’t appreciate the drop of spittle flying off Durwood’s lovingly textured toungue.

  14. Professor Fate

    Some things
    1 -To nitpick because well why not – isn’t the term ‘old soul’? And meaning of this is pretty clear – it’s someone who shows a depth of wisdom abut the world that one would not think they possess given their age. It does not mean someone with a stupid obsession for the pop culture debris from years before one was born and make a big deal about doing things like writing letters not sending email. Old Heart does not evoke anything other than a worry about hardening of the arteries. Old Heart? Premature Plugger is more like it.
    And World War 2 – really? I mean I have been told living in Cleveland is not a picnic but World War 2? And really do you miss your wife or have your folks complained bout watching your demon Spawn?
    And last – dear lord Boy Lisa looks like he could snag flying insects with that tongue of his.

  15. Gerard Plourde

    The awfulness is so pervasive I don’t know where to begin.