Clock Him NOW!

Some of the possible signs and symptoms of CTE may include…cognitive impairment…

from The Mayo Clinic page on CTE

Not only may Batiuk have finally succeeded in making me feel empathy for Bull…I think I’m experiencing a little “cognitive impairment” myself. Or maybe TB is the one who’s losing it. Back in 2011 he spent a week crafting a retcon in which Bull had only been pretending to physically abuse Les so that the other bullies would leave him alone. I think Les may have done Bull’s homework for him, or tutored him, or some shit, in return…I really don’t remember or care. Neither can I remember (help me out here, billytheskink) if Linda was part of the gang in Act I, or did she not show up until they all were adults in Act II. She didn’t know Bull and Les in high school? All the confusion even has Les scratching his head.

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10 Comments

Filed under Son of Stuck Funky

10 responses to “Clock Him NOW!

  1. erdmann

    When I was about 7 years old I was bullied by an older neighbor boy. Then, one day, we both ran afoul of a kid from the next block over (I think he was a kid, he may have been a shaved bear) who kicked both our butts. We bonded over it
    Years later, when my former tormentor was a third-year sophomore, I helped him with American history, a class he had to pass if he ever hoped to graduate. After that, he pounded anyone who gave me trouble. Fortunately, we never ran into that one kid again. I think he was already in federal prison (or relocated to the wild) by then.

    So, I guess what I’m saying is that both stories could be correct… Nah. It’s far more likely Batiuk just can’t keep his stories straight.

  2. ComicTrek

    Oh, boy, not the photo-flashbacks-that-are-actually-old-strips-redone thing again. I can’t take them seriously at all, and it reminds me of the wasted potential of that Time Pool…

  3. Epicus Doomus

    Look at Batiuk, shoehorning one of his “beloved” old Act I gags in there completely out of context for no reason whatsoever. Just pitiful. After almost two and a half years and not a single inquiry, much less a visit, Linda’s incessant complaining finally moves Dick Facey to offer his nebulous “help” if Linda should need it, which is a promise that at current spot prices is worth exactly zero times zero. He’s Les Moore, he’ll forget all about LInda and whatshisname as soon as she leaves the room. Dick.

    Did Batiuk just suddenly forget who the Linda character is or something? LInda, Les and Bull worked together for years in the very same high school Bull and Les attended, there’s no fathomable way that she wouldn’t know that Les and Bull have had an entire post-high school friendship and there’s definitely no way she hasn’t heard those old high school stories ten thousand times already. Yet today she’s all “gee Les, Bull just recently told me that you guys were real pals in high school”…I mean duh. Let’s just pretend huge decades-long swaths of the strip never even happened, why don’t we?

  4. Double Sided Scooby Snack

    “Bull says you and he were really close in high school, and everyone KNOWS you need to base everything you do the rest of your life on what you did in high school.”

    “I know, Poodlehead. That’s why I ‘teach’ at the high school. When I go home at night, I talk about high school with that woman who hangs around my house. Even when I’m flying All Over Ohio with my book tours, I still come right back to the high school. When I die, I want to be buried under the floor of the band room.”

    Seriously, why is Brillopad even bothering to bring up high school? Bullsquat and Goatee Boy have been BFFs for years in recent times. They played tennis, hung out. We mindless readers have been obligated to appreciate the irony that they’re such good buds now. Okay, Les didn’t bother to show up at the Hall of Fame thing, but why be a Beady Eyed Nitpicker about it? They’re close friends NOW, supposedly. Gotta connect everything back to high school, huh, BatBoy?

    • Gerard Plourde

      This whole week’s arc is weird that way. These are things that Linda should already know. The conversation between Linda and Les is not how people who’ve been working closely together for over a decade would talk.

      It’s almost as if TomBa is tying up loose ends so he can retire as soon as he gets his lifetime achievement award.

  5. An entire week of this nonsense…can you imagine hearing Batiuk telling stories in real life? I’m sure he’d be interrupted every ten minutes by someone saying, “And that’s THE END, right?”

  6. Double Sided Scooby Snack

    I’m calling Bullbushkashit on the whole “Bull and Les were pals in high school” retcon. I’m guessing BatBoy got tired of his 70 year old non-ironic fans in Ohio constantly asking how Les and Bull could possibly be friends now after years of bullying and assault.

    Instead of simply answering, “Well, high school was years ago for them. They’re both completely different people now, and each recognizes it’s all ancient history,” Batty had to forcibly re-write one of the principal themes of Act One.

    Bull was a mono-syllabic oaf, a knuckle dragger, and a general moron back in the day. It made sense, and all the pieces fit together. Nobody is willing to believe now that Bull was REALLY a sensitive soul who had a Special Friendship with the dorkiest dweeb in the school. Come the fuck on, BatWit.

    Also sends the message that bullying and abuse aren’t real — It’s just an act. It’s all for appearances. Just goofin’ around. Yeah, I’m sure teenage Bull and Les really hung out, reading Komix Bookx together on Friday nights when nobody was looking.

    • Epicus Doomus

      I don’t remember if it was during later Act I or early Act II, but it was revealed that Bull had a really shitty abusive home life which in turn led to his bullying antics in high school. Les and Bull then “buried the hatchet”, as they say, and became friends. That was what was so frustrating and stupid about the more recent retcon, as it casually undid the entire previous history of the character.

  7. sgtsaunders

    They may have faked it once, but I’ll bet dollars to doughnuts there are several more confrontations wherein Les had his shits beat out.

  8. spacemanspiff85

    Is it really bullying when the victim is Les Moore? Seems more like a public service than anything else.