Frankie, My Beer, I Don't Give a Can

From the FW Blog, Nov. 6, 2012:
At the moment, I’m hard at work on what is turning out to be a bit of a coda to Lisa’s Story. Events in the present will spark a sort of flashback/prequel which will crossover into real life with a visit to my old apartment in Elyria…as well as a crossover with Crankshaft thrown in for good measure. Oh, and lest I forget, a long lost character as well…Stay tuned.

Clearly Les does not share Cayla’s excitement over his basic-cable movie getting a free plug on a basic-cable news network. Meanwhile, somewhere in Elyria, Ohio, “a long lost character” with Paulie Walnuts hair and wearing a wifebeater clutches a can of beer and talks to his TV. It can be none other than the despicable Frankie, Darin’s biological father and St. Lisa’s…ex-boyfriend? Date-rapist?

Tom Batiuk Talks ‘Funky Winkerbean’, comicbookresources.com, March 19, 2013:
I ended up writing a story where Frankie — he’s been mentioned a couple times and has actually appeared in the strip very briefly, the guy who got Lisa pregnant — returns. In the return of that story we deepen the teen pregnancy story and say that it was a little more than just youthful indiscretion on Lisa’s part. There was some coercion involved and it’s like a coda to “Lisa’s Story.”

Guess we’ll have to wait for TB to “roll out” the story to see how he retcons this.

I wasn’t able to dig up a whole lot on the web about Frankie (he’s not even mentioned on the Unofficial FW Fan Page, though Lisa’s teen pregnancy is). I found the above strip from Act II, but can’t provide any context on what their relationship was by the time she was pregnant with Summer.

Les' Story

I don’t know how Hollywood works, nor do I pretend to know. Some of you readers, though, seem to have some insight into the movie-making process, and it’s fun to compare and contrast that with Les’ Hollywood “experience”. I know even less about the network news business, so I’ll just share my musings about today’s strip.

For starters, how long has Cindy, I mean, Cynthia Summers been an anchorperson? Guess she’s no longer “embedded“. And is it just a little premature to be reporting this “news from Hollywood,” considering that not even one page of the screenplay has been written? Do plans to make a made-for-cable-TV movie even qualify as “news from Hollywood”? And are news anchors allowed to report hometown gossip as “news”?

Hacking Away

Please join me in sending thoughts and prayers to those affected by the horrific and senseless terror bombings in Boston.

—TFHackett

Louder
April 13, 2013 at 11:44 am
Really, studios have a whole host of writers to “help” idiots like Less pull their heads our of their asses.

…and it’s certain that Les could use some help, though he won’t find any at Montoni’s. Please tell me that Mister Stuck-Up-a-Rope-in-Gym-Class isn’t weakly employing a sports metaphor, two sports metaphors in fact. “Seeing the stitches on the fast ball”? Well, for starters, “fast ball” in a baseball context is usually one word…and the last fastball that Les saw almost left him with stitches.

Oscar, Oscar, Oscar…

Louder
April 11, 2013 at 1:01 pm
Right, because Hollywood studios always have someone who has zero experience in writing movie scripts writing the first draft. That always happens.

Talk about putting the cart before the horse, huh? Though he can’t even get started on his screenplay, Les imagines himself and Cayla at the Academy Awards®. Even in his fantasies, Les must be self-effacing.
Hey, douchebag: there’s no “second place” at the Oscars®: you either win it or you don’t. And if Lisa’s Story were to be nominated, it’d be in the category of “Adapted Screenplay”. And oh, yeah: they don’t hand out Oscars® to made-for-basic-cable-television “movies”.  Anyway, it’s Les’ daydream: naturally, this high school teacher and part-time pizza counterman from the Midwest beats out the likes of Tony Kushner, Quentin Tarantino and Wes Anderson* to take home the statuette, as Lisa’s ghost, smiling approvingly, hovers over his left shoulder.

(*Just a few of the nominees from last year)

The Academy, as the copyright owner of the Academy’s “Oscar” statuette, and owner of its trademarks and service marks, including “OSCAR®,” “OSCARS®,” “ACADEMY AWARD®,” “ACADEMY AWARDS®,” “OSCAR NIGHT®,” “A.M.P.A.S.®” and the federally registered “Oscar” design mark, is required to protect its properties against unauthorized uses and infringements.