Where are they going? Corporal (!) Cory and Holly are dressed up to go somewhere. To the airport? Cory’s going back already? And we’ve never seen him interact with Wally, his uncle/cousin and fellow soldier. “We have to wait for your father.” “Dad?” No, the milkman, you idiot.
Becky, Rachel, and today, Holly, have all graced the Komix Korner with their feminine presence this week, threatening to poison the testosterone-laden atmosphere. So unlikely is Holly’s presence in the store that she feels compelled to explain why she is there.
“Yeah, John really supports me during marching band season.” Bullshit. Unless by “supports me” you mean “complains to our friends about our nonexistent sex life“. When have we ever seen John lift a finger to “support” her, during marching band season or any other time? He can barely support himself: he runs a business that discourages casual shoppers and is not accessible by the disabled, he turned down a chance to acquire valuable inventory, and his store serves as a clubhouse for local misfits.
Oh, Wally, you romantic fool. As if presenting Rachel with an I.O.U. for an engagement ring last summer near the gazebo wasn’t sweet enough…On Christmas Day , handing the ring in its box to your intended with a “Here you go”…instead of getting on one knee, or putting the ring on her finger. And then grinning like a dope at the prospect of never having to buy another thing for Rachel for the rest of your lives together.
Here’s a rather unusual Christmas Eve tradition that comes out of nowhere: serving Westview’s homeless a sumptuous Christmas dinner…of pizza. Yellow pizza, pepperoni not optional. Would it kill Funky to put out a tray of eggplant parm, and maybe a nice salad?
May I ask my veterans and service people in the audience: does Cory have to wear his uniform while he’s home on leave? Did he leave any civilian clothes in his bedroom, or just his comic book collection?
Son of Stuck Funky 
