Tag: Keisha

Keisha Brings It

http://www.chron.com/apps/comics/showComick.mpl?date=20110103&name=Funky_Winkerbean

One of the perks of being the heart and soul of the Lady Scapegoats squad: access to the gym for the dynamic duo whenever they’re up for a little one-on-one. Um…do these two young women have any friends aside from one another?

Chron.com Sucks (Update)
Turns out there was something up with Chron.com’s comics pages. I noticed last week that you could no longer access earlier strips by altering the date string in the URL. Now when you do that, a you get a message that says “For comics older than 30 days, go to DailyInk.com”. DailyInk charges an annual membership fee of $19.95. So long, free comic archives. This effectively kills all the links to earlier strips in the Act III section of this blog.

Pencil Mania

Click to view larger

I’ve read this “gag” over and over and, maybe because my senses have been dulled by holiday revelry, I just do not get the punchline. “Four pencils and an eraser” equals five…there’s five on a side, right? So they’re all tall except for one short player (the “eraser”)? But the one player Bull singles out, “number nine, their center”, is especially tall. Wouldn’t that make them four erasers and a pencil? Or one Number 2 pencil and four of those pencils you keep score with at mini golf? And there are only five of them? No subs? Doesn’t “number nine, their center” have a name? I know there are at least a couple of you who know basketball. Please enlighten me.

Houston? We Have a Problem

http://www.chron.com/apps/comics/showComick.mpl?date=20101207&name=Funky_Winkerbean

In case we didn’t pick up from last week’s strips that Les’ fame extends beyond Westview, Ohio, Keisha helpfully hammers home the point that this book tour is national, bitches. Summer’s glee over her father’s long-overdue success triggers a face-morph: not only do her beady little eyes light up, but her eyebrows suddenly thicken, her chin recedes, and she manifests an overbite. This startling transformation is lost on Cody and Owen as they pass by in the background, seemingly joined at the hip. Meanwhile, deep in the heart of Houston, Texas, Les struggles with getting his laptop hooked up to a projector. Where’s his “wife Mike” when Les needs him?

What the hell is Les doing in Houston, anyway? Yesterday he was in New York, on the set of the Today show, and Saturday he was calling Cayla from San Diego (there were palm trees in the background, so he sure wasn’t calling from NYC). Batiuk seemed to be hinting at a plotline involving John Darling’s widow Jan, a producer for Today, getting him booked on the show. Appearing on national TV would be a major milestone in an author’s career, but The Creator spends one day on it…SMDH (shaking my damn head)…

Awe-Sum'

http://www.chron.com/apps/comics/showComick.mpl?date=20101128&name=Funky_Winkerbean
Click to view larger

The She-Goats take practice in the dimly lit gym. Keisha, who of course must be double-covered, passes the ball to her bestie. Smilin’ Summer goes to the net a-a-a-a-n-n-n-nd…cut to the gobsmacked expressions on the faces of everyone in the room. Coach Bushka spits out his whistle. Summer, who less than two years ago was moaning that her game *@#s, has dunked the ball! And she’s only a sophomore junior white girl! Coach: how about splitting up your two superstars when you scrimmage? Better yet: just play Summer and Keisha against the other teams. With their mad skills, the two of them alone could easily make Our Lady of the Cedars look like the Washington Generals.