Tag Archives: Big Walnut Tech

Workin’ in a Goal Mine

beckoningchasm
September 11, 2018 at 10:45 pm
Pretty sure that third guy is supposed to be Funky. Because, who the hell cares.

Batiuk sure doesn’t, and I guess you’re right: Big Walnut Buck wouldn’t refer to the ‘Goats as “our team.” When have we ever seen Funky this fired up over a football game? Over anything? He’s sporting the same maniacal expression we saw on Bull’s face as he was leaving Jerome T. Bushka A&L Automotive Stadium Scapegoat Field last week.

If “our” running back has surpassed Bull’s record by 99 yards then he already has a hundred-yard game; a 142-yard game to be precise. Sophomoric Bull can barely watch, while Sophomoric Linda just keeps getting hotter.

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Buck Stops Here

Happy Labor Day, kids, and a hearty thank you to billytheskink for helming these last couple weeks!

God damn you, Tom Batiuk.

Three weeks of buildup to the Coming Alumni Band Reunion, two of those spent in the car with Funky, Holly, and her awful mom. Then a week of “practice” which takes place entirely off-camera. Followed by yesterday’s mawkish, verbose, and seemingly out of sequence Sunday strip, and then…do we at long last get to chuckle at the spectacle of an elderly, oxygen-huffing marching band? We do not. We get nothing, we lose, good day, sir!

And of all the dangling plot threads to pick up, TB decides to trot out Buck Bedlow, showing up as he always does, unannounced, at the Bushka residence. Buck, you’ll recall, showed up a year ago, to facilitate Bull’s rehabilitation from bullying, belligerent gridiron failure to enfeebled, doddering legend. The two erstwhile rivals reenacted their gridiron glories on Bull’s lawn. After they viewed Dinkle’s video demonstrating that Bull did indeed get the ball over the goal line on the last play of his last game, Buck presented Bull with a framed, fake sports page touting Westview’s “win.” This was followed by a trip to snow-covered Scapegoat Field to dig up a piece of turf from the end zone.

Bull’s wife Linda seemed to appreciate the visits, but probably thought she’d seen the last of Buck that night he revealed that he was in the same state of mental decline as her husband. But Buck was back a couple weeks later. And now that football season’s underway and the leaves are falling (hurtling, actually, judging by panel 1), here he is again. Linda doesn’t even attempt to hide her disdain.

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Yadnus Pirts

Link to today’s strip.

As is customary, Sunday’s strip was not available for preview.  They’re always a surprise, but rarely a good surprise, something you’d actually enjoy reading.  Here are some possibilities I’ve come up with; feel free to add your own guesses in the comments.

First, we might continue with Skyler and his g’rents, though that seems to be pretty played out.  Now, never underestimate this cartoonist for stretching something past its sell-by date, but I can’t really see where he could go with this to “make a greater point,” so we’ve probably seen the last of Dullard & Co for the nonce.

Second possibility is we might re-visit the premise from a week or so ago, and pick up how Chester, the wealthy comics collector wants to get in touch with the comic book writer Peeved Radish.

Third, Funky and Les jogging.  I mean, we haven’t seen that in pretty much forever!  Not that I miss it or anything, but the cosmos feels misaligned.

Fourth, we might find out what happened to Becky’s mom.  –ha ha, just kidding.  That boat’s been scuttled for, what, five years now?  No, the real fourth would be some sideways kids’ book that Ann found in her Dullard shrine, something that would inspire some wry remark about how things were better Back Then.

The fifth and final guess I’m going to add is that we’ll get something completely untied to anything from the last six months.

Anyway, we’ll all find out in a little less than a couple of hours.  Wow!–it’s just like Christmas Eve, right?  Only this is an eve where one measures not the delights that may come once morning breaks, but the various disappointments one is certain to encounter when one reaches the bottom of the stairs, beholds the menacing tree, and hopes that the bigger boxes are not addressed to oneself.

But, well, despite the paragraph above (sorry, folks, I’ve been a guest host for quite a long time, and it does leave a mark), there is one thing certain:  no matter the subject, the characters, the dialogue or the story–it will be dull beyond bearing.

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Oh no he DIDnt

Finally, after wasting a week of everyone’s time, we finally find out in today’s strip an inkling of what Buck’s Guilt over winning games no one remembers but these two losers from over 30 years ago. Linda, in the meantime has made herself useful by bringing him some sort of unidentifiable artifact that I assume is cyanide-laced coffee.

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Buck Mild

Sosfdavido here, and whaddya know, what looked like a pudgy, older white guy finally turns around to reveal a pudgy, older white guy! Now even Tombat’s most rabid fans are scratching their heads and checking the archives to see if the guy rendered fairly lifelike in today’s panel 3 was actually a character or someone pulled out of thin air.

Given the level of detail compared to most of the melting-dough faced citizens of Westview I’m betting it’s yet another character based on an actual person. Whether said person is thrilled to be depicted in such a bleak comic is a whole other matter.

Linda, in panel 2, meanwhile, looks like she just got interrupted in the middle of a 2 day nitrous oxide binge. He could have introduced himself as Mr. Ed the Talking Horse and she’d probably be just as non-plussed.

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Weekend Buzzkill

There’s no preview available for Sunday’s Strip so who knows what it’ll be about. I’m putting my money on a “Les and Funky jogging” strip.

Update: Nope! The story line, which is moving at a glacier pace, has Mysterious Stranger getting up off his rump to make his way to the parking lot to find his car, which will probably eat up most of next week’s storyline.

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Quite a load of Bull

SosfdavidO here, and I hope no one was hoping for any kind of resolution at all because today’s snooze-a-rama doesn’t resolve a cotton-pickin’ thing. My guess is Sunday will be all about Starbucks Jones decoder rings one head-tilting one panel strips tipping hats to artists who died 30 years ago.

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