Keisha – Page 6 – Son of Stuck Funky

Duh With A Capital D

“But…but…we already have the regular china AND the funeral china!!”. So yesterday’s seemingly out-of-nowhere gag about Chinese food WAS going somewhere. Les has sprung for two tickets to Hong Kong for some reason. I distinctly recalling him complaining about traveling (basketball team charity raffle fund-raiser arc) but I guess he’s over that now. Look how stunned Summer is to see Dickface spending money on a real gift as opposed to writing one of his laughable “books” instead. Or maybe she’s just baffled that her idiot father hasn’t mentioned Lisa yet. I can’t believe it either. Now perhaps she can explain why she (along with her sidekick) are there in the first place, as the reasoning behind it escapes me.

I really HATE those side-panel profiles like in panel two today. The Keisha one is especially…unflattering, let’s say. All this Les stuff is making my head hurt, it’s like being beaten with a sack full of bad puns, I’ll tell you what.

I was just thinking about an arc where Les and Cayla visit Hong Kong and I actually shuddered thinking about BatWrite drawing throngs of Asian faces. That will NOT go well, unless they stay in the touristy part of the city that’s full of obese white sad-sacks with enormous asses and bulbous noses, that is. Hooooo-boy.

Kiss Me Beardly

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Boy Lisa can draw comic strips? Why of COURSE he can! This is Westview, where drawing your first comic strip is like learning to walk in normal towns. And here I thought he was just a witless pizza schlub with Lisa’s DNA. Oh well, it isn’t like he doesn’t have the time or anything. “The school paper”…there’s a ringing endorsement. “Oh gee, some local dipshit who doodled in high school made me an anniversary gift…how thoughtful!”….things no wife says, ever.

“This time it’s about us”…oh my, that’s a line of dialog and a half, eh? See, I knew that if Cayla just kept quiet and remained patient Les would eventually get around to treating her like, you know, his wife. And she didn’t even have to die first! In Westview this is known as “personal growth”.

The artwork today makes me want to spray pure bleach directly into my eyes with a high-pressure hose. In panel one he’s waving and gesticulating in that condescending “I have a brilliant idea, allow me to dumb it down for you” way of his, then in panel two his entire face contorts into the total embodiment of smug self-satisfaction as he explains that HIS idea that HIS friend (actually bio-stepson related to Lisa no less) is working on and HIS publisher likes is all about “them” somehow. Then on top of it he face-melds with Cayla in panel three in a scene so disgusting I just want to drop it right here and move on, as it’s only Tuesday. It’s harrowing.

The Laffs Least

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“The Last Leaf”??? A “graphic novel” about Cayla?? But…but…she isn’t even dead yet!! Does not compute. But seriously, blech, oh no, what a shitty gift and etc. So typically Les-esque, they guy writes her a novel about how HE found love and how happy HE is, which in his mind if the most selfless and grand gesture he can make. Such a dick. And how thoughtful of him to rub the manuscript against his crotch before handing it to her, as if the gift itself wasn’t already bad enough.

And in the “things I never thought I’d ever say” department, note to Summer: put that hoodie back on…please. No one wants to see that, particularly in the morning. Why is she still there? Why are they lurking around in their parent’s bedroom first thing in the AM? Who DOES this?

Check out that look of smug, all-consuming self-satisfaction on his cretinous face as he explains his moronic gift, what a repellent display of Les Moore dickfacedness. “The Last Leaf”…give the leaves a rest already there, BatWrite. We get it, they’re a metaphor for death and the encroaching darkness of winter and so forth. It’s like he comes up with this stuff after staring out the window all day or something.

Electronic Fail

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Good old TomBat, always right on top of today’s latest fads. Has anyone, anywhere, used the phrase “electronic card” anytime since maybe 1996? Word balloon filling-upping at its very finest. I do like how Cayla refers to Lisa as “movie script” now, though. Hey, it’s progress.

Summer’s extremely irritating habit of making odd, childish noises continues today as she “ulps” in a manner befitting the fine young woman she’s become. Her annoyingness is only topped by her uselessness. God I detest her so much. If it isn’t about her why is she even here?

But Sad Sack Les in panel one more than makes up for Summer’s presence today…it’s absolutely glorious. Look at him, all humiliated and sad, it’s fantastic. Every Les arc needs to end with that drawing. If only that were possible.

Master Of The Obvious

Link To Today’s Strip

She’s correct: this can’t be good. And I’m willing to bet everything I own that it won’t be. Because it can’t be, you see? Anyway, TB appears to be dusting off the dustiest of old tropes today, the ol’ “idiot husband forgets anniversary” bit. How original. Check out Cayla’s vindictive sneer today, looks like Les is really (shudder) rubbing off on her. If the final panel of FW’s run doesn’t feature a silent panel depicting Moore Manor cordoned off with yellow crime scene tape, I’ll be shocked.

Speaking of the artwork, today we see why Summer isn’t a regular in the strip anymore. BatTom can’t draw her consistently, especially from a distance. That side view in panel one is hilarious and the almost triangular head in panel two is just as bad, it looks like an old nuclear bomb test film from the 1960s. Don’t get me wrong, it’s a good thing. The less Summer the better, as she’s just grating and annoying beyond belief. Summer is like having a dog with fleas or a backed-up toilet, you don’t need to elaborate on why it sucks, it’s self-explanatory.