So the clusterf**k that is the Save the Sports Raffle hurtles onward at breakneck speed, thanks in no small part to the estimable interpersonal skills of Chamber of Commerce president Winkerbean. No doubt it will be a smashing success, even with less than a week to publicize the event. “All of the local eateries” will be providing the food, meaning the menu will consist of pizza (natch), kebabs and tacos.
Tag: Montoni's
Pie 'n' Cry
Les continues to distinguish himself as Westview’s, nay, Ohio’s…hell, the world’s most clueless jackass. He decides to “cheer up” Summer and Keisha by bringing them to Montoni’s. The girls stare at their pizza in disgust while Cayla absently fingers a blemish on her chin. I’m sure that the next stop is Les’ favorite park bench.
Unfunnies
Today’s strip offers up plenty to snark upon! Let’s go in order, left to right.
The draftsmanship: terrible. Really. Funky’s profile has all the vitality of an Indian on the head of a well-worn nickel. Les’ sweater makes him look like a Westview High freshman after a magic marker attack. Crazy Harry looks strangely 2-D; and when did USPS workers adopt a bright yellow shoulder patch? What a crew.
Moving on: Harry has three school-age children (that’s right, three), yet he’s completely unaware that “there’s a school levy on the ballot?” (And isn’t there a school levy on the ballot every year?)
Panel 2: “Don’t you read the newspaper?” BWHA ha ha ha! That’s funny enough by itself to serve as today’s punchline! But boy, oh boy oh boy: panel 3…what can I say? Who has done more to suck the funny out of the funnies than our boy TB? And he’s copped to it before…
Punchlines? There should be an app for that.
The end of summer means hauling the outside patio furniture down into the basement (unless they do this every evening for some weird reason) and gives us a chance to see what cruel ravages dementia has wrought upon poor ol’ Tony, who, by even conservative guesses, must be pushing 80 by now. Thankfully, the time jump was much kinder to older characters like Dinkle and Tony than it was to Funky. A halfhearted attempt at humor is made, punctuated by a chime-in from the new employee at Montoni’s, who appears to be baked off of his ass.
Oh wait, that’s Summer,who lives with Les, goes to the same school Les teaches at, and works at the same greasy pizza dump he manages.
I know they say running away never solves anything but whoever said that obviously never spent any time in Westview.
Meanwhile, Tony, sliding comically into full blown dementia, complains that Darwin confused him with all of his technical gobbly-gook talk about application programming, probably in a desperate attempt to justify his salary, to which one thinks; hey, boy wonder, if you can’t explain what the hell you’re doing to the average layman then you’re probably not a very good MBA.
I Am the Man in the Box
Where I come from, we print things out. “Printed it off” sounded weird to me (like “playdowns” instead of “playoffs”). But a Google search turned up this forum thread, so we’ll allow it. Today’s strip continues to beat the same dead horse, but anyone reading it outside the context of the rest of the week’s strips would have no idea what the joke was.
Your humble scribe feels the need for a mental health week; for the next seven days, guest blogger davidorth will serve as your guide to the Westviewniverse!
Son of Stuck Funky 